Merlin fic: With a heavy heart {one-shot}

[dk323]

Title: With A Heavy Heart (1/1)
Author: dk323
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 7,310
Characters/Pairings: Arthur/Merlin, implied Arthur/Gwen, Lancelot/Gwaine (if you want to see it that way - I couldn’t resist ;)), Morgana, Morgause, Freya
Disclaimer: The show Merlin is property of the BBC.  
Summary: Merlin couldn’t be happier. Arthur knows about his magic and he has accepted it.

But unfortunately, Morgana and Morgause have a plan to divide Arthur and Merlin.

Author’s Notes: This is set some time after 3x04. Morgana and Morgause are already well aware of Merlin having magic. Also, Gwaine has already visited Camelot and left…and there’s a strong likelihood he crossed paths with Lancelot after departing from Camelot. *cough*

~ * ~

Merlin hummed to himself as he cleaned Arthur’s chambers. The prince was at training with his knights, and Merlin had never felt happier than he did at that moment.

He had told Arthur the previous evening about his magic and to his surprise and relief, Arthur took it well. Better than Merlin had expected Arthur to take the news. In fact, Arthur had informed him that he had suspected for some time now about Merlin’s true nature, but he hadn’t been sure what to do about it. That for better or for worse, Merlin - mental affliction and all - had gotten under his skin and Arthur couldn’t find it in himself to give Merlin away, to have him executed.

Merlin almost couldn’t believe how smoothly the whole matter went. Worst case, he thought Arthur would summon the guards to send Merlin to the dungeons or order Merlin to leave Camelot. And the thought of leaving Camelot, leaving Arthur without his protection, defenseless to magical attack, was inconceivable to Merlin.

But the prince had done none of those things besides well, strongly warning Merlin to be careful about wielding his magic. After all, if his magic was meant to be a secret, then Merlin shouldn’t make it easy for anyone else to discover the truth - particularly the King. And Merlin certainly did not wish to place Arthur in the position of choosing between him and abiding by his father’s laws.

Keeping the magic a secret between them gave the both of them a chance to pretend that everything was the same as before. That as long as Uther didn’t know, then Arthur could keep Merlin’s secret, secure in the knowledge that he was simply protecting someone who he had come to view as a good friend, a confidante.

And that admission from Arthur, more than anything else, led to Merlin feeling especially cheerful today.

Not even Morgana’s stifling presence in Camelot would deter him from his excitement over this positive turn of events.

With Arthur knowing now, Merlin felt safer in a way…knowing that his burden of keeping his magic secret was lightened even more so than it had been when Gaius was the only one who he could confide in.

~ * ~

“Merlin?” Arthur addressed him, looking up from his lunch plate to grace Merlin with a piercing gaze.

“Yes?”

“The bathwater? The temperature stayed warm for longer than normal…that was you, wasn’t it?”

Merlin nodded, smiling. “Yes, it was.”

Arthur appeared pensive for a moment. “Maybe you’re not as incompetent as I was led to believe,” he mused, lips twisting into a fond half-smile.

Merlin grinned back at him. “My Lord,” he said cheekily as he moved forward to refill Arthur’s cup.

~ * ~

“Merlin is unaware that we know about his magic, correct?” Morgause asked Morgana. She sighed upon seeing her sister looking listlessly at the table, at the only small space left unoccupied by the crystal.

“Morgana?” She raised her voice slightly, seeking her attention.

Morgana shook her head quickly, as if to clear it, and looked to Morgause. “Yes, as far as I know, he doesn’t. For all his keeping an eye out for me, he isn’t exactly stealthy with using magic. None too surprising as you can imagine,” she said with a small smirk.

After all, she had managed to thwart him when Merlin had dared to think he could spy on her without her noticing.

Morgause looked amused as well, but then she remarked, her tone one of ill ease, “But no matter that little detail, Sister, because it appears that Merlin has confided in the prince about his magic. I have Seen in the crystal that the boy performed magic in front of the prince with not a whit of alarm from Uther’s son. I do not know the extent of what that boy told him, if he detailed what he had done to you…but we can not allow this to continue. Merlin now has assured influence over the prince, and he will--”

But Morgana interrupted her, “Let’s not fool ourselves. Merlin has had Arthur’s ear, his favour, for a long time now. Certainly Arthur knowing about the magic only serves to strengthen their bond,” she told her. “Even I was never as close to Arthur as Merlin now is. But I do not see how this changes anything. We still know about Merlin, and he doesn’t know that we know. I could easily tell Uther about Merlin tomorrow and even Arthur can do nothing to stop his father from executing Merlin.”

“The truth of his magic together with him poisoning you…” Morgause pondered.

