SPN Fic: I know the pathway to your heart (1/2)
Title: I know the pathway to your heart
Author: deirdre_c
Pairings: Jared/Jensen, passing mentions of Jensen/omcs
Rating: NC-17
Warning: brief graphic description of torture
Word Count: ~13,000
Summary: When they’d started freshman year just a month ago, they’d been expecting a lot of strange things to happen. Strange was only natural when you attend college for people with superhuman Powers. So Jared had been able to convince Jensen that the whole trading-bodies episode was some kind of fluke, nothing to be worried about, nothing to report to their teachers.
A/N: Superhero body-swap college AU with a side-order of coffee. Written for my beloved __tiana__ for the spn_j2_xmas exchange. Title from a song by R.E.M. Thanks to my champ, untitleddemo, for all the beta advice and for being there for me and listening, and to bertee for her heroic modding work.
*****
Jensen wakes with a start. He surges up and somehow bangs his head on the ceiling before falling back onto the pillow. He rubs at the bump forming under Jared’s ridiculous mess of hair and curses like a motherfucker in Jared’s voice.
Because Jensen sleeps in the bottom bunk.
This is the second time this has happened, waking up in their dorm room to find that Jared has done… something in his sleep that caused them to actually switch bodies. The first time, last Sunday morning, they’d both freaked out, not knowing what caused it, not knowing if it was real or dangerous or permanent. But it only took a minute or so-after some less-than-dignified panic and arm-waving-just as soon as Jared took a breath and fucking tried concentrating, they’d switched back, Jensen’s head spinning with a weird combination of vertigo and déjà vu from seeing himself from the outside, trying to move inside someone else’s skin.
When they’d started freshman year just a month ago, they’d been expecting a lot of strange things to happen. Strange was only natural when you attend college for people with superhuman Powers. So Jared had been able to convince Jensen that the whole trading-bodies episode was some kind of fluke, nothing to be worried about, nothing to report to their teachers. Jared had been more earnest, more desperate than Jensen had ever seen him, so he’d let Jared persuade him to wait and see.
But now that it’s happened again? Time to seriously consider getting worried.
Jensen peeks over the side rail of the bunk to look down at his own sleeping form. Either he or Jared had kicked off the blankets in his sleep, and Jensen has the sorry view of his face smooshed and drooling into the pillow, of arms and legs sprawled ungracefully in various directions, of skinny, pale shoulders and obnoxious freckles. He slumps back into Jared’s bed. Jensen knows he’s a pretty decent looking guy face-wise. He hooks up with comfortable regularity-although Jensen assumes this is due as much to his famous family name as to his own appeal. But Jared, well, he’s straight-up hot, and this isn’t the first time Jensen’s wished he had a body like Jared’s. And, if he’s being completely honest, not the first time he’s wished he had Jared himself.
He absently reaches down to run a hand covetously over Jared’s six-pack abs, fingertips brushing the tickle of hair under Jared’s navel. It’s then that he squirms, achy and buzzing, and realizes that Jared’s got some morning wood going.
He freezes, listening carefully for his own smooth breathing below, while debating several long moments over just how questionable it would be to have a quick peek. He and Jared have roomed together forever, from almost the moment twelve-year-old Jensen arrived at The Heroes’ Home, the state orphanage for kids who’d lost their parents in the Outlier Insurrection, Jared having landed there a couple of months earlier. The two of them had been fast friends from the get-go, every meal, every class, at night whispering in the dark, making plans for the day they’d discover they’d inherited Powers and could follow in their parents’ footsteps, protecting people from evil. Jared would say “we’re going to change the world together, too, aren’t we?” and Jensen would swear that they would.
So you could say Jensen’s pretty familiar with Jared’s body, just from living in each other’s pockets. But there’s a difference between the skinny youngster Jared once was and the gorgeous guy he’s suddenly turned into. You’d better believe Jensen noticed that, this whole past summer before leaving for college, while Jensen had slept in until noon, Jared had been swimming, running, lifting at the gym, turning himself into a classic superhero hunk. And the spandex bodysuits they now wear for class in the school’s Battle Simulation Chamber don’t leave much to the imagination either. From what Jensen can tell from numerous discreet inspections, Jared appears to be quite… proportional. But there is still that nagging urge, just to know. After years of hearing Jared jerk off in the dark, Jensen just wishes he could see. Wishes he could stare instead of looking away politely as Jared slips into clothes after a shower.
Jensen isn’t deluding himself. Jared is straight, at least based on what Sandy McCoy kiss-and-told back in high school. She’s the only person the dork has ever gone out with, and only because Jensen talked him into a double date with Jensen and whatever guy-of-the-week he’d been with at the time. But, it doesn’t matter. If Jensen fantasizes about climbing up into this bunk to join Jared in the middle of the night, well, what no one knows doesn’t hurt anyone. Plus, Jared’s the one whose bizarre Power malfunction has landed Jensen in this body in the first place! Which means Jensen should feel no guilt at shoving down the sheet, slipping his fingers under the waistband of Jared’s impressively-tented boxers and lifting up to take a look.
Well, I’ll be goddamned, Jensen thinks. Because Jared’s even bigger than Jensen imagined. Bigger than any guy that Jensen’s been with. Thick and long, and isn’t that fucking unfair, because Jensen’s never going to be the one to enjoy getting fucked deep and hard by it. He freezes again at the thought, more explicit than he’s ever allowed himself before.
He sneaks a hand into Jared’s boxers. Just for a second. Just one feel, just so he can remember it accurately, later. Jared’s circumcised, and Jensen slides his palm over the smooth, ruddy head, a few fat drops leaking out to slick the way. He shudders, suddenly gripping hard as sensation grips him, heat zagging across nerve endings radiating out from Jared’s groin. It’s a familiar feeling, yet utterly new and different in this body.
And Jensen’s about to come, right now, he’s right on the edge. Just from that one touch. Just from knowing what Jared feels like with a hand on his dick.
He yanks his hand out and rolls over, pressing Jared’s erection firmly into the mattress, muffling a groan into a pillow that’s heavy with Jared’s musky sleep-smell. He can’t let himself. How would he explain it to Jared when he wakes up and they have to switch back? It’s just too embarrassing, too private, even for them. It’s one thing to joke around; it’s another to have to seriously discuss Jensen’s experience with Jared’s jizz.
Oh god, he’s got to stop thinking about it. Jensen squeezes his eyes shut so hard he sees splotches of color dance. He forces himself to think of the most unarousing things he can: Professor Beaver in a g-string, Osric heaving his guts out in the boys’ bathroom after attending his first keg party last week, Heyerdahl lifting a school bus and tossing it into a crowd of innocent people.
Jensen jerks his mind away from that last particular nightmare, but the brief memory is more than enough to cool him. He shifts around a bit more to get Jared adjusted, then sits up, more carefully this time. He swings out over the side of the bed, Jared’s legs so long there’s barely any drop, and lets himself down to the floor with a thunk.
“Hey, handsome,” Jensen says, kicking the bedframe next to his own head. He snags one of Jared’s t-shirts draped over the back of the desk chair and draws it on, Jared’s stupid, silky hair all in his eyes. “Rise and shine.”
*****
Jensen’s back in his own body, sitting on their scratchy, school-issue couch. A bit of residual frustration from not getting off must have transferred with him though, because, despite Jared’s apologetic, hang-dog face, he snaps, “Screw this. You have to go see Dr. Rhodes. This morning. Right now.”
At orientation, the whole freshman class had sat through a presentation from Dr. Rhodes about the school’s Counseling and Power Psychology Services, and both he and Jared, as students without any parental support, had been automatically signed up for monthly appointments. Jensen’s first visit had been uneventful; Jared said his had, too.
“We talked about this,” Jared replies placatingly. “I can’t tell her. What if something’s wrong with me? What if they kick me out?”
“Man, the last thing they’re going to do is kick you out. You’re exhibiting a Power I’ve barely even heard of! I imagine they’re going to want to know how the hell you’re doing it.” People born with Powers are pretty rare, and the majority of them are Kinetics like Jensen, who can move objects with their minds. The rest tend to be Shields, able to project a force-field around themselves and others, like Jared. Jensen thinks back to when the two of them manifested within days of each other last fall, both giddy with excitement that having complimentary Powers meant they’d be able to work as a team someday, the future they’d always dreamed about as kids.
