Joxer the Barbarian? (Part 1/?)
Here's the start of an interesting (well interesting idea to me) crossover story that I thought up while coming home from work this morning. I may or may not continue it past this much.
While off in the forest, foraging for edible berries for the night's supper, the would-be warrior known as Joxer the Mighty came across what appeared to be an abandoned shrine to some God that Joxer couldn't recognize right away. All that was left of the shrine were a few columns where the entrance would've been, the decaying remains of the four walls of the structure, and the altar. The altar did show less signs of decay than the rest of the shrine and lying on top of it was a somewhat small, shiny red rock.
Joxer, letting his curiosity get the better of him (again), took off his hat as he stepped into the shrine and made his way to the altar. He picked up the rock and looked at it, holding it up to the overhead sun to get a better look at it. Instead of seeing his reflection in the shiny surface of the red rock, he saw the visage of an very ancient-looking bald man with a long white beard and an eye patch over one eye. He saw that the old man was looking right at him and suddenly, Joxer's whole body felt very heavy and everything went black.
*~*~*~*
"Why do I have to be the one that has to go looking for him, Xena?" Gabrielle whined.
"Because you were the one that wanted to get rid of him so you could have some 'peace and quiet'." Xena replied while checking the position of the sun. "I'm worried about him, if he hasn't found anything really good to eat; he'd be back by now."
"Maybe he got bored and decided to leave on his trip early." Gabrielle replied.
"No, he didn't take his gear with him." Xena stated, motioning to the pile of Joxer's stuff still lying next to the log by the campfire.
"Oh, okay." Gabrielle sighed dramatically. "I guess I'll go see what trouble he's gotten himself into this time." The bard reluctantly trudged off in the same direction Joxer had left the campsite in.
About twenty minutes later, Gabrielle came across the ruins of the shrine and, being curious herself, peered over the top of one of the crumbling walls. Gasping, she saw that Joxer was sprawled on the ground in front of the altar, a shiny red rock lying beside his head. She quickly entered the shrine and went over to him.
"Joxer! Joxer! Are you all right?" She shook him, trying to revive the lanky man but to no avail. She checked his head for bumps or cuts, anything that would show how he had been knocked unconscious but she couldn’t find anything. Thankfully, she noticed, he was breathing and didn’t seem to be in severe pain.
Gabrielle quickly returned to their camp and told Xena what she had found. Together, they made their way to the abandoned shrine and were able to pick up Joxer and move him back to camp. They put him down on top of his bedroll and Gabrielle watched as Xena looked their friend over for any signs of poisoning or magic or anything that could show why he was not awake.
“Oh, Xena! I forgot something! Something I saw at the shrine! I’ll go get it!” Gabrielle ran back to the shrine and returned with the shiny red rock.
Xena took the rock and examined it closely. She held it up to the sun and saw nothing out of the ordinary.
Just then Joxer groaned and put his hand up to block the light shining in his face. As he opened his eyes, both Xena and Gabrielle could see how confused he looked.
“Joxer? Are you feeling okay?” Gabrielle asked.
Joxer just stared at her, uncomprehending.
“Joxer?” Xena asked.
Joxer looked at Xena, and she could see he recognized her but still said nothing. Gabrielle came over to where Joxer was laying on the ground, but before she could kneel down next to him, Joxer was on his feet faster than they had ever seen him move before. He then started to talk to them in some funny-sounding language that neither one of them had heard of. As he continued to talk, they both watched as their friend stared at them both and started to close and open his right eye and moving it all around. He then exclaimed something in the bizarre language he was speaking and then immediately put his hand to his mouth and looked like he was feeling his teeth. Smiling widely, he exclaimed something else to them, looking for them to reply.
“What’s wrong with him, Xena?” Gabrielle asked worriedly.
Before Xena could reply, Joxer suddenly invaded Xena’s personal space and got right up in her face. He had moved back before even Xena had time to react. He was shaking his head in a negative way while talking softly in the foreign tongue he had been using ever since he woke up.
“Xena?” He asked, pointing at the warrior princess.
Xena, after a moment, nodded and put her hand to her chest. “Xena.”
Joxer then pointed to Gabrielle and said a single word in his weird language.
“Gabrielle.” Xena stated, also pointing to Gabrielle, who looked puzzled by what was going on. “He doesn’t know who we are?” She asked.
Xena pointed to Joxer. “Joxer.” She stated.
Joxer smiled widely, almost maniacally, at Xena and shook his head.
“Joxer.” He pointed to himself and shook his head. Both Xena and Gabrielle frowned upon hearing this.