“And Uther will not be reasoned with. Merlin would be as good as dead,” Morgana finished.

“Something must be done to rectify this,” Morgause intoned.

“What do you mean?”

“Surely you don’t want Merlin to be happy as he is now?”

“But our focus is on Uther…” Morgana argued.

“After what Merlin did to you? And managing to thwart us time and again? Do you not thirst for revenge, Morgana?”

Morgana looked uncertain for a fleeting moment, but then she nodded resolutely. “Should I tell Uther about Merlin? Seal his fate that way?”

Her sister shook her head. "While that is a logical route to take, I think it rather dull. We should focus on the heart of the matter -- the bond between Merlin and the prince and severing that bond. To have Merlin executed will only bring him physical pain. I would not be surprised if he takes his fate well if he has belief that Arthur is still on his side. Emotional pain -- severing his friendship with Arthur -- would be much more satisfying. As such, my plan will involve changing the prince’s mind,” Morgause explained smoothly.

When Morgana didn’t answer her after a moment, Morgause turned her attention from her crystal to peer oddly at her sister.

“What is the matter with you, Morgana? You seem distracted lately,” Morgause noted, concerned.

Morgana shook her head, giving her sister a wane smile. “I’m fine. Really, I’m fine. What do you need me to do?” She asked her, forcefully changing the subject.

Morgause stared at her for a beat, debating whether to press the matter, but then she shrugged it off and told Morgana what she required of her.

~ * ~

As the dawn crept over the white castle, Morgana performed the enchantment on a sleeping Arthur in his bedchambers.

Since she had raised an Army of the Dead months ago, Morgana had made great strides in strengthening her own magical abilities. She didn’t need to lean on her sister as much anymore for magical assistance. And this enchantment was not all that difficult to do. It was a mere dream spell that entailed a series of convincing visions. Of course, dreams were Morgana’s specialty due to her prowess at Seeing.

The dream would be so vivid, so undeniably real, to the person experiencing the dream that the dream's strength would be enough to change the person's mind.

But only her frustration with Merlin drove her to go through with this deed. She hadn’t been especially thrilled with placing an enchantment on Arthur, but a niggling part of her wanted Merlin to suffer for tricking her and poisoning her, severing their friendship in the process.

But that would be the last of it.

She had been feeling adrift lately, and she could not deny that Morgause was manipulating her.

So she decided for her own sake, that she would trust in no one but herself. Morgana didn’t know where she would go or what she would do, but as she left Camelot astride a dark steed, she felt certain that she was doing the right thing.

~ * ~

That morning, Gaius was surprised to see Merlin rush into his chambers, looking as if a Fury was coming after him.

“Merlin, what is going on?” Gaius demanded to know as Merlin made hurried strides toward his bedroom.

Merlin turned his head around, a deeply upset look on his face. “I’m sorry, Gaius. But I have to leave Camelot. Right now. I don’t have time…”

“What happened? I thought everything was fine after you told Arthur…did Uther find out?”

Merlin shook his head. “No, no. The King knows nothing. Something…Arthur’s really mad at me. He’s changed his mind…he said he wants to kill me because of who I am. I need to leave before he has the chance to.”

Gaius raised his eyebrow. “Did you run all the way from his chambers?”

Merlin looked momentarily pleased with himself as he explained, “I uh…managed to use my magic to disappear. I landed just in the corridor outside. But it’s best that I leave now before Arthur collects himself and he does tell his father about me.”

Before Gaius could ask any further questions, Merlin had gone inside of his small room. The court physician could hear noises of items being shifted around in a hurry.

Less than ten minutes later, Merlin had left his room with a pack strapped to his back.

“Did the prince say why? What could have happened to change his mind?” Gaius wondered.

There was a hard knock at the door to the court physician’s chambers.

Merlin looked anxious as he explained in a rush, “He said that he saw me doing horrible, unforgivable things like killing Uther… Morgana and Morgause are behind this, I’m sure. During the night…”

“Gaius! Are you in there? The prince has summoned Merlin,” Someone, most likely a guard, announced from outside of the room.

“I really have to go. Arthur won’t listen to reason,” Merlin said.

Gaius nodded. “Go, go…if you could…the faster way,” he advised.

Merlin gave him a curt nod. They hugged each other goodbye and Merlin concentrated on doing his disappearing act again.

It worked.

~ * ~

Merlin used his magic to transport himself to the nearby forest.

He bit back a gasp when he found Arthur there in front of him.

“How did you--?” He just managed to say, the shock still leaving him speechless.

He didn’t know how Arthur could have known that Merlin would be here, but he didn’t exactly have the luxury of time to contemplate the question.

