Our Great Leader Maachin
...so like, Goseki and his broken nose; Kawai and his broken arm; Tsukada and his broken leg. xD; Has Tottsu ever accidentally mutilated himself like that? I'm inclined to think not, because he's Tottsu, but he sort of used to be a retardedly hyper kid, right?
silver_lined wanted something featuring Yonehana and Tsukada. 8D They used to be Futurama and Futurama Jr. before I knew better. So, uh. :3 Anyway.
% + % + %
♥ in sickness and in health
Bit by bit, Tsukada Ryoichi became aware of somebody calling his name. Several somebodies, in fact.
"Tsuka-chan~" That was Totsuka.
"Tsuka-chan." Goseki.
"Hey, Tsukada." ...somebody else. "Oi." Okay, Kawai.
"Tsukatard. Your attention if you would be so kind." ...Yara. Definitely Yara.
Tsukada forced a smile, cracking his eyes open to squint against the room's halogen lights. "Uh. Hey guys," he croaked, voice reedy and thin. There was a tic in his left cheek, but that was okay. He kept smiling, squinting a little. "What's up?"
"Your temperature," Kawai informed him, leaning over the back of the couch and waving an Arashi uchiwa in Tsukada's face to make his point. Indeed, Tsukada shivered -- and it wasn't because Jun was hot. "You're disgusting and contagious. Go home before you kill us all."
"But--"
"Before you kill the weak ones," Yara corrected, giving Kawai a superior look.
"~with worry," Totsuka said apologetically. "There's nobody here to look after you; you're the only one of us who can make chicken soup as good as your mother."
Yara's smile turned gracious. "How about if I take you home."
Before Tsukada could decline in propriety (or terror), smile wavering, Yonehana objected: "Yaracchi, your motorbike's about the furthest thing from first class hospital cover there is."
"He'll get chilled," said Totsuka.
"He'll fall off," said Goseki.
"He'll die," said Kawai.
Tsukada fought his smile back on. "Guys, guys," he laughed hoarsely. "I'm not--" Behind his facemask, he dissolved into coughs. "Not going to d--"
Goseki gave him a pointed look. "Tsuka-chan. I trust Yaracchi as much as the next guy over--"
"No you don't," said Yone, grinning. "You trust him more."
"He likes me," Goseki diverted, shrugging as if Yara wasn't there.
"Oi."
"He likes me too," Yonehana chuckled, "but you don't see me betting my life on the fact."
"I'll kill you, Yone," Yara frowned.
"I'd like to see you try. Again. Remember what happened last time?"
Goseki ignored them both as Tsukada's shoulders shook with the effort of not coughing while the exchange went on. "Tsuka-chan," Goseki reiterated: "You're going home."
Tsukada shook his head stubbornly, pushing himself up from the couch. He'd worked through worse back when he'd done competitive gym after all. "No, I'm good..."
Shamelessly, Yara beat Kawai to the newly-vacated seat, stretching out. Yonehana gave him a Look.
"...oh hey!" Yara said after a moment, with articulated melodrama.
Yonehana grinned, crossing his arms. "Oh! What is it, Yaracchi?" he asked equally loudly. "Have you forgotten something?"
Discreetly, Kawai shuffled around to put Goseki between himself and the Musical Academy pair. Totsuka was already there.
"Why, yes," Yara continued, looking up at the ceiling. "You know who isn't here today?"
"Oh! Tell us who!"
"It's Our Great Leader, Machida Shingo."
Tsukada leaned against the drink station, brows knit in morbid trepidation. He hoped he was hallucinating, but a pinch sadly produced nothing more than needly pain and goosebumps.
"Oh dear!" Yonehana continued, looking right at Tsukada and grinning. The Junior's glassy eyes apparently perturbed him not at all. "Whatever is the matter with him, Yaraemon?"
"Bastard," Yara said.
Unfazed, Yonehana sat himself on the end of the couch. "Please continue."
"Fine. It seems that he is sick! He is in the hospital today, Tsuyo-chan!"
Tsukada felt a wave of unease then, that had nothing to do with his illness. Everyone knew that Yonehana's mother was the only one who called him that...
Yonehana cleared his throat. "What terrible news! That Young Tsukada. I wonder if he thinks he's tougher than Our Great Leader Maachin! The hospital is for sick people, after all."
And suddenly Yara's lifespan was the least of Tsukada's worries. "I'm not-- I'm... But... Koichi-san also... I should..." He looked around desperately, but received no help.
"Sorry, man." Kawai made a warding x out of his index fingers, "I'm with them." Totsuka tactfully kept mum.
The world swam a bit.
"Our beloved walking skeleton's sick for about 90% of any given year anyway," Yara sniffed. "He can't be helped."