In addition to Kinetics and Shields, though, there is a tiny fraction of Powers called Outliers: those whose Powers are distinctive, unusual, unpredictable. That handful of Outliers tended to make some people in the Powered community nervous, and lots of Normals, too. And not simply because of their association with Heyerdahl’s bid to destroy the Powers’ Leadership Council just a few years ago.
“I’ve been doing some research.” Jared starts to pace the tiny patch of floor space between beds and desks, barely enough room to turn around. “There hasn’t been an Outlier registered as a Swapper in 12 years, 19 more before that. And, as far as I can tell, there’s never been evidence of someone with two different Powers.”
“And yet, here you are,” Jensen says soothingly. If Jared’s going to work himself up, Jensen’s going to need to be the voice of calm and reason. Jared’s special? Fine. That’s not news to Jensen, even if he wasn’t expecting this particular expression of it.
“But an Outlier, Jensen? I don’t want to turn into something evil.”
“They’re not all evil,” Jensen insists.
Jared whirls to face him. “They killed my parents! They helped kill yours!”
“Yeah,” he narrows his eyes. “I’m keenly aware of that fact. But those were just a few bad ones. Not all Outliers are like them.”
“How can you be sure? Name one Outlier you even know.”
“My mom,” Jensen says, pulling a trump card.
“That doesn’t count,” Jared huffs. “She wasn’t a Power, she was the White Witch. She came from a completely different dimension than ours.”
“And she wasn’t evil.”
Jared’s voice rises desperately. “She had your dad!”
“And you’ll have me!” Jensen matches his volume. “You think I’m gonna let you go Dark Side? Ever?” Okay, time to rein things in. Jensen slumps back into the couch cushions, shrugging one shoulder. “Besides, you’re too lame to be a villain.”
Jared’s chin juts forward, his jaw clenching tight, chewing over further arguments. Jensen holds himself still, willing Jared to be reasonable. “Jared, the teachers are going to find out eventually. You can’t keep this a secret. You’re swapping with me without trying, without even being conscious, and that’s really, really… odd. You need to talk to someone and figure out what this is.”
Jared lets his head fall into his hands. “I know. I know you’re right.” Then Jensen thinks he hears Jared mutter, low and miserable, “You don’t deserve this.” But before Jensen can protest that it’s not about him, Jared sighs, then leans down to grab his backpack, swinging it over one shoulder and heading out.
“Wait,” Jensen says, getting to his feet.
Jared stops in the doorway to look back. “What?”
“I don’t have class ‘til nine. I’ll walk to CAPPS with you.” He reaches out a hand toward his own bag on the other side of the room and it zips through the air to him. “Let’s go.”
*****
After Dr. Rhodes’ door closes behind Jared, Jensen takes a seat in one of the low, deep chairs in the waiting area that CAPPS shares with the infirmary. The chair’s meant to be comfortable, but to Jensen it feels almost like he’s sinking, like it’s absorbing him. He heaves himself back up, and circles the wood-paneled room, inspecting the portraits on the walls of famous alumni-both Kinetics and Shields-who fought against Heyerdahl during the Uprising. There’s Janssen, of course, and Welling. Alba. Evans. Doherty. Some of the older Powers were there, too, like Spacek, Hamill, and Reeve. Finally, Jensen comes to a picture of his father, Alan Ackles. With his movie-star looks and self-mocking twinkle in his eyes, he’s younger than Jensen remembers him, the picture probably taken when he wasn’t much older than Jensen is now.
A familiar, leaden sense of longing and grief presses down on Jensen’s chest. He wonders what other people see when they look at this portrait. Wonders what they see when they look at Jensen. If all they see is his dad.
He turns away, thinks of waiting awhile longer, but figures it’s unlikely Jared will be done here before Jensen’s first class starts. He pulls out his phone and texts Jared to meet him on the quad once his appointment is done.
*****
He has no idea what’s taking Jared so long. Class let out an hour ago, it’s almost noon, and Jensen’s still sitting here on the bench under the giant oak that shades the front of the dorm. He tries to get some reading done for his Introductory Trajectories class, but he can’t concentrate, the figures blurring together into knots.
When he looks up, finally, there’s Jared, striding toward the bench, holding out a coffee cup like a peace offering.
Jensen grabs it from Jared’s hand. “Where have you been? Why didn’t you text? What did she say?” He shuts up long enough to take a sip, just now realizing he never ate breakfast. Perfection bursts over his tongue. Of course it’s a grande half-skinny half-1% split quad shot mocha latte with whip. Fucking Jared and his fucking memory for Jensen’s favorite. How is he supposed to stay mad?
He scans Jared’s expression over the rim of his cup, and can tell right away the news isn’t good. “So?”
“You were right. They’re not kicking me out.”
“And?” Jensen says, knowing Jared’s softening him up.
“Well, they want me to move to the faculty residence.”
“What?”
“Just temporarily,” Jared amends. “There’s another Outlier rooming there, too, a junior named Genevieve, and they… they want us to both be living in the same place.” To keep an eye on them, Jensen suspects, and can tell by the twist of Jared’s mouth that he’s thinking the same thing, too. “Just until I get this new power under control, then I can concentrate on my Shield studies again.”
Jared shifts uneasily, cracking the knuckles of his right hand out of habit.
“What else?” Jensen asks.
“They don’t want me to see you again until at least the end of term.”
It’s a shot out of left field, blindsiding him. “What do you mean ‘not see me’? Like, at all? Why?”
“I’m not sure,” Jared says. “Something about staying away from triggers or isolation being good for control or something.”
But Jared’s a crap liar. Always has been. And right now he’s holding something back, Jensen knows it. His face might as well be a window. And that conjures in Jensen’s mind the image of a cottage dark at night, high on a hill, the glow of a fire shining through glittering panes of glass, beckoning, welcoming with its warmth. Okay, not really where he meant to go with that metaphor, but that was his Jared all right.
Jensen decides not to push. He’ll have time to ferret it out of Jared later, when Jared’s not looking as if he’s about to drink poison or throw himself off a high cliff. “Look it’s only a couple of months, right?” he says, trying for bright side. “If you quit slacking off and get this all straightened out, the Dream Team will be back together before you know it.”
“Gonna change the world together, aren’t we?” Jared replies, reciting their old saying once again. But there’s a little quaver in his voice at the end that elicits a matching clench in Jensen’s gut.
“We sure as hell are,” Jensen says. Sure as hell.
*****
Jared moves out, and the dorm room is quiet without him. Where before it had been a refuge from the stress and newness of college life, now it’s just… empty. Most days Jensen grabs a pizza on the way back from class or a training session, as usual, but eating while watching a movie on the couch isn’t the same without Jared leaning over him to grab two pieces at a time or adding inappropriate dialogue at appropriate moments.
They text constantly, stupid little things that make him feel normal, like they’re about to see each other in a few minutes or something:
I’m gonna need a whole 6-pk of Mountain Dew if I’m going to get this paper written tonight.
learned how to make an umbrella with shield power today. an umbrella, how cool is that? with me as your partner, no more raindrops on your head, Butch
Zeppelin on shuffle. Life is good.
i just emailed you a picture of a cat in a top hat and monocle GAZE ON IT AND DESPAIR
Ferris is really riding my ass this week over that precision control test.
sounds kinky
Shut up.
day 23: not evil yet. gen though? definitely evil. she stole my last pack of gummis.
Miss me yet?
hell no asshole
But it’s definitely not the same as having Jared with him, nearby.
One Friday evening, Jensen finds himself sitting there staring at his phone, randomly waiting for Jared’s next text, and can’t believe how pitiful he’s become in only a few weeks on his own. He shoves the phone into his pocket and heads out of the dorm, wandering toward the two upperclassmen’s halls beyond the library at the other end of the quad.
There’s music blaring from a first floor hall, and Jensen walks in, finds people milling in and out of a dozen rooms. He already knows a bunch of sophomores and a couple juniors from his advanced TK workshop, so he looks around for a familiar face. He hears someone call out, “Jensen Ackles?”
He turns and some guy he’s never met hands him a red plastic cup full of beer and claps him on the shoulder. “Hey! I heard you’d started school here this year. It’s cool to meet you. I’m Christian.” The guy raises his voice over the din of the party and yells, “Hey y’all! Check it out. Alan Ackles’ son is here!’