“Where do you think you’re going, Merlin?” Arthur asked softly, but his tone was threatening.

He unsheathed his sword and Merlin stepped back, almost jumping back out of sheer nerves.

“Arthur, please. Whatever you saw in the dream, vision, whatever you think it was - you know me. I would never do those things. Please, Arthur,” Merlin pleaded with him, an earnest expression upon his face.

“You don’t have the right to call me by my name, Merlin,” he said bitterly.

Merlin stood still, attempting to stay calm as Arthur directed his blade at him.

Merlin’s shoulders slumped. He felt defeated, and he was certain he looked it. Maybe this was how it was always meant to go… maybe he was meant to die now. That would be for the best. Although a voice that sounded remarkably like Kilgharrah reminded him, “You and Arthur are two sides of the same coin. The two of you will unite the land of Albion. You need to believe in the future.” But Merlin shrugged the words off. With Morgana and Morgause thwarting him at every turn, what sort of future was that? Certainly not a peaceful one.

“If you’re going to kill me, then make it quick… please, just get on with it,” Merlin said quietly.

Arthur’s blue eyes flashed, and Merlin’s gaze held against the prince’s. Arthur seemed to be searching for something within Merlin’s steady yet resigned look.

The prince’s grip on his sword wavered, his hand trembling. Then he sheathed his sword roughly, his mouth a thin, hard line.

He turned his back on Merlin and began walking away.

“Ar-My Lord?” Merlin asked, confused about Arthur’s actions.

“I’m exiling you from Camelot,” Arthur told him, not even sparing a glance at Merlin as he answered him.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” Merlin exclaimed desperately. “If there is anything I could say or do to make things better. What you saw was untrue. It will never happen.”

Arthur turned around sharply. He looked sternly at him. “I can not take that risk. I am sparing your life. Do not make me regret this moment of weakness, Merlin. Just…” he sighed then, his eyes weary. “Just stay away from Camelot,” Arthur said firmly.

The prince left him then, and no amount of pleading from Merlin would persuade him to turn back around one last time.

If Arthur was planning to inform his father, the King, about Merlin - Merlin did not know, but if he was exiled now, Merlin certainly couldn’t stay and find out.

~ * ~

Gwen came into Arthur’s chambers around lunchtime to find him pushing his writing table toward another wall.

“Sire?” She asked, puzzled. “What are you doing?”

He looked up at her. “I’m redecorating,” he answered shortly.

The table legs caused friction against the hard floor as the piece of furniture was moved. The sound was grating to anyone in close proximity.

“You look upset,” she noted, showing concern.

She stepped toward him

“I’m fine, Gwen. There’s no need--” Arthur paused then he informed her, “Merlin’s left Camelot, by the way. If you were wondering…I know you two are friends.”

“Of course we are,” Gwen said emphatically. “But why? What happened?” She asked worriedly.

Arthur shrugged. “He’s a bloody awful manservant, that’s what,” he said flippantly.

“You don’t mean that,” Gwen said softly.

But when Arthur fell abruptly silent, Gwen getting little else out of him, she left his chambers with a sad look on her face.

Arthur threw a goblet at the closed doors to vent his frustrations.

He had done the right thing, hadn’t he?

~ * ~

“Where is she? Where is Morgana?” Morgause demanded, twisting the cylindrical instrument afterwards.

Merlin gritted his teeth, trying not to scream out as his magic reacted violently when Morgause activated the instrument once again. After the first few times, Merlin had come to the conclusion that the instrument caused his magic to attack him from within. It was the worst, most painful feeling in the world. Like knives slicing into him at every point in his body, a white-hot, sharp pain that made death a blessed reprieve.

And it appeared that the instrument only worked against his magic as Morgause was left completely unaffected.

Merlin swore under his breath. Of course, Morgana had been watching him as closely as he had her. It would have only been a matter of time when her observations yielded the truth regarding Merlin’s magical nature. And then Morgause had spent quality time devising an instrument to specifically torture him - his own magic working against him in an act of irony not lost on Merlin.

Morgause had found him and wielded the instrument against him, sending a wholly unpleasant shock to his system and leaving him considerably weakened. Repeated use of the instrument certainly didn’t make Merlin feel any better. It made him a bit drowsy actually.

“I don’t know where Morgana is,” Merlin emphasized. “Telling you so again doesn’t make it any less true.”

But Morgause would not be deterred. “You must have told her something. Morgana was supposed to meet with me to confirm the status of the plan, but instead she’s gone. She’s left Camelot, but I can not find out where she was heading. And I believe it’s your fault.”

“The plan to make Arthur turn me away? Was that it? Well, it bloody worked. He has exiled me. Good job,” Merlin said sarcastically.