“Cohen!” He said, beating at his chest proudly with one hand.
While off in the forest, foraging for edible berries for the night's supper, the would-be warrior known as Joxer the Mighty came across what appeared to be an abandoned shrine to some God that Joxer couldn't recognize right away. All that was left of the shrine were a few columns where the entrance would've been, the decaying remains of the four walls of the structure, and the altar. The altar did show less signs of decay than the rest of the shrine and lying on top of it was a somewhat small, shiny red rock.
Joxer, letting his curiosity get the better of him (again), took off his hat as he stepped into the shrine and made his way to the altar. He picked up the rock and looked at it, holding it up to the overhead sun to get a better look at it. Instead of seeing his reflection in the shiny surface of the red rock, he saw the visage of an very ancient-looking bald man with a long white beard and an eye patch over one eye. He saw that the old man was looking right at him and suddenly, Joxer's whole body felt very heavy and everything went black.
*~*~*~*
"Why do I have to be the one that has to go looking for him, Xena?" Gabrielle whined.
"Because you were the one that wanted to get rid of him so you could have some 'peace and quiet'." Xena replied while checking the position of the sun. "I'm worried about him, if he hasn't found anything really good to eat; he'd be back by now."
"Maybe he got bored and decided to leave on his trip early." Gabrielle replied.
"No, he didn't take his gear with him." Xena stated, motioning to the pile of Joxer's stuff still lying next to the log by the campfire.
"Oh, okay." Gabrielle sighed dramatically. "I guess I'll go see what trouble he's gotten himself into this time." The bard reluctantly trudged off in the same direction Joxer had left the campsite in.
About twenty minutes later, Gabrielle came across the ruins of the shrine and, being curious herself, peered over the top of one of the crumbling walls. Gasping, she saw that Joxer was sprawled on the ground in front of the altar, a shiny red rock lying beside his head. She quickly entered the shrine and went over to him.
"Joxer! Joxer! Are you all right?" She shook him, trying to revive the lanky man but to no avail. She checked his head for bumps or cuts, anything that would show how he had been knocked unconscious but she couldn’t find anything. Thankfully, she noticed, he was breathing and didn’t seem to be in severe pain.
Gabrielle quickly returned to their camp and told Xena what she had found. Together, they made their way to the abandoned shrine and were able to pick up Joxer and move him back to camp. They put him down on top of his bedroll and Gabrielle watched as Xena looked their friend over for any signs of poisoning or magic or anything that could show why he was not awake.
“Oh, Xena! I forgot something! Something I saw at the shrine! I’ll go get it!” Gabrielle ran back to the shrine and returned with the shiny red rock.
Xena took the rock and examined it closely. She held it up to the sun and saw nothing out of the ordinary.
Just then Joxer groaned and put his hand up to block the light shining in his face. As he opened his eyes, both Xena and Gabrielle could see how confused he looked.
“Joxer? Are you feeling okay?” Gabrielle asked.
Joxer just stared at her, uncomprehending.
“Joxer?” Xena asked.
Joxer looked at Xena, and she could see he recognized her but still said nothing. Gabrielle came over to where Joxer was laying on the ground, but before she could kneel down next to him, Joxer was on his feet faster than they had ever seen him move before. He then started to talk to them in some funny-sounding language that neither one of them had heard of. As he continued to talk, they both watched as their friend stared at them both and started to close and open his right eye and moving it all around. He then exclaimed something in the bizarre language he was speaking and then immediately put his hand to his mouth and looked like he was feeling his teeth. Smiling widely, he exclaimed something else to them, looking for them to reply.
“What’s wrong with him, Xena?” Gabrielle asked worriedly.
Before Xena could reply, Joxer suddenly invaded Xena’s personal space and got right up in her face. He had moved back before even Xena had time to react. He was shaking his head in a negative way while talking softly in the foreign tongue he had been using ever since he woke up.
“Xena?” He asked, pointing at the warrior princess.
Xena, after a moment, nodded and put her hand to her chest. “Xena.”
Joxer then pointed to Gabrielle and said a single word in his weird language.
“Gabrielle.” Xena stated, also pointing to Gabrielle, who looked puzzled by what was going on. “He doesn’t know who we are?” She asked.
Xena pointed to Joxer. “Joxer.” She stated.
Joxer smiled widely, almost maniacally, at Xena and shook his head.
“Joxer.” He pointed to himself and shook his head. Both Xena and Gabrielle frowned upon hearing this.
“Cohen!” He said, beating at his chest proudly with one hand.