Jensen takes a sip and tries not to make a face at the still-unfamiliar bitterness. Most of the time he hates it when his reputation precedes him. Tonight, though? He’ll take it.
He starts going out most nights, not just weekends, weekdays too. There’s always something going on around campus, and Jensen manages to keep occupied. And if his grades slip a bit, well, he’s not going to have to suffer through a lecture from stern parents, is he?
One night he spots Katie Cassidy at a party. She’s a senior Kinetic and supposedly one of the most powerful at school right now-a title Jensen already has his eye on. He wouldn’t normally have much to say to her, but she’s a TA in Pairs Battle Simulation and Jared mentioned more than a month ago that Professor Richings assigned Katie to him as a new training partner. Then, he never mentioned her again. Seems weird, like a weird combination. Jensen’s been training with Adrianne, who’s nice and all and turning into a pretty good Shield, but she’s no Jared. And it hits him kinda hard, right then, that Jensen hasn’t heard more stories about pairs training from Jared.
Well, there’s one way to find out more.
Jensen wades through the crowd to find Katie. He waits until she turns away from chatting with another guy and slides up. “So, how is the training going with Jared?” he asks with a smile. He doesn’t bother introducing himself. He’s pretty sure she’ll recognize him, even if he is just a freshman. “How does it feel to do the body-swapping thing?”
Katie looks him up and down. “Huh. You must be Jensen.” He draws himself up a little taller. “Training’s fine,” she says shortly. “Swapping? We don’t do that. Turns out the only person he’s been able to do that with is you.”
That rocks Jensen, more than a little. Jared hadn’t mentioned anything about it. “Well,” he covers. “We’ve been friends for a long time. Maybe he just, I don’t know, knows me best? But,” he says reassuringly, “I’m sure you guys make a great team. Um, are you a couple too?” Jensen mentally slaps his forehead. Oh, very suave. Really.
“No.”
“Well, I’ve been hearing a lot about Genevieve,” he soldiers on. “I know they’ve been spending a lot of time together. Do you know her?” He fumbles for the right words, an approach that’ll encourage Katie to cut loose with another tidbit of information about Jared.
Katie cuts loose all right, says disgustedly, “You’re a fucking idiot.” She takes another swig of her drink, gives him another long, enigmatic look. “Look, Jared and I are just friends. Jared and Gen too. But how are you and Kane doing? Or is it you and Manns? Or maybe my boy Amell over there?” She jerks her chin toward where Stephen’s leaning on the wall on the other side of the common room, watching him. He nods when they look his way. “Make it official with anyone yet? Because everyone knows you’re screwing around. Everyone.”
Jensen bristles. So what if he’s hooked up a few times? It’s like the whole campus is having sex, that’s what college is for, right? Yet here’s Katie giving him shit for it? “It’s nothing serious.”
“I’ll bet.”
Jensen chugs down the rest of his beer, flashing the empty cup at Katie as an excuse to end this excruciating conversation. “Look, I gotta go. Tell Jared hey. Tell him I miss-I miss seeing him around.”
It turns out Katie’s bitchface isn’t permanent after all, but Jensen’s not sure he likes this expression any better. “I’ll tell him.” She puts a hand on his arm as he turns away. “He’d be right here if they’d let him, you know.”
“Yeah. I know.”
Then he stumbles back to the freshman dorm alone, wishing he’d never spoken to Katie. Their exchange plays on repeat in his head and it’s all so stupid. Begging for scraps of information from strangers, over-analyzing Jared’s brief texts to try to tell what’s really going on with him, the big news all kept secret. None of this would be happening if Jared hadn’t had to move out. It takes Jensen three tries to get his key in the lock, and then he bangs his shin on the desk chair in the dark, falling forward into his bed, not even bothering to shuck off his shoes or jeans. So what if Jared’s got Outlier Powers? Fuck, Jensen’s the one with a dimension-hopping mom, he should be the freak of the freshman class. God knows, if Jensen was the Swapper, he’d go and switch with Jared right now, just to have the chance to fucking see him for a minute. There’s a small corner of his brain that knows this makes no sense, but Jensen’s drunk and miserable enough to ignore it in favor of some good, old-fashioned wallowing. Then sleep.
*****
It’s December, it’s Wednesday, it’s 8 p.m., and Jensen is studying for his last exam before the end of term. That’s when the news breaks: Heyerdahl has escaped from the purportedly inescapable stasis he’d been placed in seven years ago, after his trial for terrorism, sedition, mass murder, and a dozen other heinous charges.
Jensen’s inbox is immediately slammed with emails and the phone starts ringing nonstop, but he doesn’t want to talk. He just sits in front of his computer and clicks methodically from website to website, sifting through the first official updates and the flood of random rumors. Every place he looks, there’s video footage and images from Dallas eight years ago: the legion of Powers defending against attacks by the Outliers; the wholesale slaughter of Powers and Normals alike; Jensen’s parents luring the rogue Power, Heyerdahl, into the distant desert for a final showdown, their ultimate sacrifice and Heyerdahl’s capture. Jensen clicks through each site as quickly as he can, barely registering the sound of other students gathering in the hall outside and on the quad below his window, their voices rising and falling with alarm.
There’s a knock on his door, but he ignores it.
“Jensen,” a deep voice calls. “It’s Dean Morgan.”
Jensen gets up, his joints creaking like an 80-year-old’s, and he turns the knob, opening the door to the Dean’s solemn face. Jensen hasn’t seen Morgan in years. When he was a kid, Morgan had him brought to campus, right after he lost his parents. He’d been a colleague of theirs, a friend even, and had spent a day with Jensen, talking about Alan and d’Onna, and their shared past. Jensen’d only seen the Dean in passing a few times since starting freshman year, trying to stay under the radar, just a regular student, but he remembers Morgan well from that day.
“I just wanted to personally check in on you tonight,” the Dean says. “Make sure you know the Council and rest of the community of Powers is doing everything we can right now to make sure Heyerdahl is apprehended.”
“I know, sir. Thank you for coming by so quickly when you must be busy.” Jensen doesn’t step aside to let him in.
“You’re right, I’m actually on my way to the Capitol right now with most of the other faculty,” Morgan admits. “They’ve called all of the inactive Powers back into duty for the duration of this emergency.”
Jensen has often heard that Heyerdahl was-is-one of the most powerful Kinetics in recorded history, and he’s glad to hear the Council isn’t taking him lightly, even if he no longer has an army of supporters behind him. Jensen’s tempted to volunteer to go with Morgan, but he doesn’t bother, knows his skills aren’t worth anything. Not yet, at least.
“Good luck, sir. And-” He’s not sure how it will come across, but Jensen says it anyway. “Be careful.”
Morgan nods and turns on his heel, Jensen closing the door again on the curious faces of his hallmates who’d been observing the encounter wide-eyed.
He goes back to the desk, but doesn’t get back online, just hunches over, resting his elbows on his knees and staring at his clasped hands. He’s not sure how long he sits there, only a few minutes, he thinks, before there’s another knock. He’s pretty confident it’s not the Dean again.
“Go away,” he barks.
But even as he says it, the door is swinging open and Jared’s walking in, pulling his key from the lock and kicking it closed behind him.
Jensen rises. “Are you allowed to be here?”
“Fuck ‘allowed,’” Jared says, coming right up, his hands reaching for Jensen, settling warm and firm on his shoulders. “You okay?”
And Jensen doesn’t know where the impulse comes from, but he doesn’t hesitate, just steps into Jared’s space and wraps him up in a hug, his chin barely tucking over the top of Jared’s shoulder, his hands fisting in the back of Jared’s shirt. Jared falters for a second, Jensen feels hands hover uncertain over his back, but then Jared returns the hug, squeezing hard enough to take Jensen’s breath away. They stand there for long seconds, the pulse in Jared’s neck thumping strong against Jensen’s cheek, and suddenly all of the anxiety that had been riding him over Heyerdahl’s escape melts away.
He fights the stupid little frisson in his belly that sparks when he registers the press of Jared’s broad chest and the delicious, homey smell of him. Jensen cracks one eye open to find a vague blurry haze surrounding them. “It’s going to be fine, you know,” he mutters. “They’re going to catch him.”
“I know,” Jared whispers back.