Morgause twisted the cylinder again and this time, Merlin couldn’t help but scream at the resulting pain. Morgause smirked, pleased.

“Whatever her reasons for leaving are her own. I don’t have a clue why Morgana didn’t return to you,” Merlin argued, trying to shrug off the inquiry.

Morgause frowned, annoyed with his answer. She sat down in front of him and she lifted his chin. He was forced to look her in the eye.

“Oh no, but I see you for what you really are. A master at manipulation. You’re so expert at the game that no one realizes just how truly dangerous you are. How you wheedled your way into the prince’s heart, so that even after you revealed your magic to him…you already had him. You knew he wouldn’t react negatively. That’s manipulation, Merlin,” Morgause explained smoothly.

“I bloody know what manipulation means,” Merlin grumbled, “And if anyone was manipulating Morgana, it was you. Congratulations. Maybe she’s had enough of her dear sister.”

“So you did talk to her. Convince her to turn against me,” Morgause accused.

“If you’re so set on believing that figment of your imagination, then yes. Happy now?”

“No,” she said.

Then Morgause twisted the instrument again. Merlin did his best to bite back his scream, but it was futile.

~ * ~

“I’m giving you two options,” Morgause told him.

She was pacing now while Merlin, exhausted and relieved that he wasn’t being subjected to the instrument, sat slumped by the wall. His knees were drawn up and his arms were wrapped around his legs as if making himself smaller would make the residual pain hurt less.

“What?” Merlin asked her weakly, his voice a whisper after all the pain he had endured.

“Without Morgana, I’m without an accomplice… and you fit that role nicely. With a little training of course.”

“I’d rather die,” Merlin said fiercely, “My magic is for Arthur.”

“To still believe in your destiny with him even now…knowing you may never return to Camelot. How naïve of you,” she murmured.

Morgause looked amused.

“That’s me: naïve and manipulative,” Merlin said with a small shrug.

She knelt down in front of him. Merlin glared at her when Morgause reached out to lay a hand upon his cheek.

“Stop that,” Merlin protested.

Morgause smirked at him. She pressed a finger over his lips and Merlin felt compelled to bite it, to wipe that smug look off her face.

But then she gave a significant look toward the torture instrument she was holding. She looked back at him. “A few more times with the instrument, and you’ll wish you never had magic,” Morgause remarked.

Too annoyed to care, Merlin ripped her hand away from his face. “I’ll never join you or help you. So don’t waste your time.”

Morgause smiled at him condescendingly. She stood up and peered down at him. “You misunderstand me. I didn’t say you have to agree willingly. I’ve always been a believer in the practice of torture…” She told him, smiling widely now. “By the time I’m done with you, you’ll stop being so disagreeable.”

“You said you would give me two options. What’s the second one?” Merlin wanted to know, intent on changing the subject. Anything was better than the promise of torture.

Morgause looked momentarily disappointed, murmuring something about Merlin being a coward. She conjured a red apple in her hand and she explained to him, “The other option is that you take a bite out of this apple. But I will not tell you what it will do.”

“It’s a poisoned apple, isn’t it?” Merlin deduced. He highly doubted that it was a normal apple. Obviously it had to be poisoned.

Morgause smiled in amusement at him. “Well, you’ll just have to find out, won’t you? A coward’s way out in my opinion, but the choice is yours. I would enjoy being able to torture you, to make you pay for what you did to my sister…but alas, I will keep to my word. It’s the torture or the apple. Your choice.”

Merlin didn’t even have to debate it. He would never allow Morgause or anyone else torture him to force him to turn against Camelot, against Arthur. The idea of that was too horrible to contemplate. There was no choice. It had to be the apple.

“Give me the apple,” Merlin said, his words coming out stronger than he had expected. He sounded braver than he felt.

“Of course,” Morgause said silkily and handed him the apple.

Merlin took the offered apple and he took a bite out of it.

And then he knew no more.

~ * ~

“Ah, so the stories are true. The Lady of the Lake isn’t a fairytale after all,” Morgause said with only a hint of surprise at the dark-haired woman’s appearance.

Freya smiled softly, returning the sword in her possession to its scabbard attached at her back. She still wore the blue and purple dress Merlin had given to her over a year ago.

“Then you know that I can not die, and it would be best if you leave now,” she told Morgause, the threat light on her lips.

“You can not die again, yes. I have heard all sorts of things about you,” Morgause noted.

She tried not to appear nervous as the woman’s form, indicative of a spirit, shimmered briefly, and she could see through her transparent form. The Lady of the Lake may have once been just another human being, a Druid girl when she’d been alive, but now she was a spirit, a ghost…and Morgause had heard that the Lady of the Lake held great knowledge, more than even Morgause knew. She wasn’t one to be meddled with.

