i'm sick of thinking about this.
sorry.

i pretty much fucked up a lot today ( Read more... )

tonight was definetly needed/appreciated.

i left last night holding back tears only because he made me that happy. I enjoy every minute spent with him, and the conversation was much needed and appreciated.

i am sure that the main reason i am well is because he is happy.

the promise of something better than this was is wonderful.

i have already lost interest in most of them and its better this way as i am leaving in a few months.

i kind of just want to spend my summer alone.

i feel as though i am too preoccupied with him. I'd like to not think/talk about it all the time. I feel more in control right now than i have ever. And for some reason he is someone who i have not been able to keep out of my life. Even when i have thought everything was done between us, friendship and all. It just made everything stronger. It ( Read more... )

why does everything in my life revolve around him.

i'd like to be a better person so he wouldn't treat me this way, and he makes me feel like i deserve it.

i have been extremely distressed concerning my possible departure. In the past 2 years i have not settled down once.the longest i've spent in a place is 4 months. So now arriving at that i am growing more and unhappy with everything here. I should not be making important decisions with my emotions. I want to start on my own, i want it all to be ( Read more... )

3 am came too soon.
if she hadn't come in i probably would have continued. i couldn't even look at her but her presence helped.

i'm going to portugal/spain this summer!