“Then why do you have a Shield up?” Jensen teases, and steps back, giving Jared’s shoulder a friendly shove, not wanting Jared to feel how Jensen’s cock is perking up, the bulge probably visible in his ratty sweatpants. Great, the minute he sees Jared after weeks apart and he has no more control over his body than Jared has of his Power. His Powers, Jensen amends. And wouldn’t that be a bitch, for Jared to accidentally swap them while Jensen’s conspicuously hard from feeling up his best friend.
Jared looks around, blushing. “Sorry. Just-” The Shield encircling them swiftly sputters and fades. “-just a stupid reaction.” He gazes everywhere but Jensen, which is just as well, because Jensen feels like his own face is burning hot. “I like what you’ve done with the place.”
Of course Jensen hasn’t changed a thing since Jared moved out, all of Jared’s 70s rock band posters still litter the walls, plastic milk crates still sit stuffed with their sports gear jumbled together. Jared hadn’t taken much at all with him, betting on the fact they would actually let him come back. But there are a few strings of tiny colored Christmas lights draped over their windowsills and lining the bunk, a red fuzzy Santa hat perched jauntily on the stuffed moose’s head Jared had hung on the wall when they moved in. “Nah. Beth and Aldis snuck in here and did all this last week.”
A small smile plays on Jared’s lips, and he plops down into his old desk chair, running his long fingers along the edge of the desk like he missed the feel of it. “So you haven’t put up the tree yet?”
Over the years at the Home, the two of them had come up with a whole slew of stupid traditions for celebrating the holidays to make up for the old ones that had been taken away. Sometimes they’d gotten the other kids involved, but their little artificial tree with Jared’s hand-made ornaments and two presents under it on Christmas morning? That was just theirs, without fail.
“Dude! Of course not,” Jensen huffs. “Can’t put up the tree without you. All the stuff’s in storage down in the basement, though. Ready to go.”
“Okay.” Jared says, grinning wider. “What about this weekend?”
“This weekend it is.”
Heyerdahl will be recaptured, Jared will move back in. It’s going to be fine. Jensen knows.
*****
Word spreads through email that the rest of exams are canceled and the semester is officially over. The campus empties out the next morning, everyone urgently heading home for the break except for a spare half-dozen or so students, including him and Jared, who have no where else to go.
By Saturday, the faculty still haven’t returned. There’s no one in the administration office to give Jared the green light to move back into the freshman dorm, so he decides to stay put, telling Jensen that Genevieve is remaining in the faculty hall during the holidays, too, and he’d feel bad leaving her all alone. Jensen sulks a bit over being abandoned for Genevieve’s sake, but sucks it up, choosing to believe what Katie told him, and that Jared’s just being a good guy. Not that it’s any of his business.
Jensen rubs sleep out of his eyes, hurrying to piss and brush his teeth and pull on a pair of jeans. Jared had texted him an hour ago, telling him to meet up at the west gate and they’d walk into town to find breakfast. But just as he’s toeing into his boots, the campus alarm klaxons erupt into a barrage of shrill sirens. The hair on the back of Jensen’s neck springs to attention, and he knows immediately, this is no drill.
He bursts out of his room and, even though he won’t start his flying classes until sophomore year, Jensen throws himself over the rail and down the stairwell anyway, barely managing to levitate himself enough not to break a leg at the bottom. He hits the ground running, pounding out the front door of the dorm and racing toward the library, where the emergency vaults are located. He’s panting, but it doesn’t feel like he takes a breath until he finally sees Jared, already there on the front steps. He’s standing with Danneel and Osric, and there’s Genevieve, and another guy Jensen doesn’t recognize. Jared waves to Jensen as he approaches.
“We’re just waiting for Adrianne and Felicia,” Danneel calls out over the sound of the sirens as soon as Jensen’s within earshot. “That’s all of us students still here on campus, any maintenance staff wouldn’t be here this early on a weekend. We’ll give them a few more minutes, but then we’ll have to head into the lock-down area inside.” She throws up a solid Shield around the whole group, and Jensen’s glad at least one senior was still on campus.
“Do we know what it is?” he asks, but his eyes lock with Jared’s, and Jensen sees that he also suspects it must have something to do with Heyerdahl.
“Hey, Jensen, right?” the other guy says, and Jensen nods. “Malik,” he says by way of introduction. “Last year we had a tornado touch down a few towns over and the alarms went off then, too. Barely enough room for everyone to scramble into the vaults.” As one, they all look up, but all they see is crisp blue sky.
Then Osric shouts, “There they are,” pointing across the quad at two figures sprinting toward them.
“Okay, that’s it. We can’t wait any longer. Let’s go,” Danneel orders, and drops her Shield as Felicia and Adrianne dash up the stairs to join the group.
But just as soon as the Shield goes down, Jensen sees his friends thrown to the ground in all directions, bowling pins under a hard strike, and simultaneously feels himself yanked into air like a marionette on strings. He tries to push back with his own Power, but he might as well be pushing against a steel wall. The klaxons overhead all cut off mid-peal, and in the sudden silence a voice he’s only heard before on television documentaries, and in his nightmares, sounds from behind them.
“Not so fast, kids,” drawls Heyerdahl. “I just need a few minutes to talk to young Mister Ackles here.”
The huge oak doors to the library fly open and Jensen is swept inside behind Heyerdahl, who strides through the main foyer and turns into the first nearby office. Jensen struggles, but can do nothing other than be pulled along, toes brushing the carpet, until Heyerdahl plasters him up against the far wall, all his muscles frozen. Through the office’s still-open door, Jensen can see Jared and the others rushing into the library, taking cover behind the reference desk. Jensen tries to scream at them to run, to wait for help, but he doesn’t have time before Heyerdahl steps up into his face, blocking everything else out, cold, sunken eyes boring a hole right through him.
“Ah, Jensen. Look how you’ve grown. You couldn’t possibly remember, but your parents introduced us when you were just a baby, when your father and I were on the Council together.” He smiles in a singularly dreadful way, the gaunt planes of his face like icy cliffs. “That was all before the more recent unpleasantness, of course.”
Jensen wants to fling himself just a few inches forward and turn that smile into pulp with his fists, wants to use his Power to rip Heyerdahl limb from limb. Hell, he’d settle for being able to spit in his face. Instead, all he can manage from underneath the pressure bearing down on his chest is to grit out, “Go fuck yourself.”
“Alas,” Heyerdahl replies, “I don’t have time for a cordial chat. All I need from you is a tiny bit of information, and then we’re done here. Perhaps a traditional monologue will serve. ”
He turns away and stalks across the office, hands clasped behind his back, addressing Jensen, but raising his voice toward the six figures still huddled together near the front doors. “As you probably know, your lovely mother’s Powers were not inborn, like ours, but derived from the amulet she brought with her when she arrived here from across the void. It’s a powerful weapon. One that defeated me once, not without cost.” He turns his head and smirks at Jensen over his shoulder. “Most of the cost borne by you.” He turns back to Jared and the others, pinning them like bugs under his gaze. “But since I am currently without many weapons to fight off my pursuers, I need it. And you are going to tell me where it is. We can do this indirectly…” Heyerdahl casually gestures and Jensen sees a row of display cases go tumbling down over the group outside, ricocheting off of Danneel’s Shield and onto the floor. “Or directly.” He turns back to Jensen and a small crack echoes in the room. Jensen screams in surprise and agony as pain rockets up his left arm. He looks down and nearly retches when he sees his pinkie twisted at an unnatural near-right angle from the rest of his hand.
Jensen closes his eyes against the pain and when he opens them again, Heyerdahl is back in his face. “I don’t have much time, Jensen,” he hisses. “Your teachers and many other foolhardy Powers are rushing here as we speak.” Jensen nearly gags again as Heyerdahl reaches up and cups Jensen’s chin, stroking a thumb across his cheekbone. “Ah, you look very much like your mother. Don’t make me ruin this pretty face, too.” Jensen can feel the press of Heyerdahl’s thumbnail against his skin. “Tell me where the amulet is, or I’ll take an eye next.”
Jensen draws a deep breath in, tries to prepare himself, when his stomach flips, dips, and suddenly he’s standing out in the library entrance, Danneel and Osric each holding an arm, yelling at him, “Don’t! Don’t!”
He blinks, can see through the door, thirty feet away, Heyerdahl with his hands on Jensen’s face, and it dawns on him what Jared’s done.