“But even if I can do nothing to you; you do realize that you can not help the boy. I will not tell you the cure,” Morgause informed her.

“Oh, I’m just here to make sure you don’t throw him down a fast-moving stream,” said Freya, shrugging. “I have to say, it does appear counterproductive for you to do such an enchantment. I thought you wanted King Uther dead?” She wondered.

“Since I’ve been made aware of Merlin’s magic, I believe it is unwise to continue with the previous course of action. It is clear to me that as long as Merlin thwarts my plans, Camelot will not fall.”

“And this is your attempt at getting Merlin out of the way. I’m surprised. You’ve grown quite clever,” Freya told her, though she sounded a bit insincere.

“And do you plan to kill the King then? To save Merlin?” Morgause asked her, looking truly curious about what the other woman planned to do.

Freya looked to Merlin, who was lying eerily still on the floor. If not for the weak rise and fall of his chest, he would be deemed dead. A sad look crossed her face as she observed him, but then she turned back to face Morgause.

Freya’s expression changed to a quietly determined one. “No, of course not. I certainly do not plan to murder anyone. I know how this will all turn out, and as such, I know that killing the King of Camelot will not be enough to awaken Merlin.”

Morgause gave a pleased smile. “Can’t have it be too easy. And though I loathe Uther, having Merlin put down is much more satisfying.”

Freya gave her a neutral look. “Yes, well. That is how you feel. Now if you would leave or I will have to show you just what Excalibur is capable of.”

“But this is where I live. I decide who stays and who goes,” Morgause argued indignantly.

Freya’s dark eyes flashed. “Then return in a few hours. You will listen to me, Morgause.”

Freya took out Excalibur again and directed the sword at the sorceress. “I have seen death and I have returned. I know more than you can fathom and this sword can kill anyone and anything… it is not a wise choice to test me. I am your superior, and you will do well to accept that truth.”

Morgause stepped back, raising her hands in a gesture of surrender. “Very well. I will do as you ask. That’s not even your sword though. I’ve heard you’re just its Keeper.”

Freya gave her a look. “The time has not yet come,” she declared. “Now, if you would leave.”

“Wait…my sister, the Lady Morgana? Have you seen her? I believe she has disappeared,” Morgause told her, still concerned about her sister’s whereabouts.

Freya gave her a piercing look before she said simply, “No.”

“No? That’s it?” Morgause was incredulous.

“We all have our parts to play,” The Lady of the Lake answered her vaguely, which didn’t appease Morgause in the slightest.

But then Freya went over to check on Merlin, signaling the end of their talk. With a frustrated sigh, Morgause called up the winds to spirit herself away.

~ * ~

“I kept my promise, Merlin,” Freya said quietly, “I’ve returned to help you as you’ve aided me in the past.”

She had placed him in a glass coffin in a secluded area of the forest near her Lake. She was unhappy about this fate that had befallen the man who had been so kind to her all those months ago.

But Freya had read the signs, the prophecies. She knew that no matter what, the destiny that Merlin, Emrys, shared with Arthur Pendragon of Camelot could not be thwarted by childish enchantments.

The wait would be long, but there was little she could do about it except to insure Merlin’s body was preserved.

~ * ~

Two years later…

“Good Knight, if I may ask, do you have news from Camelot?”

“I am no Knight, My Lady. But I am heading toward Camelot. I am Lancelot, and if the stories are true, you are the Lady of the Lake.”

Lancelot’s dark eyes settled briefly upon the scabbard, the hilt of the sword peeking from the top, which she had at her back. He climbed off his steed and he knelt down before her, kissing the top of her hand in greeting.

Freya smiled softly. “You may not be a Knight, but you certainly act like one,” she remarked as Lancelot rose to his feet.

“You’re too kind, My Lady,” he said to her, “The news from Camelot is good, My Lady. Prince Arthur will be crowned King tomorrow. The old King died not long ago.”

“Thank you. The signs have not led me astray then. Please do send a message to King Arthur. It is regarding Merlin.”

Lancelot looked at her curiously. “I thought he had disappeared. He was a good friend to me.”

“He has not disappeared,” Freya reassured him, smiling at him.

Then she told him the message she wished the King to receive.

~ * ~

Arthur steered his horse toward the spot Lancelot told him Merlin’s coffin was located.

A foggy mist cloaked the area in front of him so that Arthur could barely see what lay ahead.

A stifling guilt swept over Arthur as his blue eyes fell upon Merlin lying so still in the coffin. He wished again that he hadn’t allowed the terrible visions, so strong in their assault, to convince him to let Merlin go. If he had known, had even an inkling that this is what would befall his manservant… But it was too late for what ifs. Arthur could only hope he would do the right thing now if only to assuage his guilt in some way.

