I am in portland, hanging out at satch and drews place, and I am having crazy flash backs. somebody is trying to get sage's old highschool friend to start dating my ex-girlfriend Carmen (I don't think I ever even knew her last name, and I think that's awful), and I have also been wondering how the hell kate is.
I am always at a loss when my friends are in a funk. I don't know how to help, I don't know how to be that shining friend that brings them back from sadville to the moment they are in. it really is one of my major downfalls. do they teach classes on that? can I go to school for funk, and funk revivovlry?
point one: I am not interested in Los Angeles in any aesthetic sense, and probably because of that I am not interested in most of the people
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my demon is cynicism. it boils over in the face of defeat. so I tend to lean towards easily achievable goals. when I do go out on a limb. I lean out as far as I can. and if I fall. my blood runs green. what comes of my does not return to the earth.
I am so close to going on vacation. I probably won't have enough money to make it through, but that's okay. when I get back I will most likely still have a job, and will also have the means and transportation to make and sell hats in portland. my whole fucking body hurts, and i'm not sore. I have got stop being a complete .... incomplete.... hmm