this weekend was pretty good. worked friday night, made 100 bucks and then went to dance night with travis. he is such a blast to dance with! i also danced a ton with penn, who is always crazy as shit! afterwards we went to fourth street and froze our butts off it was so cold out! saturday the resturant was closed for a wedding so i slept all day ( Read more... )

ayn told me last night that dan drank a beer last week. i dont even know what to say, but i guess it really doesnt matter what i think either.

'the leaving is a curious way for you to love me'

today was a full crazy day. i slept until 10:54 and had french at 11 and i somehow made it there by 11:05. it rocked. had stat and physics lab in the afternoon. im working with the silliest kids in physics. one guy is tall and skinny as a bone and akaward like my friend peter and the other girl is kinda dumb, preppy, from the southside and LOVES ( Read more... )

"and i loved to look at you from the side at night with music playing.."

even if love- bonnie 'prince' billy

i keep having these extremely vivid dreams and it sucks. i'll be somewhere and he'll suddenly show up and put his hand on my neck and cheek and then say something to the effect that he loves me and wants to work things out. last night it was so real when i woke up i thought it was real for like 20 minutes. it wasn’t until i walked into my front ( Read more... )

these weekend has been extremley rough. every night is the same. i was sure that things were gonna improve to some degree and it doesnt. i got out and do things all day and as soon as i get alone i just collaspe. this is much harder than i expected.

i miss so many things.

ya know what, fuck it! i'm never gettin emotionally attached to anything or anyone anymore, because they always leave and i'm always left alone. no one else does, so why the f' should i?

yeah i'm a "great girl" but everyone fucking abandons me. so fuck it, and fuck everyone.

so i called and cleared the air. i feel much better.

'i dont want to walk around
i dont even want to breath
stuck in this southern town
where all you can do is grit your teeth'