Even seeing those horrific visions of Merlin doing unthinkable acts like killing his father in cold blood, not a hint of remorse in his dark blue eyes; Arthur could not bear to see his manservant executed. It was out of the question. Arthur simply could not live with himself if he was the cause of Merlin’s death. And that fierce loyalty to the man despite seeing him murder his own father frightened Arthur at first. He did care a great deal for Merlin, but he had not realized the extent of it until the visions planted seeds of doubt in his mind.

Everything that Merlin had confided in him - about what he had used his magic for, that he had wielded his magic for Arthur’s, for Camelot’s sake - was overshadowed by his darker, more unpleasant confessions. About poisoning Morgana, releasing the Great Dragon and only defeating the magical creature by sending him away with a stern word - not killing him as Arthur had thought he himself had done.

Reasonably, Arthur knew that Merlin had poisoned Morgana to save the kingdom…as Merlin had fervently explained to him, and freeing the dragon had been the heavy price Merlin - and Camelot - had to pay. And Merlin was remorseful over what he had done, but he had been bound to a promise, he had told Arthur. He had to keep to it as he had owed the dragon a lot for providing him with (most of the time) solutions when Camelot was in trouble, when Arthur needed help.

But the visions accentuated the dark deeds Merlin had committed in Arthur’s mind. His acceptance of the unfortunate acts had been worn thin. Arthur had felt compelled to review all that Merlin had told him he had done in a more critical, colder light. Sending Merlin away from Camelot, demanding that he never return…was the most Arthur had been able to do as the visions plagued his mind, warring with his heart’s desire.

The many months - two years now - had changed Arthur. The time without Merlin’s daily presence had made Arthur yearn for him as the days wore on. The visions slowly lost their hold over him, but despite sending out his men and even going himself…Arthur had not been able to find Merlin.

He had reached the conclusion that Merlin had disappeared, or he had died and the body had been burned to ash.

But now, Arthur had learned, via Lancelot’s message, that Fate had been working against him and Merlin. That it was only now, after Arthur was crowned King, that he could seek out Merlin and return him to his rightful place.

At Arthur’s side where he belonged.

Arthur had wanted to ride out immediately to find Merlin, but he could not leave with the coronation celebrations underway. He had been busy with meetings with the nobility and kings from across the land, a knighting ceremony (in which Lancelot and Gwaine were knighted along with a host of other men) and there had been matters of state to attend to. Of course, the feasts and ceremonial festivities could not be missed. He was the new King of Camelot after all, and everyone would have noticed and questioned his absence if he had left in the middle of the festivities.

As was the case, it was almost two weeks later that Arthur was able to ride out to the location Lancelot had relayed to him, to where Merlin was. The place Merlin had been hidden all this time had been magically cloaked by the mysterious Lady of the Lake. That had been the reason why Arthur had not come upon the spot and discovered Merlin. The location was not all that far from Camelot - a fact that frustrated Arthur. Merlin had been right under his nose this whole time and Arthur hadn’t been aware of it.

Feeling his uncertainty sharply, Arthur opened the lid of the glass coffin, sucking in a deep, anticipatory breath as he looked upon Merlin.

He looked unchanged from when Arthur last saw him two years ago. Though his skin was paler, ghastly so, and while his chest rose and fell, Arthur could tell that his breathing was shallow. He had been teetering between life and death for two long years - not quite alive, but not dead either.

Arthur wasn’t sure exactly how that worked, but the some matters of magic were, as yet, a mystery to him. He did plan to lift the ban on magic once he returned to Camelot with Merlin. It was the least he could do after the fate that had befallen Merlin for these many months.

He bent down, trying not to think too much about those childish fairy stories Morgana subjected him to when they were younger. Lancelot had told him, with confidence, that the Lady of the Lake had assured him that this was the true cure to awaken Merlin.

No matter how silly Arthur felt, just now, the King of Camelot would not let that stop him from saving a good friend.

So Arthur pressed his lips to Merlin’s, the kiss not a kiss, but more of a soft brush of lips.

He watched Merlin intently, looking for any sign that the gesture had proved successful.

For several long, harrowing moments; nothing happened.

“Merlin, please, wake up,” Arthur pleaded with him, “I’m sorry for turning you away… I - if I have to kiss you one more time…” He said in mild exasperation, not wishing to get too emotional or else his words to Merlin all that time ago…about no man being worth his tears would have been a terrible lie.

He didn’t want Merlin to see him contradicting those very words. Arthur expected that Merlin would never let it go.

