Watching - Another Jim/Bones Poem

[deepsorskies]

I am a tiger.
You watch me burn.

You are a dragon.
I watch you be.

Give me your wisdom
and I’ll fold my strength
around your heart
to never let go.

I am a star.
You watch me shine.

You are earth.
I watch you be.

Keep me grounded,
borrowed into your depth,
and I’ll dazzle you with my light,
keeping you happy, for a time.

Comments

[kilala10]

daww really loved the last paragraph :3

[deepsorskies]

I'm glad! Thank you!

[callieach]

I hope you do a million bajillion of these. ♥

The structure of this is so complimentary to the subjects. The comparisions are brilliant, and that repeated line - "I watch you be" - increases with poignancy at every repetition. I love the notion that Jim is just this crazy ball of... everything, while Bones simply exists, periodically providing a grounding force for Jim. They're so cute that way.

[deepsorskies]

<3<3<3

Thank you so much for your insightful comment! That's the second time you really nailed what I was getting at.

I'm delighted you like the poems!

[remorsful_rain]

I usually like poetry that rhyms, but this... This is powerful. I like the sixth stanza, it describes them so well. I'll be looking for more of these!

[deepsorskies]

I'm kind of gleefully happy that I made you enjoy a poem that does not rhyme. ;)

I like rhymed poetry very much myself, and I do write it, too. It really depends on the poem and what it wants.

I'm working on some more of these. Jim got to me somehow.

Thanks for reading and commenting!

[pixelmayhem]

Unn that last line killed me. Lovely as usual!

[deepsorskies]

Thanks! ... Although I didn't want to kill you ...

The last line was a little bugger - I just couldn't get it - or the entire stanza - right. Now I'm very happy that it worked for you!

[mach1n3]

Again, another great poem. Jim so thoughtful while Bones goes about his business, unknowing. The fact that the Doctor can just be and keep his Captain stable/grounded is so lovely. Oh, don't worry if it rhymes or not, I think non-rhyming ones work better anyway. Especially the last portion where Jim was the sun and Bones was the shade; so them.

Minor nit-pik if I may: in Japanese mythology tigers and dragons are mortal enemies. When I read your first two stanzas I practically freaked "oh no!" going first to that before realizing what your original intention had been. Oops. :D

Don't worry though! Totally reader error that was simply fixed with a slight change in perspective thought.

[deepsorskies]

Thank you for your lovely comment!

I didn't know about the tiger-dragon thing in Japanese mythology! Oh well, I decide Jim didn't either! ;)

Thanks for telling me, though. I often work with the tiger-dragon-imagery, and that information could be quite useful for the future.