Attempt at humor
unbetated, of course
Note: gianfared let me borrow her fabulous idea of the teleprism (as mentioned in DGW). Thanks, Gia, you are fabulous and I hope this makes you laugh!
Maximus
Ron rolled his eyes as he caught sight of what was spread on the Burrow's kitchen table. "Put that away, will you?" Ron berated Seamus, whipping his head around to check the door. "If my Mum catches you looking at that in her house, she'll have kittens."
"Ickle Ronniekins, how old are you, again?" Seamus taunted as if they were still children at Hogwarts.
"Don't underestimate the wrath of Molly Weasley," Ron warned. "Charlie can barely hear out of his right ear 'cause she boxed him after she caught him with an issue of Naughty Necromancer years ago."
"When's she due back?" Harry asked, noting the mischievous grin he and Neville were getting from Seamus. "She's shopping with Ginny?"
"Yeah, Gin leaves tomorrow on a road match with the Falcons. She's a big Quidditch star now with hardly any free time at all, so she and Mum are meeting for tea," Ron replied checking the door that led to the lounge again.
"They're not due back for a while then," Seamus commented boldly, sliding the issue towards Harry wiggling his eyebrows. "Flip to the centerfold."
"Lemme see," Ron demanded, reaching for the glossy pages.
"Um, maybe not, Ron," Harry stammered, knowing that Seamus was up to something. He pulled the copy off of the scarred, wooden table hugging it protectively to his chest.
"Harry, if you think I'm getting my fill of naked witch with Hermione, you're wrong," Ron chuckled, prying the latest issue of Maximus magazine from Harry's firm hold.
"They're featuring the Women of Quidditch," Ron mumbled reading the cover aloud before flipping through the pages, "What I wouldn't give to catch sight of Katie Bell in nothing but her- "
The magazine unfurled itself to the centerfold as he laid it on the table. Blinking at the photo before him, slowly meeting his mate's eyes in shock, "That's...that's... What the BLOODY HELL is Ginny doing in this...this... And she's starkers! I've just seen my sister naked," Ron fumed slumping into a chair covering his eyes to scrub away the vision.
"Who'd've thought Ginny had freckles there?" Seamus guffawed, pointing randomly to Ginny's bare stomach.
"Sod off, Finnigan! I could have lived a happy life not knowing about this," Ron screeched at his former Housemate, his temper vivid on his face.
"In just her, her Quidditch pads..." Harry whispered in awe as he ogled the moving, magical photo of his best mate's baby sister in nothing but her quilted, leather Quidditch pads. With the wind blowing through her hair, the attractive red head in the picture smiled seductively at him as she perched on the edge of a broomstick.
"Think of Pansy, think of Pansy," Neville repeated under his breath as a mantra, turning his head from the magazine, a blush coloring his cheeks.
"Makes sense about the endorsement deal she received with Fleetwood's High-Finish Handle Polish," Ron said disgustedly, turning his back from the table as the other men laughed. "Next thing you know, you lot will be seeing her on the teleprism in one of those "Witches Gone Wild" shows."
"What's all the commotion in there?" Molly called from the lounge as she exited the floo.
Calling quick, nervous greetings the men dragged the magazine from the eating surface and hid it in Harry's robe pocket.
"What a nice treat, seeing you all here. It was a nightmare being out, all those adoring fans mobbing her," Mrs. Weasley smiled tiredly, laying down her shopping bags then calling over her shoulder, "Ginny, dear, come say hello."
Ginny entered the room catching the heavy stares of all four men. Ron's menacing glance combined with the fierce blush from Neville and Harry followed by Seamus' lustful gaze alerted her to how much they knew about her latest publicity efforts. Smiling as seductively as she had in the magazine, she dared them, "Now, who has something they would like me to autograph?"