sanazawa #92
#1 for the SANAZAWA-THON!
92. 4 times Sanada used picked-up lines on Nozawa + 1 time it worked
670w; PG for lots of failbad innuendo. ♥ cursory beta by snowqueenofhoth
Nozawa is reading, glasses perched on his nose and a placid expression on his face until Sanada sidles up. They're down the hall and around the corner, where a couple of plastic chairs sit next to a row of unpopular vending machines. Mis Snow Man's room is never quiet enough to study.
Sanada's studying, too. Just without the glasses and textbook.
"Um, heyyy~" he starts, leaning a little into Nozawa's personal space. His elbow nudges Nozawa's armrest. "Can I try a few pick-up lines on you?"
Nozawa lowers his book a bit, processing the question and the feasibility of Just Saying No to sexual harassment before he turns to regard Sanada steadily. "Must you?"
"It's not a bad time, is it?" Sanada says, and looks so pathetically hopeful that Nozawa can't kick him.
"Alright." Flipping his text shut, Nozawa sighs. "Just a few."
Sanada clears his throat, and Nozawa tries not to wince too early. "Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them. ♥"
"..." Increasingly doubtful and dubious, Nozawa doesn't even want to ask, "Are they all like this?"
"No, nono they're not!" Sanada says, quick to assure. "How about this one?" He fishes his phone out of his pocket, flipping it open. Its charms jangle, the cheap little Year of the Monkey one that Nozawa won him over the weekend festival looking particularly garish. "There seems to be something wrong with my phone: it doesn't have your number in it!"
"...ugh." Nozawa nudges his glasses up, rubbing an eye. "Bad!"
"Um, I seem to have lost my number... could I borrow yours?"
"Bad!"
Sanada gives a melodramatic sigh. "Okay, okay, you obviously don't like those. Let me try a different kind."
Nozawa leans back and crosses his arms, preparing to (really) be impressed (honestly)- and it almost even works when Sanada drops his gaze, long lashes brushing his cheeks a moment before he looks back up with a practised senpai-smirk on his face.
Almost.
Then: "You know~ they call me Coffee, I grind so fine."
Nozawa's skull thuds against the wall behind him with a groan. "No. Just... no. Stop. I've changed my mind, go practice on Miyadate."
But Sanada won't be deterred so easily. Standing, he pockets his keitai with a casual, deliberate swing of his hips. The smirk doesn't go away and neither does the double entendre: "Wanna see something swell~?"
Nozawa buries his face in his hands. "Yuuma, any discerning girl would just punch you in the face to see an eye swell instead, seriously."
"...oh," Sanada says. "So, you're a girl huh?"
Nozawa quirks a brow, looking up. "Was that a line?"
"No?" Sanada says- amending: "Yes- I mean..."
Nozawa shakes his head. "Where did you even get these? Off the Internet? Or was it Abe?"
Sanada's cheeks flush as he sits himself back down. "Just one more?" he asks, that hopeful look back in his eyes.
"Last one," Nozawa says firmly. "Sink or swim."
"Okay!" With a deep breath, Sanada leans in a little, elbow back on the armrest, and gives Nozawa his most winning smile. "Ne, Yuuki... Can I try a few pick-up lines on you?"
And Nozawa valiantly resists the urge to hit him over the head, laughing instead. "Moron."
*
"So~ There's this movie out, but my mom says I can't see it unsupervised-"
"Can we stop with the cheese, Yuuma? Please."
"...come see a movie with me, Yuuki!"
"What do you want to see?"
"Well, Hannah Mon-"
"No."
"But, Yuuki..."
"But, Yuuma. Go see it by yourself. But come sleep over at my place after if you like, Mom won't mind."
"..."
"What?"
"You're heaps cuter than Miley Cyrus anyway, you know?"
"Yuuma..."
"And you're hotter than she was in her naked shots, too."
"Yuuma, stop that!"
"What, thinking of me thinking about you naked?"
"Yuuma. I'm going home now."