“No,” he breathes.
*****
On to Part 2
Author: deirdre_c
Pairings: Jared/Jensen, passing mentions of Jensen/omcs
Rating: NC-17
Warning: brief graphic description of torture
Word Count: ~13,000
Summary: When they’d started freshman year just a month ago, they’d been expecting a lot of strange things to happen. Strange was only natural when you attend college for people with superhuman Powers. So Jared had been able to convince Jensen that the whole trading-bodies episode was some kind of fluke, nothing to be worried about, nothing to report to their teachers.
A/N: Superhero body-swap college AU with a side-order of coffee. Written for my beloved __tiana__ for the spn_j2_xmas exchange. Title from a song by R.E.M. Thanks to my champ, untitleddemo, for all the beta advice and for being there for me and listening, and to bertee for her heroic modding work.
*****
Jensen wakes with a start. He surges up and somehow bangs his head on the ceiling before falling back onto the pillow. He rubs at the bump forming under Jared’s ridiculous mess of hair and curses like a motherfucker in Jared’s voice.
Because Jensen sleeps in the bottom bunk.
This is the second time this has happened, waking up in their dorm room to find that Jared has done… something in his sleep that caused them to actually switch bodies. The first time, last Sunday morning, they’d both freaked out, not knowing what caused it, not knowing if it was real or dangerous or permanent. But it only took a minute or so-after some less-than-dignified panic and arm-waving-just as soon as Jared took a breath and fucking tried concentrating, they’d switched back, Jensen’s head spinning with a weird combination of vertigo and déjà vu from seeing himself from the outside, trying to move inside someone else’s skin.
When they’d started freshman year just a month ago, they’d been expecting a lot of strange things to happen. Strange was only natural when you attend college for people with superhuman Powers. So Jared had been able to convince Jensen that the whole trading-bodies episode was some kind of fluke, nothing to be worried about, nothing to report to their teachers. Jared had been more earnest, more desperate than Jensen had ever seen him, so he’d let Jared persuade him to wait and see.
But now that it’s happened again? Time to seriously consider getting worried.
Jensen peeks over the side rail of the bunk to look down at his own sleeping form. Either he or Jared had kicked off the blankets in his sleep, and Jensen has the sorry view of his face smooshed and drooling into the pillow, of arms and legs sprawled ungracefully in various directions, of skinny, pale shoulders and obnoxious freckles. He slumps back into Jared’s bed. Jensen knows he’s a pretty decent looking guy face-wise. He hooks up with comfortable regularity-although Jensen assumes this is due as much to his famous family name as to his own appeal. But Jared, well, he’s straight-up hot, and this isn’t the first time Jensen’s wished he had a body like Jared’s. And, if he’s being completely honest, not the first time he’s wished he had Jared himself.
He absently reaches down to run a hand covetously over Jared’s six-pack abs, fingertips brushing the tickle of hair under Jared’s navel. It’s then that he squirms, achy and buzzing, and realizes that Jared’s got some morning wood going.
He freezes, listening carefully for his own smooth breathing below, while debating several long moments over just how questionable it would be to have a quick peek. He and Jared have roomed together forever, from almost the moment twelve-year-old Jensen arrived at The Heroes’ Home, the state orphanage for kids who’d lost their parents in the Outlier Insurrection, Jared having landed there a couple of months earlier. The two of them had been fast friends from the get-go, every meal, every class, at night whispering in the dark, making plans for the day they’d discover they’d inherited Powers and could follow in their parents’ footsteps, protecting people from evil. Jared would say “we’re going to change the world together, too, aren’t we?” and Jensen would swear that they would.
So you could say Jensen’s pretty familiar with Jared’s body, just from living in each other’s pockets. But there’s a difference between the skinny youngster Jared once was and the gorgeous guy he’s suddenly turned into. You’d better believe Jensen noticed that, this whole past summer before leaving for college, while Jensen had slept in until noon, Jared had been swimming, running, lifting at the gym, turning himself into a classic superhero hunk. And the spandex bodysuits they now wear for class in the school’s Battle Simulation Chamber don’t leave much to the imagination either. From what Jensen can tell from numerous discreet inspections, Jared appears to be quite… proportional. But there is still that nagging urge, just to know. After years of hearing Jared jerk off in the dark, Jensen just wishes he could see. Wishes he could stare instead of looking away politely as Jared slips into clothes after a shower.
Jensen isn’t deluding himself. Jared is straight, at least based on what Sandy McCoy kiss-and-told back in high school. She’s the only person the dork has ever gone out with, and only because Jensen talked him into a double date with Jensen and whatever guy-of-the-week he’d been with at the time. But, it doesn’t matter. If Jensen fantasizes about climbing up into this bunk to join Jared in the middle of the night, well, what no one knows doesn’t hurt anyone. Plus, Jared’s the one whose bizarre Power malfunction has landed Jensen in this body in the first place! Which means Jensen should feel no guilt at shoving down the sheet, slipping his fingers under the waistband of Jared’s impressively-tented boxers and lifting up to take a look.
Well, I’ll be goddamned, Jensen thinks. Because Jared’s even bigger than Jensen imagined. Bigger than any guy that Jensen’s been with. Thick and long, and isn’t that fucking unfair, because Jensen’s never going to be the one to enjoy getting fucked deep and hard by it. He freezes again at the thought, more explicit than he’s ever allowed himself before.
He sneaks a hand into Jared’s boxers. Just for a second. Just one feel, just so he can remember it accurately, later. Jared’s circumcised, and Jensen slides his palm over the smooth, ruddy head, a few fat drops leaking out to slick the way. He shudders, suddenly gripping hard as sensation grips him, heat zagging across nerve endings radiating out from Jared’s groin. It’s a familiar feeling, yet utterly new and different in this body.
And Jensen’s about to come, right now, he’s right on the edge. Just from that one touch. Just from knowing what Jared feels like with a hand on his dick.
He yanks his hand out and rolls over, pressing Jared’s erection firmly into the mattress, muffling a groan into a pillow that’s heavy with Jared’s musky sleep-smell. He can’t let himself. How would he explain it to Jared when he wakes up and they have to switch back? It’s just too embarrassing, too private, even for them. It’s one thing to joke around; it’s another to have to seriously discuss Jensen’s experience with Jared’s jizz.
Oh god, he’s got to stop thinking about it. Jensen squeezes his eyes shut so hard he sees splotches of color dance. He forces himself to think of the most unarousing things he can: Professor Beaver in a g-string, Osric heaving his guts out in the boys’ bathroom after attending his first keg party last week, Heyerdahl lifting a school bus and tossing it into a crowd of innocent people.
Jensen jerks his mind away from that last particular nightmare, but the brief memory is more than enough to cool him. He shifts around a bit more to get Jared adjusted, then sits up, more carefully this time. He swings out over the side of the bed, Jared’s legs so long there’s barely any drop, and lets himself down to the floor with a thunk.
“Hey, handsome,” Jensen says, kicking the bedframe next to his own head. He snags one of Jared’s t-shirts draped over the back of the desk chair and draws it on, Jared’s stupid, silky hair all in his eyes. “Rise and shine.”
*****
Jensen’s back in his own body, sitting on their scratchy, school-issue couch. A bit of residual frustration from not getting off must have transferred with him though, because, despite Jared’s apologetic, hang-dog face, he snaps, “Screw this. You have to go see Dr. Rhodes. This morning. Right now.”
At orientation, the whole freshman class had sat through a presentation from Dr. Rhodes about the school’s Counseling and Power Psychology Services, and both he and Jared, as students without any parental support, had been automatically signed up for monthly appointments. Jensen’s first visit had been uneventful; Jared said his had, too.
“We talked about this,” Jared replies placatingly. “I can’t tell her. What if something’s wrong with me? What if they kick me out?”
“Man, the last thing they’re going to do is kick you out. You’re exhibiting a Power I’ve barely even heard of! I imagine they’re going to want to know how the hell you’re doing it.” People born with Powers are pretty rare, and the majority of them are Kinetics like Jensen, who can move objects with their minds. The rest tend to be Shields, able to project a force-field around themselves and others, like Jared. Jensen thinks back to when the two of them manifested within days of each other last fall, both giddy with excitement that having complimentary Powers meant they’d be able to work as a team someday, the future they’d always dreamed about as kids.