Yonehana nodded. "And has lines to deliver. All you've got in today's scene is a dance sequence. Which you already know. Tsuka-chan." The acrobatic akuma smiled over his best upward gaze. "Game over. Give it up."
Tsukada croaked. ". . . they said you mellowed out!"
"Who said that again?" Yonehana stuck a pinky in his ear, feigning deafness. "Oh~ if I'm not mistaken, it was Yaracchi and your own Goseki-kun."
Yonehana Tsuyoshi was rarely mistaken. Or if he was, nobody said so. Yara just grinned as Goseki fished around for his car keys.
"Right..." Tsukada said weakly, sagging. "Alright."
:::
"Hey?" Akiyama blinked, returning to the break room with seven bowls of takeaway ramen like the packhorse he was. He looked around the room. It didn't have seven people in it. "How suspicious. Did ABC take an impromptu group excursion to the bathroom or something, this fine lunch hour?"
"Or something," Yara said disdainfully. "Tsukada and his germs are on the way home. Gocchi offered to drive." Kawai and Totsuka had decided to take a ride with for the hell of it. (Not because it was preferable to being stuck around Yone and Yara when the senpai were in certain moods.)
"Ahh," Akiyama said. "That's disappointing."
"Because you'll miss their company, of course."
"Of course," Akiyama smiled broadly, opening one bag of sealed ramen bowls. "Why else?"
"If it's you, Akki, nobody wants to know."
"That's harsh, Yaracchi," Yonehana grinned. He approached the table with a sharkish air perfected from years of Yara's friendship, and seized a bowl of his own. "Harsh and hypocritical."
"Shut up."
"Oh well. Less men more share," Akiyama shrugged, graciously indicating the four spare meals.
"Good," Yara said. He split his chopsticks without ceremony. "I'm starving."
"Yaracchi needs his food," Yonehana grinned, digging in as well. "He's still growing after all."
"I'll kill you."
"You're all talk."
"...this seventh bowl," Akiyama mused; "maybe we should take it to Maachin."
"That's considerate," Yonehana said. "He does always say hospital food's insubstantial."
"Yeah..."
Yara snerked. "What, just one bowl? That bottomless pit'll need at least three." Imperviously, he eyed Akiyama.
Who looked at Yonehana.
Who glanced at Yara, then back to Akki.
"Alright, alright," Akiyama said laboriously. "I'll go take them over, but pay up."
Yara slid 850 yen across the table. "There."
"You're too kind," Yonehana smiled, and put in a little extra to pay for a fourth bowl 'from Koichi' as well.
Maachin is always dying. xD
silver_lined wanted something featuring Yonehana and Tsukada. 8D They used to be Futurama and Futurama Jr. before I knew better. So, uh. :3 Anyway.
% + % + %
♥ in sickness and in health
Bit by bit, Tsukada Ryoichi became aware of somebody calling his name. Several somebodies, in fact.
"Tsuka-chan~" That was Totsuka.
"Tsuka-chan." Goseki.
"Hey, Tsukada." ...somebody else. "Oi." Okay, Kawai.
"Tsukatard. Your attention if you would be so kind." ...Yara. Definitely Yara.
Tsukada forced a smile, cracking his eyes open to squint against the room's halogen lights. "Uh. Hey guys," he croaked, voice reedy and thin. There was a tic in his left cheek, but that was okay. He kept smiling, squinting a little. "What's up?"
"Your temperature," Kawai informed him, leaning over the back of the couch and waving an Arashi uchiwa in Tsukada's face to make his point. Indeed, Tsukada shivered -- and it wasn't because Jun was hot. "You're disgusting and contagious. Go home before you kill us all."
"But--"
"Before you kill the weak ones," Yara corrected, giving Kawai a superior look.
"~with worry," Totsuka said apologetically. "There's nobody here to look after you; you're the only one of us who can make chicken soup as good as your mother."
Yara's smile turned gracious. "How about if I take you home."
Before Tsukada could decline in propriety (or terror), smile wavering, Yonehana objected: "Yaracchi, your motorbike's about the furthest thing from first class hospital cover there is."
"He'll get chilled," said Totsuka.
"He'll fall off," said Goseki.
"He'll die," said Kawai.
Tsukada fought his smile back on. "Guys, guys," he laughed hoarsely. "I'm not--" Behind his facemask, he dissolved into coughs. "Not going to d--"
Goseki gave him a pointed look. "Tsuka-chan. I trust Yaracchi as much as the next guy over--"
"No you don't," said Yone, grinning. "You trust him more."
"He likes me," Goseki diverted, shrugging as if Yara wasn't there.
"Oi."
"He likes me too," Yonehana chuckled, "but you don't see me betting my life on the fact."
"I'll kill you, Yone," Yara frowned.
"I'd like to see you try. Again. Remember what happened last time?"
