Sometimes I get this really awful feeling that we're just fooling ourselves and biding time until something happens that'll make us enemies. And it scares me.
I don't even know. Yeah, I guess. Or maybe it won't matter, maybe even if you do stay the same it won't make a difference in the end because I can't be neutral and I can't pick your side and . . .
It's stupid. It's a stupid thing to worry about. Not like it helps anything for me to worry about it anyway. Forget it.
I can't forget it, I think about it every day. I'm glad you can't pick my side, I would feel terrible if you did. But in the end if I have the chance to help someone I couldn't have helped before then dying for that isn't so bad. I wouldn't be able to fight back when the time came anyway, and isn't that the purpose? To help those we can even at our own cost? Fallen or not I''d still like to do that.
I know all that. I do. It's just . . . I want to believe you're different than the rest of them. I really, really do. And sometimes I even manage to believe it. It's just sometimes I can't manage it 'cause I start wondering what makes you so different.
I should have more faith in you than that. I'm sorry.
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. . . you know what never mind, forget it. It's dumb.
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It's stupid. It's a stupid thing to worry about. Not like it helps anything for me to worry about it anyway. Forget it.
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I should have more faith in you than that. I'm sorry.
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