In addition to Kinetics and Shields, though, there is a tiny fraction of Powers called Outliers: those whose Powers are distinctive, unusual, unpredictable. That handful of Outliers tended to make some people in the Powered community nervous, and lots of Normals, too. And not simply because of their association with Heyerdahl’s bid to destroy the Powers’ Leadership Council just a few years ago.
“I’ve been doing some research.” Jared starts to pace the tiny patch of floor space between beds and desks, barely enough room to turn around. “There hasn’t been an Outlier registered as a Swapper in 12 years, 19 more before that. And, as far as I can tell, there’s never been evidence of someone with two different Powers.”
“And yet, here you are,” Jensen says soothingly. If Jared’s going to work himself up, Jensen’s going to need to be the voice of calm and reason. Jared’s special? Fine. That’s not news to Jensen, even if he wasn’t expecting this particular expression of it.
“But an Outlier, Jensen? I don’t want to turn into something evil.”
“They’re not all evil,” Jensen insists.
Jared whirls to face him. “They killed my parents! They helped kill yours!”
“Yeah,” he narrows his eyes. “I’m keenly aware of that fact. But those were just a few bad ones. Not all Outliers are like them.”
“How can you be sure? Name one Outlier you even know.”
“My mom,” Jensen says, pulling a trump card.
“That doesn’t count,” Jared huffs. “She wasn’t a Power, she was the White Witch. She came from a completely different dimension than ours.”
“And she wasn’t evil.”
Jared’s voice rises desperately. “She had your dad!”
“And you’ll have me!” Jensen matches his volume. “You think I’m gonna let you go Dark Side? Ever?” Okay, time to rein things in. Jensen slumps back into the couch cushions, shrugging one shoulder. “Besides, you’re too lame to be a villain.”
Jared’s chin juts forward, his jaw clenching tight, chewing over further arguments. Jensen holds himself still, willing Jared to be reasonable. “Jared, the teachers are going to find out eventually. You can’t keep this a secret. You’re swapping with me without trying, without even being conscious, and that’s really, really… odd. You need to talk to someone and figure out what this is.”
Jared lets his head fall into his hands. “I know. I know you’re right.” Then Jensen thinks he hears Jared mutter, low and miserable, “You don’t deserve this.” But before Jensen can protest that it’s not about him, Jared sighs, then leans down to grab his backpack, swinging it over one shoulder and heading out.
“Wait,” Jensen says, getting to his feet.
Jared stops in the doorway to look back. “What?”
“I don’t have class ‘til nine. I’ll walk to CAPPS with you.” He reaches out a hand toward his own bag on the other side of the room and it zips through the air to him. “Let’s go.”
*****
After Dr. Rhodes’ door closes behind Jared, Jensen takes a seat in one of the low, deep chairs in the waiting area that CAPPS shares with the infirmary. The chair’s meant to be comfortable, but to Jensen it feels almost like he’s sinking, like it’s absorbing him. He heaves himself back up, and circles the wood-paneled room, inspecting the portraits on the walls of famous alumni-both Kinetics and Shields-who fought against Heyerdahl during the Uprising. There’s Janssen, of course, and Welling. Alba. Evans. Doherty. Some of the older Powers were there, too, like Spacek, Hamill, and Reeve. Finally, Jensen comes to a picture of his father, Alan Ackles. With his movie-star looks and self-mocking twinkle in his eyes, he’s younger than Jensen remembers him, the picture probably taken when he wasn’t much older than Jensen is now.
A familiar, leaden sense of longing and grief presses down on Jensen’s chest. He wonders what other people see when they look at this portrait. Wonders what they see when they look at Jensen. If all they see is his dad.
He turns away, thinks of waiting awhile longer, but figures it’s unlikely Jared will be done here before Jensen’s first class starts. He pulls out his phone and texts Jared to meet him on the quad once his appointment is done.
*****
He has no idea what’s taking Jared so long. Class let out an hour ago, it’s almost noon, and Jensen’s still sitting here on the bench under the giant oak that shades the front of the dorm. He tries to get some reading done for his Introductory Trajectories class, but he can’t concentrate, the figures blurring together into knots.
When he looks up, finally, there’s Jared, striding toward the bench, holding out a coffee cup like a peace offering.
Jensen grabs it from Jared’s hand. “Where have you been? Why didn’t you text? What did she say?” He shuts up long enough to take a sip, just now realizing he never ate breakfast. Perfection bursts over his tongue. Of course it’s a grande half-skinny half-1% split quad shot mocha latte with whip. Fucking Jared and his fucking memory for Jensen’s favorite. How is he supposed to stay mad?
He scans Jared’s expression over the rim of his cup, and can tell right away the news isn’t good. “So?”
“You were right. They’re not kicking me out.”
“And?” Jensen says, knowing Jared’s softening him up.
“Well, they want me to move to the faculty residence.”
“What?”
“Just temporarily,” Jared amends. “There’s another Outlier rooming there, too, a junior named Genevieve, and they… they want us to both be living in the same place.” To keep an eye on them, Jensen suspects, and can tell by the twist of Jared’s mouth that he’s thinking the same thing, too. “Just until I get this new power under control, then I can concentrate on my Shield studies again.”
Jared shifts uneasily, cracking the knuckles of his right hand out of habit.
“What else?” Jensen asks.
“They don’t want me to see you again until at least the end of term.”
It’s a shot out of left field, blindsiding him. “What do you mean ‘not see me’? Like, at all? Why?”
“I’m not sure,” Jared says. “Something about staying away from triggers or isolation being good for control or something.”
But Jared’s a crap liar. Always has been. And right now he’s holding something back, Jensen knows it. His face might as well be a window. And that conjures in Jensen’s mind the image of a cottage dark at night, high on a hill, the glow of a fire shining through glittering panes of glass, beckoning, welcoming with its warmth. Okay, not really where he meant to go with that metaphor, but that was his Jared all right.
Jensen decides not to push. He’ll have time to ferret it out of Jared later, when Jared’s not looking as if he’s about to drink poison or throw himself off a high cliff. “Look it’s only a couple of months, right?” he says, trying for bright side. “If you quit slacking off and get this all straightened out, the Dream Team will be back together before you know it.”
“Gonna change the world together, aren’t we?” Jared replies, reciting their old saying once again. But there’s a little quaver in his voice at the end that elicits a matching clench in Jensen’s gut.
“We sure as hell are,” Jensen says. Sure as hell.
*****
Jared moves out, and the dorm room is quiet without him. Where before it had been a refuge from the stress and newness of college life, now it’s just… empty. Most days Jensen grabs a pizza on the way back from class or a training session, as usual, but eating while watching a movie on the couch isn’t the same without Jared leaning over him to grab two pieces at a time or adding inappropriate dialogue at appropriate moments.
They text constantly, stupid little things that make him feel normal, like they’re about to see each other in a few minutes or something:
I’m gonna need a whole 6-pk of Mountain Dew if I’m going to get this paper written tonight.
learned how to make an umbrella with shield power today. an umbrella, how cool is that? with me as your partner, no more raindrops on your head, Butch
Zeppelin on shuffle. Life is good.
i just emailed you a picture of a cat in a top hat and monocle GAZE ON IT AND DESPAIR
Ferris is really riding my ass this week over that precision control test.
sounds kinky
Shut up.
day 23: not evil yet. gen though? definitely evil. she stole my last pack of gummis.
Miss me yet?
hell no asshole
But it’s definitely not the same as having Jared with him, nearby.
One Friday evening, Jensen finds himself sitting there staring at his phone, randomly waiting for Jared’s next text, and can’t believe how pitiful he’s become in only a few weeks on his own. He shoves the phone into his pocket and heads out of the dorm, wandering toward the two upperclassmen’s halls beyond the library at the other end of the quad.
There’s music blaring from a first floor hall, and Jensen walks in, finds people milling in and out of a dozen rooms. He already knows a bunch of sophomores and a couple juniors from his advanced TK workshop, so he looks around for a familiar face. He hears someone call out, “Jensen Ackles?”
He turns and some guy he’s never met hands him a red plastic cup full of beer and claps him on the shoulder. “Hey! I heard you’d started school here this year. It’s cool to meet you. I’m Christian.” The guy raises his voice over the din of the party and yells, “Hey y’all! Check it out. Alan Ackles’ son is here!’
