Application for *coughhirecough* membership

[mathisnotacrime]

Fill this out to the best of your ability in a comment to this entry. Comments will be screened to protect the privacy of the villains deviants. Membership approval is dependent on this application.

Your name:

Literary source:

What makes you a criminal deviant?

Who can vouch for you? (We are aware the first influx of applicants are likely to

Comments

[hellflowsover]

Your name: Acheron Hades.
Literary source: Jasper Fforde's The Eyre Affair. Brief cameos in a few of the sequels.
What makes you a criminal deviant? I have always drawn my influence from committing base deeds. I became so adept at them that I rose-- or fell, if you prefer-- to the status of the third most wanted criminal in the world. I am a well-seasoned and extremely successful thief, extortionist, terrorist, torturer, and murderer. (Victim list upon request.)
Who can vouch for you? (We are aware the first influx of applicants are likely to be a circle jerk. We will accept that.)
-Thursday Next (thursdayn).
-Felix Tabularasa (facelessfelix)
-Adrian Lush (adrianlush) (media personality who has followed my career)
-Evan Rosier (typist note: longshot, but possibly) (thorny_beauty)
-Any of my former victims, several of whom reside in desperatefans.
Is there anything else the High Table should know?My crimes and the means in which I commit them are generally magnificent, highly unusual, and, if I may say so myself, rather ingenious

[mathisnotacrime]

I am quite impressed with your application, and would be pleased to have you at my side, Doctor. Please accept your appointment here.

I find your Degeneracy for Fun and Profit to be a most insightful book, incidentally.

[mathisnotacrime]

Additionally, I would be most interested in your...list.

[hellflowsover]

Thank you, Professor. I look forward to working with you.

You're enjoying my Degeneracy for Pleasure and Profit? I'm terribly flattered!

I'll have my typist prepare a copy of my list straightaway.

Typist: You want me to list 44 murder victims alone, not including tortures? You people really are evil.

[_l_malfoy]

Your name: Lucius Malfoy

Literary source: *sneers* Harry Potter

What makes you a criminal deviant? I am part of...well, I suppose you would call it a wizarding terrorist group, working under the command of the immortal Lord Voldemort. I barely escaped prison after his disappearance, unlike the rest of them, by lying my arse off to the authorities. Murder, torture, mind control... you name it, I've done it.

Who can vouch for you? Oh, anyone who has ever met me, I should think.

Is there anything else the High Table should know? I think not.

[mathisnotacrime]

I am sorry, sir, but a man in my position must be careful of men who may threaten his power, and from what little my sources tell me, you are exactly that sort of threat. I do hope you'll understand I will not subscribe to "keep...your enemies closer" in this, my haven.

[punjab_you]

Your name: Erik

Literary source: The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux.

What makes you a criminal deviant? If you'd like me to give you a list of people I've murdered, too bad, because I shan't. I am certain you've heard of the little incident with the chandelier and the screaming operagoers and the crushed concierge? That should be enough, I'd think.

Who can vouch for you? (We are aware the first influx of applicants are likely to be a circle jerk. We will accept that.) Well, you recommended I join.

Is there anything else the High Table should know? I'm a genius--in fact, when compared to me, Mozart looks a bit of a dullard.

[mathisnotacrime]

Indeed, I invited you, and I am impressed with your accomplishments, but you understand in the event of any emergency we should like a reference to torture for your folly or whereabouts ensure your dedication.

I will return with your acceptance letter briefly, being that my secretary has painted herself into a technical corner. I would still appreciate a reference.

[mathisnotacrime]

Here you are, M. le ghost. Forgive the delay.

Please reply with your reference at your convenience.

[punjab_you]

Er... nadirkhan knows all about my various crimes, as does thechorusgirl, although she prefers not to think about them. nadirkhan is probably your best bet.

Regards.

O.G.

Typist: Is that what I was supposed to say, or do I need them to write a note for him? ^^