Arthur supposed that maybe a brush of the lips didn’t qualify as a kiss. It was all rather unfortunate that the Lady of the Lake hadn't told Lancelot in detail how exactly the kiss should go.

And really, True Love’s Kiss? Arthur doubted that Merlin considered Arthur so highly, especially after what Arthur had done to him.

With a shrug to himself, Arthur kissed Merlin again, this time licking Merlin’s lips as his tongue teased his way into Merlin’s mouth.

Arthur saw Merlin’s eyes open, and a wave of relief and happiness swept through Arthur. To his bemused surprise, Merlin placed his hands on either side of Arthur’s head, keeping him there when the king sought to break contact.

“Stay,” Merlin murmured so softly, only Arthur’s proximity allowed him to catch the whispered word.

Merlin sat up, and he returned Arthur’s kiss with a shocking enthusiasm despite being barely alive for two long years.

“Merlin, Merlin… I’m sorry,” Arthur intoned, pulling away from him reluctantly.

“No, Arthur. Don’t say that. You had been affected by magic to see those visions - they weren’t your own. I think Morgause and Morgana--”

“I don’t think Morgana is working with Morgause anymore, Merlin,” Arthur cut in, informing him, “Though I know little more than that. She - Morgause - came to Camelot not long ago and started raging, demanding to know where her sister was. She said that she didn’t know what Morgana was up to, and she was ‘concerned’ about her. I had asked her about you, if she had come upon you…but Morgause would not answer on that query. I grew heavily suspicious that she had crossed paths with you. I remember what you told me about your tense relations with her, and I did not doubt Morgause would seek an opportunity to harm you if she encountered you.”

“So Morgana has really disappeared then?” Merlin asked, curious.

Arthur shook his head. “There have been…sightings, so to speak. But Morgana would not allow anyone to approach her. She is always seen from a distance and she usually rides on a dark steed. She vanishes before another person could reach her. I’ve never seen her myself. As her brother, I’m not too happy, as you can imagine, that she wouldn’t allow me this one small courtesy - to see with my own eyes that she’s still alive. I wouldn’t be surprised if Morgana is in league with the Lady of the Lake now. The two of them are making brilliant work of being mysterious. It’s quite irritating,” Arthur said, frowning slightly.

Merlin looked at him, intrigued. “The Lady of the Lake? Who is she?”

Arthur rubbed the back of his head as if he were reluctant to admit to something. He said, “The story is that she’s a deity, a goddess of magic. She is neither good nor bad, but she just is…that’s what everyone agrees upon. And she was the one who looked after you these past two years.”

Merlin stared at him, aghast. He moved to extricate himself from the coffin. Arthur reached forward to grip Merlin’s arms, so he would stay in the coffin.

“Two years? Two years! How is that even possible?” Merlin demanded.

He forcefully removed himself from Arthur’s hold on him and exited the coffin.

“Merlin…your legs are going to be weak,” Arthur said urgently.

And true to the king’s word, Merlin felt dizzy and off-balance as he tried to stand on solid ground.

His legs felt useless, unable to support his weight, and he collapsed to the ground, sitting on his knees.

Arthur sat down beside him. “You’re going to need my help, Merlin. I’ll take you back to Camelot. You’ll be safe there. I promise you, Merlin.”

Merlin could not miss the honesty in Arthur’s blue eyes, like blue fire they were, his eyes were that bright as they looked into Merlin’s own.

Merlin did not know what to say. A wealth of emotion overcame him. He could not believe such a long time had passed and he had missed all of it.

“I’m King now, Merlin. And I won’t disappoint you,” Arthur reassured him fervently.

“King?” Merlin uttered, the word slow to sink in - King, Arthur’s King now. But when it did, Merlin’s eyes filled with tears he refused to let fall.

“Arthur…” he only managed to say.

Arthur embraced him as Merlin trembled, unable to accept how time had moved on without him in such a way, in his arms. Eventually, Merlin could not stop his tears from flowing and he wept, clinging to Arthur in a desperate attempt to hold on to something solid, something true.

“I had to eat the poisoned apple, Arthur…I had no choice. Morgause was threatening to torture me until I cooperated with her. And I could never use my magic against you, against Camelot. But I had no idea that the apple would do this…” he said earnestly.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, Merlin. I’m just grateful the Lady of the Lake made sure you were all right and told me where you were. I wish I could have aided you sooner though,” Arthur said regretfully.

“Fate is a cruel mistress,” Merlin said sadly, feeling warm and comfortable within Arthur’s embrace.

Arthur gave him a small smile. He kissed him on the top of the head as if Merlin was a small child, which caused Merlin to glare at him.

