(no subject)
Hello out there. :) I keep meaning to post, but RL is always sweeping me away, mostly to work and back, and I never feel quite like I'm in a headspace for anything but work or resting up to go back to work. It's not really conducive to fandom space.
This last week in particular was rough. My new supervisor, who started right after Thanksgiving, announced that she is leaving for a (frankly, from my perspective) much better job. I had already decided that she was the kind of professional I would like to be myself, and had been looking forward to having her there as a mentor of sorts. She is also amazing to work with; unlike most of my coworkers, she understands my job and appreciates the work I do. I don't have to constantly teach (and reteach ad nauseum) her things about technology, which means we are able to collaborate on projects quickly and fluently. And most importantly, she shielded me from the whims and inappropriate demands from one of the other directors, which made my job way less stressful and has let me make real progress on my various projects.
So I'm really bummed that she's leaving. Almost to the point where I'm taking it as a sign that it's time for me to go too. I probably won't, but a lot of dissatisfactions are rising up just now, and I'm trying to make sense of them. Ultimately it kind of boils down to a culture mismatch. My workplace is a synagogue, so a certain level of wholesomeness is to be expected. But I find it kind of aggressively wholesome, with some cult of nice thrown in, and a lot of opportunity for some people to clothe their passive-aggressive tendencies in the rhetoric of "the values of our community." I don't know if that makes sense. I feel like I'm generally a well-intentioned person, but I'm also sardonic enough that I'm just not going to fit in here ever, and it's a little exhausting to go with the flow all the time.
And work feels like a microcosm of Portland, tbh. I wonder if I just don't need to be someplace where the overall culture is a little different, maybe where there's a little more diversity, so you don't always run into people who have the exact same assumptions and values. Someone told me there is a big lesbian community in Santa Fe. Does anyone know if that's good place to live?
Anyway, that's work. I actually am going to my second job tonight (which is mostly kind of fun and a good outlet), but in the meantime I realized I can try to detox a little. I really hate how DW doesn't let you page back more than two weeks when you're trying to catch up on posts. But I guess that's motivation to get on here more often.
One question: How is Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. so consistently amazing? I just watched the 100th ep and it made me cry at least twice. Kind of afraid of what's next. Yoyo keeps doing the foreshadowing thing.... I'm also nearing the end of a Brooklyn 99 rewatch that is delightful. And in January I mainlined all 6 seasons of White Collar, which was love. Next I have to decide between the new season of Shannara, the new season of Jessica Jones, catching up on Doctor Who, and really getting started on SW: Rebels.
I've posted some fic recently, and got some awesome gifts in some exchanges, so I'll share those soon, maybe today. It's funny, I don't always have the patience for all the (fairly minimal) coding that takes.
Things I'm looking forward to:
- possibly getting a new planner
- my parents visiting in April (we're spending a week in Canada)
- Bitchin Party, just before my parents get here
- seeing Semiramide on Wednesday
- rewatching Black Panther
I should also mention, in January my cat got sick and pretty soon after I had to help her go to rest. She wasn't the world's worst roommate, but sometimes she liked to audition for the part, and under all the aggravation I kind of respected her for it. Either way, my place feels very empty without her underfoot and meowing during my TV shows, and really hilariously glaring balefully at all my friends, and curling up by me wherever I went. Rest in peace, stupid cat.
This entry was originally posted at https://desertport.dreamwidth.org/191430.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
This last week in particular was rough. My new supervisor, who started right after Thanksgiving, announced that she is leaving for a (frankly, from my perspective) much better job. I had already decided that she was the kind of professional I would like to be myself, and had been looking forward to having her there as a mentor of sorts. She is also amazing to work with; unlike most of my coworkers, she understands my job and appreciates the work I do. I don't have to constantly teach (and reteach ad nauseum) her things about technology, which means we are able to collaborate on projects quickly and fluently. And most importantly, she shielded me from the whims and inappropriate demands from one of the other directors, which made my job way less stressful and has let me make real progress on my various projects.
So I'm really bummed that she's leaving. Almost to the point where I'm taking it as a sign that it's time for me to go too. I probably won't, but a lot of dissatisfactions are rising up just now, and I'm trying to make sense of them. Ultimately it kind of boils down to a culture mismatch. My workplace is a synagogue, so a certain level of wholesomeness is to be expected. But I find it kind of aggressively wholesome, with some cult of nice thrown in, and a lot of opportunity for some people to clothe their passive-aggressive tendencies in the rhetoric of "the values of our community." I don't know if that makes sense. I feel like I'm generally a well-intentioned person, but I'm also sardonic enough that I'm just not going to fit in here ever, and it's a little exhausting to go with the flow all the time.
And work feels like a microcosm of Portland, tbh. I wonder if I just don't need to be someplace where the overall culture is a little different, maybe where there's a little more diversity, so you don't always run into people who have the exact same assumptions and values. Someone told me there is a big lesbian community in Santa Fe. Does anyone know if that's good place to live?
Anyway, that's work. I actually am going to my second job tonight (which is mostly kind of fun and a good outlet), but in the meantime I realized I can try to detox a little. I really hate how DW doesn't let you page back more than two weeks when you're trying to catch up on posts. But I guess that's motivation to get on here more often.
One question: How is Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. so consistently amazing? I just watched the 100th ep and it made me cry at least twice. Kind of afraid of what's next. Yoyo keeps doing the foreshadowing thing.... I'm also nearing the end of a Brooklyn 99 rewatch that is delightful. And in January I mainlined all 6 seasons of White Collar, which was love. Next I have to decide between the new season of Shannara, the new season of Jessica Jones, catching up on Doctor Who, and really getting started on SW: Rebels.
I've posted some fic recently, and got some awesome gifts in some exchanges, so I'll share those soon, maybe today. It's funny, I don't always have the patience for all the (fairly minimal) coding that takes.
Things I'm looking forward to:
- possibly getting a new planner
- my parents visiting in April (we're spending a week in Canada)
- Bitchin Party, just before my parents get here
- seeing Semiramide on Wednesday
- rewatching Black Panther
I should also mention, in January my cat got sick and pretty soon after I had to help her go to rest. She wasn't the world's worst roommate, but sometimes she liked to audition for the part, and under all the aggravation I kind of respected her for it. Either way, my place feels very empty without her underfoot and meowing during my TV shows, and really hilariously glaring balefully at all my friends, and curling up by me wherever I went. Rest in peace, stupid cat.
This entry was originally posted at https://desertport.dreamwidth.org/191430.html. Please comment there using OpenID.