Title: Musical Warfare
Pairing: Multiple
Genre: Humor
Warning: LMFAO, and other musicans
Rating: Adult
Summary: Never ever get drunk with Matthew and then start whining. Things go badly.
Notes: Part of this was written by Carrie.
America vs Germany, 3:0
“I will not stand for this!”
The door slams shut behind an infuriated Germany. Hungary raises an elegant brow and shares a look with Austria, who rolls his eyes in an annoyance. “I will leave this to you then,” the tall brunette said, reaching for the tray still full of two unused tea cups. Germany flushed briefly when he realized he’d inadvertently interrupted some much needed private time between the two older nations.
“You saw the video then,” Hungary said leaning back in her chair once Austria had left.
“When I told him to get a hobby, I did not mean for him to take it to this level.” In the back of his head, Germany was aware he was almost whining to the only mother figure he’d had. “I pointed him towards more useful hobbies then, then, this!”
Hungary sighed. “He’s lived through thousands of years. Whatever made you think that he’d be interested in stamp collecting or bird watching? Especially since the latter is something England is only too fond of.”
“But this obnoxious noise?”
“According to half of Europe, you have just described Prussia,” the other nation said dryly. “And the other half would tend to agree anyways.”
“I still do not think that being part of this, this LMFAO thing that America cooked up when drunk and then carried it out because his brother dared him is an appropriate hobby for a nation!”
“Well then,” she said carefully, “perhaps that’s why it’s appropriate.”
Canada vs America; 214: 198
Canada’s lying on his bed, laptop in front of him and feet swinging in the air. “I can’t believe this actually exists,” he says into his phone as an ugly electronic beat plays through his laptop speakers. “It’s like you took the worst of America from the last thirty years and put all of that… awful into two humans.”
Grating laughter from the other end. “Ain’t it just the sweetest?”
“Not the words I’d pick, but it’s certainly something else.” He shifts on his elbows, laughing at the neon flashing in the YouTube video on his screen.
“Has your bro seen it yet?” The other voice is practically jumping in excitement, and Canada’s smile smirks.
“He’s been in a meeting with the Cabinet all day.” The other voice cackles, and it’s nothing for Canada to open his facebook tab and copy the link into his eternal chat with America, who’s bored out of his mind and online at the White House.
God, if only Canada could be a fly on that wall right now.
England vs America; 414:413
America took one wild eyed look at the link his brother had oh so helpfully sent him. He was well aware of what anything labeled “rofl” might be, and it wasn’t boding well for him. A quick glance up to make sure the chief of staff and various other diplomats were buried into the latest set of cables from the United Kingdom.
Y u hate me?! He frantically typed, eyes peeled for any wayward heads turning his way.
His sleek phone beeped a few seconds later. No idea what ur talking about
That son of a… u do 2! is this about madonna?!
hoser!
Mentally he groaned to himself. America knew what was going to happen. This happened every time he went on one of his rare drinking benders. He’d always end up somehow on the border with his brother, and then his brother would say something, he’d respond back, and somehow a bet would happen. And he’d always, always, always lose. Especially if it was muscial.
If it was musical, he lost because England got involved; see re: Beatles, Punk.
And true enough, his phone responded with a small musical trill.
Shit.
If you wish to perpetuate this farce upon the world, I have no choice but to respond in kind. Enjoy Nicki America. I know she will.
Mother fucking…
England vs France: Amount unable to be determined: Amount unable to be determined