Attempting to keep this regularly updated.
I have been in the weirdest mood for weeks. I know that’s not exactly a new thing, but this is like an unidentifiable weird mood. Honestly? I must be crazy hormonal. It’s the only explanation.
Last night I ate mousse chocolate, watched the Rugrats and Hey Arnold and masturbated basically. I should have been doing homework to be fair, and got yelled at this morning for not doing it but whatever, I needed some me time. It actually made me feel really rejuvenated though somehow I was still exhausted when I woke up this morning.
However, I also made the mistake of reading up on the ‘Rugrats theory’ and that shit is fucked up man. I mean, I’d read it on Tumblr a while back but I don’t think I was paying a lot of attention then. It’s like fucking Squidward’s Suicide 2.0 man. Actually I’m pretty sure it’s from the same website. I think what makes it so scary, is that it actually could be realistic in a really twisted way. It’s like some story involving ghosts and monsters and whatnot, it’s like stuff that’s scary irl and a reality. Needless to say I was like running back on forth in the darkness trying to get to the toilet I was so scared.
Then I watched the Mother’s Day episode and cried.
At least it wasn’t as bad as when I watched Suddenly 30 last week. Masturbating was still prevalent, but there was a lot more crying. I don’t actually know why it affected me so much actually. Probably because I’m so very weirded out by the prospect of waking up and having skipped like 16 years of my life. I’m just weird about growing up at all. Especially with the knowledge that you never really stop screwing up no matter how old you are.
Anyway, I got off and then a monopoly box fell on my head and I cried because I could have died then I went back to getting off. Um.
Something I also forgot to talk about last time is how proud I am of Hoya rn! Well, I’m always proud of Hoya, but I’ve had extra feels recently. He obviously started acting in his first drama just recently and then I found out the character is gay! I don’t actually think it’ll end well with his character and who he has a thing for but it still looks really good! It’s called Reply 1997 and I guess it’s a flashback sort of thing to the 90s. Idk, as I said, so far I’ve only seen clips here and there.
I give major props to Woollim tho for being so far quite pro-LGBT. Epik High, Baby Soul and Yoo Jia’s video, Nell and some other things. Like when Hoya mentioned that they’re not allowed to date other members. I’m pretty sure he was joking about wanting to date Dongwoo but the other part didn’t sound like joking to me. If it’s true, then that means Woollim definitely considered that one or more of them could be gay and didn’t want them dating and messing up the group and such. Whatever we all know Sungjong and Myungsoo are dating anyway
I’ve also been catching up on the new season of The Real L World, because it’s just nice to see some of my own kind in Reality TV format sometimes. Idk, I’m addicted to reality TV, but the Real L World is definitely somewhere at the top under Dance Moms.
Trying to gather my thoughts about what has happened so far is actually quite hard tho.
For starters Romi just needs to get her shit together okay. For her own sake and everyone else’s. I understand that what she’s going through isn’t easy, but rly. She dates this guy and then when she isn’t getting 100 per cent of his attention she moves back to Kelsey. I mean you can clearly see she’s conflicted about her sexuality but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to be flip flopping from person to person depending upon how much attention they give you. I’m just bitter because people are constantly telling me that I have a problem with constantly needing attention and I really don’t think it’s true, at least not to a damaging degree.
I also feel for Kelsey okay, because she deserves someone who won’t keep messing with her head like that. It’s really not healthy… like at all. Romi jumps from a guy, to Kelsey and then back to a guy. All the while like it sucks to watch because you can tell Kelsey actually does love her… and Romi just loves attention.
I love that Whitney has finally settled down with Sara though; they’re perfect together idec what anyone says tbh. When Whitney proposed I pretty much just broke and died ngl.
Even though I love them together I also love the House of Whitney’s exes tbh. In this case I’m not really taking sides.
Kiyomi drives me nuts and quite frankly I think she’s a gross asshole. I don’t know I think it’s her attitude, but whatever it is it’s a huge turn off and she rly doesn’t have the looks to back up her superiority complex.
Laura is actually the most adorable person in the world okay. It probably helps that I have a thing for drummers but she’s just uabiudvyudv. When she went topless I did basically lose it tho.
Vero needs to talk all the time, and she doesn’t, but when she does I just melt okay. She’s like the band’s fluffy mediator made of sunshine and rainbows.
Somer I’m basically indifferent about.
Lauren and Amanda are like two of the most attractive white girls I’ve ever seen. But no matter how much either of them waffle on about how they’re friends with benefits… actions speak louder than words. You can like take a butter knife and cut through the feelings. They just need to confess and then bang. I will be happy.
Wow, that was messy. Anyway continuing on, I have so much I have to do omg. I feel like I’m drowning in obligations. So for the record I have two huge assignments due, one which is already a day late and I have to write back to my cousin’s five page letter and fill up some usbs with music for her.
Doesn’t actually sound like much, but it actually is tbh.
I think I’ll write the letter first, cause I’m currently in a good mood I don’t want to sour myself too much.
I was also supposed to have a haircut today, but that got cancelled because my hairdresser injured her back or s/t. Which was actually a relief because I managed to get some much needed sleep. I just hope I can get it done before next week, because I’m going out with Mitch on Friday for his birthday and I don’t want to look homeless.
On that note leaving these here:
