I had an epiphany today
related to my bipolar
which i've been offically diagnosed with
along with ptsd
apparently i've had more mania
than I originally thought

If you haven't see the movie defenitely, maybe
you should see it. Its sweet.
in other news:

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my phone has offically left the planet earth
i cant find it to save my life
ive never lost my phone and not found it within 5 mins
oooo the horror
so no phone until money eases up
didnt want ppl to think i was ignoring them
im just the moron who lost her phone
<<<<>>>>
dad knows im cutting
he just doesnt realize how bad

I feel better about not having a job after reading about ptsd
I still feel like a huge ass for not being able to take care of
myself but not a big of one

I cut my arm, and my leg, but that one isn't bad
the arm one probably needs stitches.
Its just hard for me to tell my dad.
I just need to
 he'll understand
even if I don't want to stop
 

So I sort of finally got an official diagnosis from my med lady.
ptsd with possible bipolar
I feel better having a name for it
I dont know why but it does make a difference

Marissa, you've never been one of those people.
and I don't see you ever being one.

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People like you are the reason I cut myself
I should have told you that
But you wouldn't care anyways

fuck off you cunt

"Did you feel the life or death feeling?"
"Yeah, it was kind of like constipation'
               -Dad, you're just as weird as me

I FINALLY WILL HAVE A BEDROOM TONIGHT!
I just won't be able to sleep in in just yet. My dad has been working on my
room for the last couple of months on the weekend. And today it will be all
finished. 3 walls blue and one pink. It looks bright and cheery and all that.
One wall has a built in book shelf and desk. I'll take pics soon.

I'm so excited...and ( Read more... )