Halloween Reviews
And now, for a mixed bag.
Dark Carpathians - Christine Feehan By all that is unholy, do these things reek. I would rather sit naked in a hot tub full of fire ants while being struck repeatedly on the head with a mallet and watching Carrot Top's Greatest Hits than read one of these books again. There are eighteen novels in this series, published over a span of eight years. This is possible because every single one is the exact same book, with only the names of the guilty protagonists changed. And every single one features a nigh-omnipotent, overbearing male "romantic interest" who literally clings to the heroine like kudzu on a lamp post while chuckling about her quaint, exasperating modern ways and calling her "little one" telepathically. I have not the words to fully express how strenuously you should avoid this fetid, steaming pile of yak droppings. I feel like taking a shower just from thinking about them long enough to write this paragraph. Avoid! Avoid! Avoid!!
the Hollows - Kim Harrison Another urban fantasy setting, where witches, vampires, werewolves, and assorted faery-folk live alongside regular humans. Or semi-alongside. In the world of the Hollows a genetically engineered virus got out of control, infecting tomato plants, and wiping out 1/4 of the human population approximately 40 years before the events of the first book. This brought the human population down roughly level with the supernatural population, leading the supernaturals to reveal themselves. (The infrastructure of the world would have collapsed without them, with 1/4 of humanity dead or dying, and the other 3/4 badly incapacitated.) Now the supernaturals (called Inderlanders) tend to live on one side of the cities while the humans live on the other. The protagonist of the series is Rachel Morgan, a practicing witch (witches being a seperate species who have an enzyme in their blood that allows them to activate potions and charms) and former agent for the Inderland police force who has quit to open a private investigations firm with her two partners, Ivy (vampire) and Jenks (pixie). The titles of the books are all homages to Clint Eastwood westerns - Dead Witch Walking, The Good, The Bad, And The Undead, Every Which Way But Dead, A Fistful of Charms, For a Few Demons More and the upcoming the Outlaw Demon Wails.
So far the series has been enjoyable, if a bit predictable and derivative. (For example, the species of one of the main antagonists is a big plot point for the first three books, yet there was a flashing neon sign over his head saying what he was from his first appearance in Book 1.) Rachel has been powering up to an alarming degree, which gives me pause about the direction the series is taking, but I still recommend it, with some hesitation. Don't expect greatness, but it is entertaining.
Southern Vampires (Sookie Stackhouse) - Charlaine Harris Sookie Stackhouse is a barmaid in a small Louisiana town who has been plagued all her life by what she calls "her disability". Sookie is a telepath, of the read-only variety. She finds herself drawn to vampires (whose existance is publically known) and shapeshifters (who aren't), because unlike humans, she can't easily read their minds, and therefore finds their company more relaxing. They, in turn, are drawn to her because... I'll get to that in a minute.
The problem with this series is a lack of consistency. Characters tend to have sudden personality swings, and there's too many red herrings. The last couple of novels have had some rather cheap plot devices, such as the revelation that Sookie has some faery blood, which is what makes her so irresistable to vampires, in particular. Also, there's too damn many love interests, potential love interests, and past love interests that might be potential love interests again to keep straight. Despite all that, it's not really a romance series at all. Like the Hollows, I recommend with some caveats. Not great, but so far still entertaining enough to be worth the read.
Queen Betsy - MaryJanice Davidson I can't decide if I utterly hate these, or if they're an unintentionally brilliant parody of both the paranormal romance and chick-lit genres. (I don't think the parody is deliberate.) The heroine is Elizabeth "Betsy" Taylor, who, shortly after an attack by a mob of naked, slavering, muddy creatures who bite her repeatedly, is hit by a SUV on her 30th birthday, and wakes up undead in the morgue. She finds out she meets all the criteria for the new Queen of the Vampires, as set out in the Necronomicon an ancient book of vampire prophecy written in blood and bound in human skin. But Betsy is really more concerned with acquiring shoes.
Like I said, I still haven't decided if I hate these utterly or find them strangely amusing. Don't buy them new, get them used or check them out from the library if you feel inclined. They're very, very short, almost novella length.
Count Saint-Germain - Chelsea Quinn Yarbro This series is really three in one, the main series mostly featuring the Count, plus two shorter series of side novels focusing on two of his lovers/proteges. There are a lot of these books, the first being written in 1978, and I haven't read all of them, they're not easy to find even when they're newly published. If the Dresden Files are the alternative to Anita Blake, then Yarbro's novels are the alternative to Anne Rice. Most of them are set in the past (the Count has been kicking around for close to 4,000 years) and are full of rich, historical detail. They can also be somewhat dry. I hesitate to give a full recommendation because I haven't read them all, and they are so hard to find.
Blood/Smoke and Shadows - Tanya Huff A series about former Toronto police detective Vicki Nelson, who left her job because of a progressive eye disease, who becomes involved with vampire Henry Fitzroy, the bastard son of Henry VIII. It's been a long, long time since I read these. Pretty sure I liked them. I'm sure the originals are long out of print, but Wikipedia says there are omnibus editions, most likely as a tie-in to the Lifetime series based off them.
