Comments | determinedjay: Oooh my mother can IRK me at times!

determinedjay

Oooh my mother can IRK me at times!

Jun 22, 2006 09:25

I do not know if I am wrong about feeling this way or not but this is the deal.

I have been telling my mother for about a MONTH now that I want to go to Houston for the 4th of July weekend with my best friend. The reason I have been telling her is because that same exact weekend, she wanted to come to New Orleans to spend some of her vacation time ( Read more... )

4th of july, essence, houston

Comments 4

cherriboo June 22 2006, 18:28:24 UTC

No you are not being selfish. Sometimes parents don't understand how stressful college is and how much we actually need a break. My parents wanted me to come home right after graduation but I didn't want too. I felt I had deserved to do what I wanted for once. You'll be able to spend time with her. She just wants you to come when she wants you too. That's how mothers are. LOL!

teenhealthdiva June 23 2006, 14:53:04 UTC

hope i'm not too harsh but ( ... )

determinedjay June 23 2006, 16:53:35 UTC

Thanks for the advice! It makes me feel a whole lot better . . but yeah, my moms had me when she was very young so in a sense, she didn't have any "motherly" skills when I was born . . hence, it is hard for her to see me move on and live my life for some reason . . as you said, she wants me to stay her "lil baby" to a certain extent and cater to her SO MUCH . . I don't get it at times.

teenhealthdiva June 23 2006, 19:59:05 UTC

being a young mother (as was i) is not an excuse for guilt-tripping adult children. i was also young with ryan and i made it my priority to spend as much time with him as i could. now that he's a teenager, our direct time lessens because he prefers his friends. i'm sure the time together will lessen more when he leaves for college. and it will all be appropriate because i won't be trying to make up for any lost time.

my advice is to love your children as children. make time for them when they need it most. this is the primary reason why i'm leaving my job--so that i don't regret missing my children grow up.

it's a tough situation. but not an insurmountable one. i'm sure your mom loves you very very much. but you do have to convey to her the importance of you having and NEEDING your own time.

you guys will be fine.