Jensen takes a sip and tries not to make a face at the still-unfamiliar bitterness. Most of the time he hates it when his reputation precedes him. Tonight, though? He’ll take it.
He starts going out most nights, not just weekends, weekdays too. There’s always something going on around campus, and Jensen manages to keep occupied. And if his grades slip a bit, well, he’s not going to have to suffer through a lecture from stern parents, is he?
One night he spots Katie Cassidy at a party. She’s a senior Kinetic and supposedly one of the most powerful at school right now-a title Jensen already has his eye on. He wouldn’t normally have much to say to her, but she’s a TA in Pairs Battle Simulation and Jared mentioned more than a month ago that Professor Richings assigned Katie to him as a new training partner. Then, he never mentioned her again. Seems weird, like a weird combination. Jensen’s been training with Adrianne, who’s nice and all and turning into a pretty good Shield, but she’s no Jared. And it hits him kinda hard, right then, that Jensen hasn’t heard more stories about pairs training from Jared.
Well, there’s one way to find out more.
Jensen wades through the crowd to find Katie. He waits until she turns away from chatting with another guy and slides up. “So, how is the training going with Jared?” he asks with a smile. He doesn’t bother introducing himself. He’s pretty sure she’ll recognize him, even if he is just a freshman. “How does it feel to do the body-swapping thing?”
Katie looks him up and down. “Huh. You must be Jensen.” He draws himself up a little taller. “Training’s fine,” she says shortly. “Swapping? We don’t do that. Turns out the only person he’s been able to do that with is you.”
That rocks Jensen, more than a little. Jared hadn’t mentioned anything about it. “Well,” he covers. “We’ve been friends for a long time. Maybe he just, I don’t know, knows me best? But,” he says reassuringly, “I’m sure you guys make a great team. Um, are you a couple too?” Jensen mentally slaps his forehead. Oh, very suave. Really.
“No.”
“Well, I’ve been hearing a lot about Genevieve,” he soldiers on. “I know they’ve been spending a lot of time together. Do you know her?” He fumbles for the right words, an approach that’ll encourage Katie to cut loose with another tidbit of information about Jared.
Katie cuts loose all right, says disgustedly, “You’re a fucking idiot.” She takes another swig of her drink, gives him another long, enigmatic look. “Look, Jared and I are just friends. Jared and Gen too. But how are you and Kane doing? Or is it you and Manns? Or maybe my boy Amell over there?” She jerks her chin toward where Stephen’s leaning on the wall on the other side of the common room, watching him. He nods when they look his way. “Make it official with anyone yet? Because everyone knows you’re screwing around. Everyone.”
Jensen bristles. So what if he’s hooked up a few times? It’s like the whole campus is having sex, that’s what college is for, right? Yet here’s Katie giving him shit for it? “It’s nothing serious.”
“I’ll bet.”
Jensen chugs down the rest of his beer, flashing the empty cup at Katie as an excuse to end this excruciating conversation. “Look, I gotta go. Tell Jared hey. Tell him I miss-I miss seeing him around.”
It turns out Katie’s bitchface isn’t permanent after all, but Jensen’s not sure he likes this expression any better. “I’ll tell him.” She puts a hand on his arm as he turns away. “He’d be right here if they’d let him, you know.”
“Yeah. I know.”
Then he stumbles back to the freshman dorm alone, wishing he’d never spoken to Katie. Their exchange plays on repeat in his head and it’s all so stupid. Begging for scraps of information from strangers, over-analyzing Jared’s brief texts to try to tell what’s really going on with him, the big news all kept secret. None of this would be happening if Jared hadn’t had to move out. It takes Jensen three tries to get his key in the lock, and then he bangs his shin on the desk chair in the dark, falling forward into his bed, not even bothering to shuck off his shoes or jeans. So what if Jared’s got Outlier Powers? Fuck, Jensen’s the one with a dimension-hopping mom, he should be the freak of the freshman class. God knows, if Jensen was the Swapper, he’d go and switch with Jared right now, just to have the chance to fucking see him for a minute. There’s a small corner of his brain that knows this makes no sense, but Jensen’s drunk and miserable enough to ignore it in favor of some good, old-fashioned wallowing. Then sleep.
*****
It’s December, it’s Wednesday, it’s 8 p.m., and Jensen is studying for his last exam before the end of term. That’s when the news breaks: Heyerdahl has escaped from the purportedly inescapable stasis he’d been placed in seven years ago, after his trial for terrorism, sedition, mass murder, and a dozen other heinous charges.
Jensen’s inbox is immediately slammed with emails and the phone starts ringing nonstop, but he doesn’t want to talk. He just sits in front of his computer and clicks methodically from website to website, sifting through the first official updates and the flood of random rumors. Every place he looks, there’s video footage and images from Dallas eight years ago: the legion of Powers defending against attacks by the Outliers; the wholesale slaughter of Powers and Normals alike; Jensen’s parents luring the rogue Power, Heyerdahl, into the distant desert for a final showdown, their ultimate sacrifice and Heyerdahl’s capture. Jensen clicks through each site as quickly as he can, barely registering the sound of other students gathering in the hall outside and on the quad below his window, their voices rising and falling with alarm.
There’s a knock on his door, but he ignores it.
“Jensen,” a deep voice calls. “It’s Dean Morgan.”
Jensen gets up, his joints creaking like an 80-year-old’s, and he turns the knob, opening the door to the Dean’s solemn face. Jensen hasn’t seen Morgan in years. When he was a kid, Morgan had him brought to campus, right after he lost his parents. He’d been a colleague of theirs, a friend even, and had spent a day with Jensen, talking about Alan and d’Onna, and their shared past. Jensen’d only seen the Dean in passing a few times since starting freshman year, trying to stay under the radar, just a regular student, but he remembers Morgan well from that day.
“I just wanted to personally check in on you tonight,” the Dean says. “Make sure you know the Council and rest of the community of Powers is doing everything we can right now to make sure Heyerdahl is apprehended.”
“I know, sir. Thank you for coming by so quickly when you must be busy.” Jensen doesn’t step aside to let him in.
“You’re right, I’m actually on my way to the Capitol right now with most of the other faculty,” Morgan admits. “They’ve called all of the inactive Powers back into duty for the duration of this emergency.”
Jensen has often heard that Heyerdahl was-is-one of the most powerful Kinetics in recorded history, and he’s glad to hear the Council isn’t taking him lightly, even if he no longer has an army of supporters behind him. Jensen’s tempted to volunteer to go with Morgan, but he doesn’t bother, knows his skills aren’t worth anything. Not yet, at least.
“Good luck, sir. And-” He’s not sure how it will come across, but Jensen says it anyway. “Be careful.”
Morgan nods and turns on his heel, Jensen closing the door again on the curious faces of his hallmates who’d been observing the encounter wide-eyed.
He goes back to the desk, but doesn’t get back online, just hunches over, resting his elbows on his knees and staring at his clasped hands. He’s not sure how long he sits there, only a few minutes, he thinks, before there’s another knock. He’s pretty confident it’s not the Dean again.
“Go away,” he barks.
But even as he says it, the door is swinging open and Jared’s walking in, pulling his key from the lock and kicking it closed behind him.
Jensen rises. “Are you allowed to be here?”
“Fuck ‘allowed,’” Jared says, coming right up, his hands reaching for Jensen, settling warm and firm on his shoulders. “You okay?”
And Jensen doesn’t know where the impulse comes from, but he doesn’t hesitate, just steps into Jared’s space and wraps him up in a hug, his chin barely tucking over the top of Jared’s shoulder, his hands fisting in the back of Jared’s shirt. Jared falters for a second, Jensen feels hands hover uncertain over his back, but then Jared returns the hug, squeezing hard enough to take Jensen’s breath away. They stand there for long seconds, the pulse in Jared’s neck thumping strong against Jensen’s cheek, and suddenly all of the anxiety that had been riding him over Heyerdahl’s escape melts away.
He fights the stupid little frisson in his belly that sparks when he registers the press of Jared’s broad chest and the delicious, homey smell of him. Jensen cracks one eye open to find a vague blurry haze surrounding them. “It’s going to be fine, you know,” he mutters. “They’re going to catch him.”
“I know,” Jared whispers back.