"Wait for meee~"
♥
92. 4 times Sanada used picked-up lines on Nozawa + 1 time it worked
670w; PG for lots of failbad innuendo. ♥ cursory beta by snowqueenofhoth
Nozawa is reading, glasses perched on his nose and a placid expression on his face until Sanada sidles up. They're down the hall and around the corner, where a couple of plastic chairs sit next to a row of unpopular vending machines. Mis Snow Man's room is never quiet enough to study.
Sanada's studying, too. Just without the glasses and textbook.
"Um, heyyy~" he starts, leaning a little into Nozawa's personal space. His elbow nudges Nozawa's armrest. "Can I try a few pick-up lines on you?"
Nozawa lowers his book a bit, processing the question and the feasibility of Just Saying No to sexual harassment before he turns to regard Sanada steadily. "Must you?"
"It's not a bad time, is it?" Sanada says, and looks so pathetically hopeful that Nozawa can't kick him.
"Alright." Flipping his text shut, Nozawa sighs. "Just a few."
Sanada clears his throat, and Nozawa tries not to wince too early. "Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them. ♥"
"..." Increasingly doubtful and dubious, Nozawa doesn't even want to ask, "Are they all like this?"
"No, nono they're not!" Sanada says, quick to assure. "How about this one?" He fishes his phone out of his pocket, flipping it open. Its charms jangle, the cheap little Year of the Monkey one that Nozawa won him over the weekend festival looking particularly garish. "There seems to be something wrong with my phone: it doesn't have your number in it!"
"...ugh." Nozawa nudges his glasses up, rubbing an eye. "Bad!"
"Um, I seem to have lost my number... could I borrow yours?"
"Bad!"
Sanada gives a melodramatic sigh. "Okay, okay, you obviously don't like those. Let me try a different kind."
Nozawa leans back and crosses his arms, preparing to (really) be impressed (honestly)- and it almost even works when Sanada drops his gaze, long lashes brushing his cheeks a moment before he looks back up with a practised senpai-smirk on his face.
Almost.
Then: "You know~ they call me Coffee, I grind so fine."
Nozawa's skull thuds against the wall behind him with a groan. "No. Just... no. Stop. I've changed my mind, go practice on Miyadate."
But Sanada won't be deterred so easily. Standing, he pockets his keitai with a casual, deliberate swing of his hips. The smirk doesn't go away and neither does the double entendre: "Wanna see something swell~?"
Nozawa buries his face in his hands. "Yuuma, any discerning girl would just punch you in the face to see an eye swell instead, seriously."
"...oh," Sanada says. "So, you're a girl huh?"
Nozawa quirks a brow, looking up. "Was that a line?"
"No?" Sanada says- amending: "Yes- I mean..."
Nozawa shakes his head. "Where did you even get these? Off the Internet? Or was it Abe?"
Sanada's cheeks flush as he sits himself back down. "Just one more?" he asks, that hopeful look back in his eyes.
"Last one," Nozawa says firmly. "Sink or swim."
"Okay!" With a deep breath, Sanada leans in a little, elbow back on the armrest, and gives Nozawa his most winning smile. "Ne, Yuuki... Can I try a few pick-up lines on you?"
And Nozawa valiantly resists the urge to hit him over the head, laughing instead. "Moron."
*
"So~ There's this movie out, but my mom says I can't see it unsupervised-"
"Can we stop with the cheese, Yuuma? Please."
"...come see a movie with me, Yuuki!"
"What do you want to see?"
"Well, Hannah Mon-"
"No."
"But, Yuuki..."
"But, Yuuma. Go see it by yourself. But come sleep over at my place after if you like, Mom won't mind."
"..."
"What?"
"You're heaps cuter than Miley Cyrus anyway, you know?"
"Yuuma..."
"And you're hotter than she was in her naked shots, too."
"Yuuma, stop that!"
"What, thinking of me thinking about you naked?"
"Yuuma. I'm going home now."
"Wait for meee~"
♥