Arthur only laughed good-naturedly and helped Merlin up. Merlin leaned heavily on Arthur for support as they made their way to Arthur’s horse. When Arthur offered Merlin food and drink, Merlin realized then how hungry and thirsty he was.

But his confusion about how he had been able to stay alive -- or half-alive really -- in such a state, lying in a coffin, for all those months, was set aside at that moment for something he could understand.

They were going home.

~ * ~

When Merlin and Arthur arrived at the castle, Gwen rushed down the castle entrance stairs, her face a picture of relief and joy.

Arthur helped Merlin to climb off his steed and then Gwen hugged Merlin warmly.

“Oh, I’m so glad Arthur found you. Oh, Merlin. I was so worried about you,” she told him earnestly.

Merlin noted the fancy gown that Gwen now wore. A lot had changed in the time he had been away, and Merlin knew he was going to have a time of it adjusting to the new situation.

It was weird, he thought, that he should feel so drowsy and heavy now even after being under an enchanted sleep for so long. He hated this helpless feeling, but yet he gratefully accepted Gwen and Arthur’s assistance, one person on either side of him, as they walked up the stairs. Merlin smiled at Gwen and told her that he was glad that she was looking well. And he reassured her that he would be all right, but Gwen had that look on her face.

Merlin just knew that she would be fussing over him now, making it her personal goal to return him to good health.

Merlin didn’t mind in the end. It was nice to be among friends again. In the evenings, Arthur would sit by his bed and tell him what he had missed in his two years’ absence.

~ * ~

“I’m surprised you didn’t stay to welcome Merlin back to Camelot, Lancelot,” Gwaine remarked.

The two knights were taking a break in a forest near one of Camelot’s outlying villages. Their horses were drinking from the stream a few feet away.

Lancelot shrugged. He looked to Gwaine. “I didn’t want to get in the way. Gwen is sure to fuss over Merlin… and Arthur will be - well...”

“-Arthur,” Gwaine said matter-of-factly.

He took a swig of drink from his leather drinking pouch.

Lancelot nodded. He finished off the apple he had been eating and threw the core toward a thick oak tree some distance away.

“Good throw,” Gwaine remarked, grinning cheekily.

“I suppose you could do better?” Lancelot asked.

Gwaine spread his arms out. “Hey, I did get us out here after citing a fabricated threat. I don’t need to prove anything,” he countered.

Lancelot shook his head wryly. “Arthur was distracted with getting to Merlin, you know that. You could have informed him that flying horses were attacking a village and he would have shrugged it off.”

Gwaine only laughed. “True, true," he conceded, "Remember that manticore we defeated the first time we met?”

“I still don’t know how we managed it,” Lancelot confided in him. “Last time I needed Merlin’s help to defeat a magical creature, that griffin.”

“Magic tricks can be useful, but we proved that we can do without it. Knights of Camelot, eh? Counts for something. With Arthur as King, things should be looking up,” Gwaine remarked.

Lancelot was about to answer him, when he sat up suddenly.

He pointed up ahead. “Gwaine, isn’t that--?” He asked.

Gwaine turned to peer in the direction Lancelot was pointing in. “Ah, the elusive sorceress. She’s going to vanish like always, I bet you,” Gwaine pointed out to him.

But oddly enough, ten feet away from them, Morgana still remained. She was astride a black horse and wearing a deep purple cloak, the hood down, and her dark hair flowed down her back.

She looked in their direction and nodded in acknowledgement at the two knights.

“I think we should follow her,” Gwaine declared.

Lancelot stared at him. “Like you said, the Lady Morgana is going to disappear. That has been the pattern.”

“Yes, but she looks like she’s waiting for us to follow her. She keeps looking at us expectantly, Lancelot…” Gwaine tried to persuade him.

“We don’t have any idea what her agenda is and what she wants from us. She may have stopped working with her sister, but that doesn’t mean the Lady Morgana is now loyal to Camelot,” Lancelot reasoned out.

Gwaine looked undeterred. He drank some more from his pouch and stood up, heading toward his horse.

“Heading into potential danger? That sounds like a bloody good idea to me. Come on, Lancelot. You know you want to,” Gwaine urged him.

Lancelot gave a disgruntled sigh as he watched Gwaine climb up on his steed.

“Fine, all right,” he gave in, going to his horse.

Gwaine looked a bit smug.

As soon as they were both on their respective brown steeds, they saw Morgana nod at them again and then she set her horse at a gallop.

They followed her.

~ * ~

And one day, not long after Merlin’s return, he and Arthur went to see the Lady of the Lake.

It was finally time for Arthur to receive Excalibur.

~ * ~

A Better World Part 1: http://dk323.livejournal.com/139622.html