Tokio Hotel: Dying Beneath Me
Title: Dying Beneath Me
Genre: Slash
Characters: Bill Kaulitz
Pairing: Implied Bill/Tom
Rating: PG
Category: Songfic, Romance, Angst
Words: 806
Warning: None
Summary: And all I can feel is you dying beneath me
Note: Thanks to my baby cousin Reezy for letting me use her song. :D
Days go by and I still think about you
Don't know what really went wrong.
Bill was perched in a bay window, watching the ocean roll in over the sand. There was a tattered notebook open in his lap. The words were inside him, but the page was blank. He wasn’t sure he could pen them, knowing he’d never send them.
Daylight turned so cold and dark
I don't know where I belong.
Staring out the window, tears fell from his eyes. The small drops of moisture landed on the paper of the notebook, splotching it here and there. Bill watched the sun setting over the ocean. It was so beautiful. He wished someone was there with him to admire it.
Hour by hour, day by day
One week, one month, one year away
It’d been a month since he’d been told things were just not the same anymore; it wasn’t working. There was someone else. Someone different. Someone not Bill. He sighed, the waves still crashing, uncaring of his pain. Glancing down at the empty page he wrote.
And all I can feel is you dying beneath me.
All I can feel is you dying to reach me.
Remembering days of the past, his pen stopped. He squeezed his eyes shut. Images of brown eyes, pink lips, calloused hands dancing through his mind. Taking deep breaths, he dropped his pen back to the paper, more tears flowing.
When your world comes crashing down
And you feel all alone.
Limbs entwined, soft kisses, midnight conversations about nothing. Bill ripped the page out of the notebook crumbling it and tossing it onto the floor. He dropped his forehead against the warm glass of the window. The unknowing ocean still slapping happily at the coarse sand. He threw the notebook to the ground and hugged his knees to his chest, burying his face against them.
Don’t think I will come back to you
I will already be gone
The memories wouldn’t leave. Hours of sitting together, wordless. Cuddling in the dark. Nightmares soothed with pets and caresses. Bill took a deep breath, he was drowning in his own memories and no one could save him but the person who was holding him under.
I'm at a loss of words
Leaving me was pleasing her
Darling, there's nothing to say
“I just can’t do this anymore. I love you, but, I love her too. I need to see where this goes...” Bill bit his lip as the words slammed through him with more force than he thought words could have. It was like he was back in the moment, standing against the side of the tourbus, hearing words he never wanted to hear from the one person that meant everything to him. He hugged his knees harder.
I gave my all to you
You gave me part of you
Darling, you left me this way
Tears were soaking through the thin cotton bottoms. Bill was suffocating. His lungs felt like they were in a vice grip and no amount of breathing could get enough oxygen inside them to breathe. He lifted his eyes to the window; the sky was beginning to change colours. The faint orange and pink of evening tinting the sky. A storm was brewing far off in the distance, the blue areas of sky already dark grey. Bill welcomed it, wanting a visual for the turmoil inside him.
His body shook, his breathing uneven, as he tried to fight the sorrow burning within. He’d never felt so lost. Everything Bill had to offer wasn’t enough to keep them happy. Sweaty bodies, panting. Slick skin rubbing together. Love. Bill shook his head, he didn’t want to remember, but the memories kept filling him like a poison.
And now you're sitting there...
Hour by hour, day by day,
One week, one month, one year away
Bill stood up, stumbling a couple steps, trying to gain his balance. The walls were closing in on him. With quick, long strides he shoved open the French doors leading to the balcony. He needed air. Palms flat on the railing, he gulped the salty air greedily. His body was on fire, skin itching. He needed to be touched by calloused fingers, held by strong arms. He needed comfort he wasn’t likely to get.
And all you can feel is that you died beneath me.
All you can feel is that you died to reach me.
His legs gave out and he dropped roughly to the floor of the balcony. Bill slammed his fist into the hard stone. He winced; it was surely going to be bruised later. He glared at the ocean with misty eyes. Swallowing, he whispered into the twilight.
All I can feel is that you died to love me.