Goseki ignored them both as Tsukada's shoulders shook with the effort of not coughing while the exchange went on. "Tsuka-chan," Goseki reiterated: "You're going home."
Tsukada shook his head stubbornly, pushing himself up from the couch. He'd worked through worse back when he'd done competitive gym after all. "No, I'm good..."
Shamelessly, Yara beat Kawai to the newly-vacated seat, stretching out. Yonehana gave him a Look.
"...oh hey!" Yara said after a moment, with articulated melodrama.
Yonehana grinned, crossing his arms. "Oh! What is it, Yaracchi?" he asked equally loudly. "Have you forgotten something?"
Discreetly, Kawai shuffled around to put Goseki between himself and the Musical Academy pair. Totsuka was already there.
"Why, yes," Yara continued, looking up at the ceiling. "You know who isn't here today?"
"Oh! Tell us who!"
"It's Our Great Leader, Machida Shingo."
Tsukada leaned against the drink station, brows knit in morbid trepidation. He hoped he was hallucinating, but a pinch sadly produced nothing more than needly pain and goosebumps.
"Oh dear!" Yonehana continued, looking right at Tsukada and grinning. The Junior's glassy eyes apparently perturbed him not at all. "Whatever is the matter with him, Yaraemon?"
"Bastard," Yara said.
Unfazed, Yonehana sat himself on the end of the couch. "Please continue."
"Fine. It seems that he is sick! He is in the hospital today, Tsuyo-chan!"
Tsukada felt a wave of unease then, that had nothing to do with his illness. Everyone knew that Yonehana's mother was the only one who called him that...
Yonehana cleared his throat. "What terrible news! That Young Tsukada. I wonder if he thinks he's tougher than Our Great Leader Maachin! The hospital is for sick people, after all."
And suddenly Yara's lifespan was the least of Tsukada's worries. "I'm not-- I'm... But... Koichi-san also... I should..." He looked around desperately, but received no help.
"Sorry, man." Kawai made a warding x out of his index fingers, "I'm with them." Totsuka tactfully kept mum.
The world swam a bit.
"Our beloved walking skeleton's sick for about 90% of any given year anyway," Yara sniffed. "He can't be helped."
Yonehana nodded. "And has lines to deliver. All you've got in today's scene is a dance sequence. Which you already know. Tsuka-chan." The acrobatic akuma smiled over his best upward gaze. "Game over. Give it up."
Tsukada croaked. ". . . they said you mellowed out!"
"Who said that again?" Yonehana stuck a pinky in his ear, feigning deafness. "Oh~ if I'm not mistaken, it was Yaracchi and your own Goseki-kun."
Yonehana Tsuyoshi was rarely mistaken. Or if he was, nobody said so. Yara just grinned as Goseki fished around for his car keys.
"Right..." Tsukada said weakly, sagging. "Alright."
:::
"Hey?" Akiyama blinked, returning to the break room with seven bowls of takeaway ramen like the packhorse he was. He looked around the room. It didn't have seven people in it. "How suspicious. Did ABC take an impromptu group excursion to the bathroom or something, this fine lunch hour?"
"Or something," Yara said disdainfully. "Tsukada and his germs are on the way home. Gocchi offered to drive." Kawai and Totsuka had decided to take a ride with for the hell of it. (Not because it was preferable to being stuck around Yone and Yara when the senpai were in certain moods.)
"Ahh," Akiyama said. "That's disappointing."
"Because you'll miss their company, of course."
"Of course," Akiyama smiled broadly, opening one bag of sealed ramen bowls. "Why else?"
"If it's you, Akki, nobody wants to know."
"That's harsh, Yaracchi," Yonehana grinned. He approached the table with a sharkish air perfected from years of Yara's friendship, and seized a bowl of his own. "Harsh and hypocritical."
"Shut up."
"Oh well. Less men more share," Akiyama shrugged, graciously indicating the four spare meals.
"Good," Yara said. He split his chopsticks without ceremony. "I'm starving."
"Yaracchi needs his food," Yonehana grinned, digging in as well. "He's still growing after all."
"I'll kill you."
"You're all talk."
"...this seventh bowl," Akiyama mused; "maybe we should take it to Maachin."
"That's considerate," Yonehana said. "He does always say hospital food's insubstantial."
"Yeah..."
Yara snerked. "What, just one bowl? That bottomless pit'll need at least three." Imperviously, he eyed Akiyama.
Who looked at Yonehana.
Who glanced at Yara, then back to Akki.
"Alright, alright," Akiyama said laboriously. "I'll go take them over, but pay up."
Yara slid 850 yen across the table. "There."
"You're too kind," Yonehana smiled, and put in a little extra to pay for a fourth bowl 'from Koichi' as well.
Maachin is always dying. xD