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Comments 19

roina_arwen October 1 2019, 17:57:47 UTC
Amazing worldbuilding here! Kind of long but worth every minute!

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dizzydog October 3 2019, 23:20:52 UTC
Thank you! I was worried about writing something this long this soon, but it felt right and I'm glad it was worth it for you :D

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rayaso October 1 2019, 18:20:01 UTC
What a fascinating dystopic tale! I particularly loved "replaced with enough electronic eyes he'd give a spider nightmares" -- definitely a cringe-worthy image.

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dizzydog October 3 2019, 23:23:37 UTC
I love doing dystopic with a twist, there'll always be a bit of fun stirred in for a smile :D And I loved that description too, at some point I'd seen a cyberpunk sketch someone had done of a way over-the-top cyborg like that and it's always stuck with me.

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murielle October 1 2019, 21:38:56 UTC
Captivated from the start! :-)

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dizzydog October 3 2019, 23:29:41 UTC
Thank you, I hope I can draw you in with more entries in the future too! :D

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alexanderscttb October 3 2019, 19:44:55 UTC

... )

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alexanderscttb October 3 2019, 20:08:43 UTC
This left me speechless.
I couldn't be more down with the ethos of this piece. When I reached this bit, about "the flesh they so easily abandoned in life took pieces of their soul with them, more and more of what it meant to be human lost forever as they turned into machines," I was just so in. . .
A reference that came to mind was PKD, although, I have never actually read any of his work. . . I have seen some films based on his novels however, and the moment when Wilson mentions "the flowers [he] was looking for," I felt, seemed to echo the conclusion of 'A Scanner Darkly.' I don't know if that was an intentional allusion or not, but I dug the hell out of it. . .
You also very much intrigued me, with the dog tag stamped by the eighth heavenly stem. All I could think of was, perhaps it also alluded to the notion of being trapped in between two states of existence.
I would be extremely interested to see what kind of story develops out of this world; in fact, I hope this becomes a book someday, because I would fucking buy it.

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dizzydog October 3 2019, 23:51:58 UTC
This all made me very happy, thank you! :D ( ... )

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alexanderscttb October 4 2019, 20:53:05 UTC
Awesome! And thank you for your elaborations--

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