Done for tonight. (I can hear you cheering :-P )
Dark Carpathians - Christine Feehan By all that is unholy, do these things reek. I would rather sit naked in a hot tub full of fire ants while being struck repeatedly on the head with a mallet and watching Carrot Top's Greatest Hits than read one of these books again. There are eighteen novels in this series, published over a span of eight years. This is possible because every single one is the exact same book, with only the names of the guilty protagonists changed. And every single one features a nigh-omnipotent, overbearing male "romantic interest" who literally clings to the heroine like kudzu on a lamp post while chuckling about her quaint, exasperating modern ways and calling her "little one" telepathically. I have not the words to fully express how strenuously you should avoid this fetid, steaming pile of yak droppings. I feel like taking a shower just from thinking about them long enough to write this paragraph. Avoid! Avoid! Avoid!!
the Hollows - Kim Harrison Another urban fantasy setting, where witches, vampires, werewolves, and assorted faery-folk live alongside regular humans. Or semi-alongside. In the world of the Hollows a genetically engineered virus got out of control, infecting tomato plants, and wiping out 1/4 of the human population approximately 40 years before the events of the first book. This brought the human population down roughly level with the supernatural population, leading the supernaturals to reveal themselves. (The infrastructure of the world would have collapsed without them, with 1/4 of humanity dead or dying, and the other 3/4 badly incapacitated.) Now the supernaturals (called Inderlanders) tend to live on one side of the cities while the humans live on the other. The protagonist of the series is Rachel Morgan, a practicing witch (witches being a seperate species who have an enzyme in their blood that allows them to activate potions and charms) and former agent for the Inderland police force who has quit to open a private investigations firm with her two partners, Ivy (vampire) and Jenks (pixie). The titles of the books are all homages to Clint Eastwood westerns - Dead Witch Walking, The Good, The Bad, And The Undead, Every Which Way But Dead, A Fistful of Charms, For a Few Demons More and the upcoming the Outlaw Demon Wails.
So far the series has been enjoyable, if a bit predictable and derivative. (For example, the species of one of the main antagonists is a big plot point for the first three books, yet there was a flashing neon sign over his head saying what he was from his first appearance in Book 1.) Rachel has been powering up to an alarming degree, which gives me pause about the direction the series is taking, but I still recommend it, with some hesitation. Don't expect greatness, but it is entertaining.
Southern Vampires (Sookie Stackhouse) - Charlaine Harris Sookie Stackhouse is a barmaid in a small Louisiana town who has been plagued all her life by what she calls "her disability". Sookie is a telepath, of the read-only variety. She finds herself drawn to vampires (whose existance is publically known) and shapeshifters (who aren't), because unlike humans, she can't easily read their minds, and therefore finds their company more relaxing. They, in turn, are drawn to her because... I'll get to that in a minute.
The problem with this series is a lack of consistency. Characters tend to have sudden personality swings, and there's too many red herrings. The last couple of novels have had some rather cheap plot devices, such as the revelation that Sookie has some faery blood, which is what makes her so irresistable to vampires, in particular. Also, there's too damn many love interests, potential love interests, and past love interests that might be potential love interests again to keep straight. Despite all that, it's not really a romance series at all. Like the Hollows, I recommend with some caveats. Not great, but so far still entertaining enough to be worth the read.
Queen Betsy - MaryJanice Davidson I can't decide if I utterly hate these, or if they're an unintentionally brilliant parody of both the paranormal romance and chick-lit genres. (I don't think the parody is deliberate.) The heroine is Elizabeth "Betsy" Taylor, who, shortly after an attack by a mob of naked, slavering, muddy creatures who bite her repeatedly, is hit by a SUV on her 30th birthday, and wakes up undead in the morgue. She finds out she meets all the criteria for the new Queen of the Vampires, as set out in the Necronomicon an ancient book of vampire prophecy written in blood and bound in human skin. But Betsy is really more concerned with acquiring shoes.
Like I said, I still haven't decided if I hate these utterly or find them strangely amusing. Don't buy them new, get them used or check them out from the library if you feel inclined. They're very, very short, almost novella length.
Count Saint-Germain - Chelsea Quinn Yarbro This series is really three in one, the main series mostly featuring the Count, plus two shorter series of side novels focusing on two of his lovers/proteges. There are a lot of these books, the first being written in 1978, and I haven't read all of them, they're not easy to find even when they're newly published. If the Dresden Files are the alternative to Anita Blake, then Yarbro's novels are the alternative to Anne Rice. Most of them are set in the past (the Count has been kicking around for close to 4,000 years) and are full of rich, historical detail. They can also be somewhat dry. I hesitate to give a full recommendation because I haven't read them all, and they are so hard to find.
Blood/Smoke and Shadows - Tanya Huff A series about former Toronto police detective Vicki Nelson, who left her job because of a progressive eye disease, who becomes involved with vampire Henry Fitzroy, the bastard son of Henry VIII. It's been a long, long time since I read these. Pretty sure I liked them. I'm sure the originals are long out of print, but Wikipedia says there are omnibus editions, most likely as a tie-in to the Lifetime series based off them.
Done for tonight. (I can hear you cheering :-P )