I just saw Frank for the last time here. It was nice. We made out a bit. and a little bit of other stuff but not much. He had to go do something for his job
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When you say "I felt like I had come home, even though I hadn’t ever been there before/wasn’t born here", you're echoing my exact feelings as well. I also kind of envy you for having a specific city with which you are so in love. I've loved every city in Germany I have been to the same, so even though I love it there, I have no idea what city I would most want to live in. Not wanting to go back to your family doesn't make you a bad person either. I didn't want to go back to the states either when I was in Konstanz last year, and stopped speaking English for 2 months once I did go back to the states.
Good luck with any reverse culture shock, and of course good luck finding a way back there again soon! It will always be there for you to go back to, so don't feel like part of yourself is permanently gone.
There's nothing wrong with this feeling. Family or not, some places just... jive with you a lot better. Any place where you feel like you can be yourself, to just be, seems like a good place to call "home". Ed Kowalczyk said it best: "Paradise is not a place you go, it's the place where you are, fully accepted."
Now you know (much more-fully) how *I* feel about the Land of My Birth (otherwise known as LA). Even though I've been to almost every continent on this planet and love many many places where I would want to stay for far longer than 3 weeks (like, oh, Italy, Australia, Germany, etc. etc.),.... I feel the same way about So Cal in general and LA in particular the way you feel about Berlin.
I know we dont know each other and I was just lurking around bc of your awesome pics with the guys from Rammstein. But I can understand how you feel 100 percent. I went to New York City two weeks ago so I could stay with a friend while I waited for the Rammstein concert in New Jersey. I have to say, I feel more at home there than I do in NC where I was born and raised. Love my family to death dont get me wrong, but I felt so much more at home in NY than I do down here. I plan to try and find a place in Brooklyn one day if I ever get up enough money to go up there again and look for a job.
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I also kind of envy you for having a specific city with which you are so in love. I've loved every city in Germany I have been to the same, so even though I love it there, I have no idea what city I would most want to live in.
Not wanting to go back to your family doesn't make you a bad person either. I didn't want to go back to the states either when I was in Konstanz last year, and stopped speaking English for 2 months once I did go back to the states.
Good luck with any reverse culture shock, and of course good luck finding a way back there again soon! It will always be there for you to go back to, so don't feel like part of yourself is permanently gone.
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Briefly weighing in here a bit to say....
Now you know (much more-fully) how *I* feel about the Land of My Birth (otherwise known as LA). Even though I've been to almost every continent on this planet and love many many places where I would want to stay for far longer than 3 weeks (like, oh, Italy, Australia, Germany, etc. etc.),.... I feel the same way about So Cal in general and LA in particular the way you feel about Berlin.
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If you can ever afford a trip to Germany, I highly suggest it. It's just so wonderful there.
Good luck on your journey to hopefully finding a home in NY :) I'm sure if you want it badly enough, you'll get there.
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