Raaant
Ahh I have been feeling so restless. There's simply too much I want to do at the same time to the point that I do not quite know what it is I want to do for sure. I want to cosplay more. I want to write more into my stories. The problem is... for cosplay, there's so many I want to do and I cannot single one out that I want to do more than the others. For writing, I am also indecisive on which one I most want to work on. Though, in truth, I have singled out that I'm most likely to have MOST fun cosplaying Shuichi again at a bigger convention than that of before. (which was really mostly me walking around the mall and attracting a lot of pervs who thought I was a hooker lol) And as for writing, I MOST need to finish Firefly..though I think I most want to write in Blood Legacy at the moment. I keep coming up with many ideas for it, but I can't seem to get myself to work on it lol. I feel bad not finishing up with Firefly first. All of that aside anyways, I've been busy, so, when I finally do have that free time, I simply don't want to do any of that stuff. ~_~ so tired. Think I'm sick too cuz I keep going outside and playing with the cats. Silly me. I know I'm allergic.
My B-day is coming up soon too. Dunno wtf to do when that comes. All the things I want seem so silly. I want manga and anime as gifts..and yet I tell everyone "I don't know" because I feel bad asking for things they think of as childish and, likely, wasteful. It's why I pretty much never spend on myself these days. I feel bad buying the things I like..because they're merely hobbies and not really USEFUL. As if I'm going to make a life out of cosplay and being a total dork XD. Though I'd love to, but fact is... Hii-chan doesn't have that super model good looks that those on the scene have. That and I'm too much of a wuss to compete. Besides, my costumes are done by my mom and I. It's not all my work ever. I highly doubt I could do a costume on my own. Well.. I did once..and honestly, when I look back on it, I don't know how I did. But Raenef and Kuja were done all by myself along with the majority of Zhang He. But if she doesn't stand over me and play boss, I tend to get lazy and not do it XDD Sad, I know.
My B-day is coming up soon too. Dunno wtf to do when that comes. All the things I want seem so silly. I want manga and anime as gifts..and yet I tell everyone "I don't know" because I feel bad asking for things they think of as childish and, likely, wasteful. It's why I pretty much never spend on myself these days. I feel bad buying the things I like..because they're merely hobbies and not really USEFUL. As if I'm going to make a life out of cosplay and being a total dork XD. Though I'd love to, but fact is... Hii-chan doesn't have that super model good looks that those on the scene have. That and I'm too much of a wuss to compete. Besides, my costumes are done by my mom and I. It's not all my work ever. I highly doubt I could do a costume on my own. Well.. I did once..and honestly, when I look back on it, I don't know how I did. But Raenef and Kuja were done all by myself along with the majority of Zhang He. But if she doesn't stand over me and play boss, I tend to get lazy and not do it XDD Sad, I know.