“Then why do you have a Shield up?” Jensen teases, and steps back, giving Jared’s shoulder a friendly shove, not wanting Jared to feel how Jensen’s cock is perking up, the bulge probably visible in his ratty sweatpants. Great, the minute he sees Jared after weeks apart and he has no more control over his body than Jared has of his Power. His Powers, Jensen amends. And wouldn’t that be a bitch, for Jared to accidentally swap them while Jensen’s conspicuously hard from feeling up his best friend.
Jared looks around, blushing. “Sorry. Just-” The Shield encircling them swiftly sputters and fades. “-just a stupid reaction.” He gazes everywhere but Jensen, which is just as well, because Jensen feels like his own face is burning hot. “I like what you’ve done with the place.”
Of course Jensen hasn’t changed a thing since Jared moved out, all of Jared’s 70s rock band posters still litter the walls, plastic milk crates still sit stuffed with their sports gear jumbled together. Jared hadn’t taken much at all with him, betting on the fact they would actually let him come back. But there are a few strings of tiny colored Christmas lights draped over their windowsills and lining the bunk, a red fuzzy Santa hat perched jauntily on the stuffed moose’s head Jared had hung on the wall when they moved in. “Nah. Beth and Aldis snuck in here and did all this last week.”
A small smile plays on Jared’s lips, and he plops down into his old desk chair, running his long fingers along the edge of the desk like he missed the feel of it. “So you haven’t put up the tree yet?”
Over the years at the Home, the two of them had come up with a whole slew of stupid traditions for celebrating the holidays to make up for the old ones that had been taken away. Sometimes they’d gotten the other kids involved, but their little artificial tree with Jared’s hand-made ornaments and two presents under it on Christmas morning? That was just theirs, without fail.
“Dude! Of course not,” Jensen huffs. “Can’t put up the tree without you. All the stuff’s in storage down in the basement, though. Ready to go.”
“Okay.” Jared says, grinning wider. “What about this weekend?”
“This weekend it is.”
Heyerdahl will be recaptured, Jared will move back in. It’s going to be fine. Jensen knows.
*****
Word spreads through email that the rest of exams are canceled and the semester is officially over. The campus empties out the next morning, everyone urgently heading home for the break except for a spare half-dozen or so students, including him and Jared, who have no where else to go.
By Saturday, the faculty still haven’t returned. There’s no one in the administration office to give Jared the green light to move back into the freshman dorm, so he decides to stay put, telling Jensen that Genevieve is remaining in the faculty hall during the holidays, too, and he’d feel bad leaving her all alone. Jensen sulks a bit over being abandoned for Genevieve’s sake, but sucks it up, choosing to believe what Katie told him, and that Jared’s just being a good guy. Not that it’s any of his business.
Jensen rubs sleep out of his eyes, hurrying to piss and brush his teeth and pull on a pair of jeans. Jared had texted him an hour ago, telling him to meet up at the west gate and they’d walk into town to find breakfast. But just as he’s toeing into his boots, the campus alarm klaxons erupt into a barrage of shrill sirens. The hair on the back of Jensen’s neck springs to attention, and he knows immediately, this is no drill.
He bursts out of his room and, even though he won’t start his flying classes until sophomore year, Jensen throws himself over the rail and down the stairwell anyway, barely managing to levitate himself enough not to break a leg at the bottom. He hits the ground running, pounding out the front door of the dorm and racing toward the library, where the emergency vaults are located. He’s panting, but it doesn’t feel like he takes a breath until he finally sees Jared, already there on the front steps. He’s standing with Danneel and Osric, and there’s Genevieve, and another guy Jensen doesn’t recognize. Jared waves to Jensen as he approaches.
“We’re just waiting for Adrianne and Felicia,” Danneel calls out over the sound of the sirens as soon as Jensen’s within earshot. “That’s all of us students still here on campus, any maintenance staff wouldn’t be here this early on a weekend. We’ll give them a few more minutes, but then we’ll have to head into the lock-down area inside.” She throws up a solid Shield around the whole group, and Jensen’s glad at least one senior was still on campus.
“Do we know what it is?” he asks, but his eyes lock with Jared’s, and Jensen sees that he also suspects it must have something to do with Heyerdahl.
“Hey, Jensen, right?” the other guy says, and Jensen nods. “Malik,” he says by way of introduction. “Last year we had a tornado touch down a few towns over and the alarms went off then, too. Barely enough room for everyone to scramble into the vaults.” As one, they all look up, but all they see is crisp blue sky.
Then Osric shouts, “There they are,” pointing across the quad at two figures sprinting toward them.
“Okay, that’s it. We can’t wait any longer. Let’s go,” Danneel orders, and drops her Shield as Felicia and Adrianne dash up the stairs to join the group.
But just as soon as the Shield goes down, Jensen sees his friends thrown to the ground in all directions, bowling pins under a hard strike, and simultaneously feels himself yanked into air like a marionette on strings. He tries to push back with his own Power, but he might as well be pushing against a steel wall. The klaxons overhead all cut off mid-peal, and in the sudden silence a voice he’s only heard before on television documentaries, and in his nightmares, sounds from behind them.
“Not so fast, kids,” drawls Heyerdahl. “I just need a few minutes to talk to young Mister Ackles here.”
The huge oak doors to the library fly open and Jensen is swept inside behind Heyerdahl, who strides through the main foyer and turns into the first nearby office. Jensen struggles, but can do nothing other than be pulled along, toes brushing the carpet, until Heyerdahl plasters him up against the far wall, all his muscles frozen. Through the office’s still-open door, Jensen can see Jared and the others rushing into the library, taking cover behind the reference desk. Jensen tries to scream at them to run, to wait for help, but he doesn’t have time before Heyerdahl steps up into his face, blocking everything else out, cold, sunken eyes boring a hole right through him.
“Ah, Jensen. Look how you’ve grown. You couldn’t possibly remember, but your parents introduced us when you were just a baby, when your father and I were on the Council together.” He smiles in a singularly dreadful way, the gaunt planes of his face like icy cliffs. “That was all before the more recent unpleasantness, of course.”
Jensen wants to fling himself just a few inches forward and turn that smile into pulp with his fists, wants to use his Power to rip Heyerdahl limb from limb. Hell, he’d settle for being able to spit in his face. Instead, all he can manage from underneath the pressure bearing down on his chest is to grit out, “Go fuck yourself.”
“Alas,” Heyerdahl replies, “I don’t have time for a cordial chat. All I need from you is a tiny bit of information, and then we’re done here. Perhaps a traditional monologue will serve. ”
He turns away and stalks across the office, hands clasped behind his back, addressing Jensen, but raising his voice toward the six figures still huddled together near the front doors. “As you probably know, your lovely mother’s Powers were not inborn, like ours, but derived from the amulet she brought with her when she arrived here from across the void. It’s a powerful weapon. One that defeated me once, not without cost.” He turns his head and smirks at Jensen over his shoulder. “Most of the cost borne by you.” He turns back to Jared and the others, pinning them like bugs under his gaze. “But since I am currently without many weapons to fight off my pursuers, I need it. And you are going to tell me where it is. We can do this indirectly…” Heyerdahl casually gestures and Jensen sees a row of display cases go tumbling down over the group outside, ricocheting off of Danneel’s Shield and onto the floor. “Or directly.” He turns back to Jensen and a small crack echoes in the room. Jensen screams in surprise and agony as pain rockets up his left arm. He looks down and nearly retches when he sees his pinkie twisted at an unnatural near-right angle from the rest of his hand.
Jensen closes his eyes against the pain and when he opens them again, Heyerdahl is back in his face. “I don’t have much time, Jensen,” he hisses. “Your teachers and many other foolhardy Powers are rushing here as we speak.” Jensen nearly gags again as Heyerdahl reaches up and cups Jensen’s chin, stroking a thumb across his cheekbone. “Ah, you look very much like your mother. Don’t make me ruin this pretty face, too.” Jensen can feel the press of Heyerdahl’s thumbnail against his skin. “Tell me where the amulet is, or I’ll take an eye next.”
Jensen draws a deep breath in, tries to prepare himself, when his stomach flips, dips, and suddenly he’s standing out in the library entrance, Danneel and Osric each holding an arm, yelling at him, “Don’t! Don’t!”
He blinks, can see through the door, thirty feet away, Heyerdahl with his hands on Jensen’s face, and it dawns on him what Jared’s done.
“No,” he breathes.
*****
On to Part 2