All I can feel is that you died without me.
-Jax-
Genre: Slash
Characters: Bill Kaulitz
Pairing: Implied Bill/Tom
Rating: PG
Category: Songfic, Romance, Angst
Words: 806
Warning: None
Summary: And all I can feel is you dying beneath me
Note: Thanks to my baby cousin Reezy for letting me use her song. :D
Days go by and I still think about you
Don't know what really went wrong.
Bill was perched in a bay window, watching the ocean roll in over the sand. There was a tattered notebook open in his lap. The words were inside him, but the page was blank. He wasn’t sure he could pen them, knowing he’d never send them.
Daylight turned so cold and dark
I don't know where I belong.
Staring out the window, tears fell from his eyes. The small drops of moisture landed on the paper of the notebook, splotching it here and there. Bill watched the sun setting over the ocean. It was so beautiful. He wished someone was there with him to admire it.
Hour by hour, day by day
One week, one month, one year away
It’d been a month since he’d been told things were just not the same anymore; it wasn’t working. There was someone else. Someone different. Someone not Bill. He sighed, the waves still crashing, uncaring of his pain. Glancing down at the empty page he wrote.
And all I can feel is you dying beneath me.
All I can feel is you dying to reach me.
Remembering days of the past, his pen stopped. He squeezed his eyes shut. Images of brown eyes, pink lips, calloused hands dancing through his mind. Taking deep breaths, he dropped his pen back to the paper, more tears flowing.
When your world comes crashing down
And you feel all alone.
Limbs entwined, soft kisses, midnight conversations about nothing. Bill ripped the page out of the notebook crumbling it and tossing it onto the floor. He dropped his forehead against the warm glass of the window. The unknowing ocean still slapping happily at the coarse sand. He threw the notebook to the ground and hugged his knees to his chest, burying his face against them.
Don’t think I will come back to you
I will already be gone
The memories wouldn’t leave. Hours of sitting together, wordless. Cuddling in the dark. Nightmares soothed with pets and caresses. Bill took a deep breath, he was drowning in his own memories and no one could save him but the person who was holding him under.
I'm at a loss of words
Leaving me was pleasing her
Darling, there's nothing to say
“I just can’t do this anymore. I love you, but, I love her too. I need to see where this goes...” Bill bit his lip as the words slammed through him with more force than he thought words could have. It was like he was back in the moment, standing against the side of the tourbus, hearing words he never wanted to hear from the one person that meant everything to him. He hugged his knees harder.
I gave my all to you
You gave me part of you
Darling, you left me this way
Tears were soaking through the thin cotton bottoms. Bill was suffocating. His lungs felt like they were in a vice grip and no amount of breathing could get enough oxygen inside them to breathe. He lifted his eyes to the window; the sky was beginning to change colours. The faint orange and pink of evening tinting the sky. A storm was brewing far off in the distance, the blue areas of sky already dark grey. Bill welcomed it, wanting a visual for the turmoil inside him.
His body shook, his breathing uneven, as he tried to fight the sorrow burning within. He’d never felt so lost. Everything Bill had to offer wasn’t enough to keep them happy. Sweaty bodies, panting. Slick skin rubbing together. Love. Bill shook his head, he didn’t want to remember, but the memories kept filling him like a poison.
And now you're sitting there...
Hour by hour, day by day,
One week, one month, one year away
Bill stood up, stumbling a couple steps, trying to gain his balance. The walls were closing in on him. With quick, long strides he shoved open the French doors leading to the balcony. He needed air. Palms flat on the railing, he gulped the salty air greedily. His body was on fire, skin itching. He needed to be touched by calloused fingers, held by strong arms. He needed comfort he wasn’t likely to get.
And all you can feel is that you died beneath me.
All you can feel is that you died to reach me.
His legs gave out and he dropped roughly to the floor of the balcony. Bill slammed his fist into the hard stone. He winced; it was surely going to be bruised later. He glared at the ocean with misty eyes. Swallowing, he whispered into the twilight.
All I can feel is that you died to love me.
All I can feel is that you died without me.
-Jax-