Sounds to me like you DID learn at least something from what happened before, or you wouldn't be worried now. You've still got to be vigilant, though. I hope you weren't expecting being a grown-up not to suck.
In most circumstances, and with most people, time changes the outlook. You often look back at yourself and think of memories where you "wish you would have done this", or "wish you wouldn't have said that." Even though what feels good doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel good at all later. Especially when it hurts someone that's extremely close to you. Maybe it takes a while for you to realize this, but one day it hits you like a ton of bricks and its nothing less of crippling.
I've always tried to do what's right, because while it may not be what your heart is telling you, your mind knows that things will just get worse from there out. Communication is key. Listening to your partner when they try and communicate with you is even more imperative, lest you realize that you've done nothing but neglect the woman who is trying only to love you. A false sense of security is a major issue; Do whatever you can to resolve it immediately. This is your time to learn now, don't mess it up.
For what it's worth, I'm sorry for my involvement in it. I was a mess at that point. I was confused, immature, selfish, lonely, had no idea what -I- wanted...and trying to jump into anything with anyone wasn't a good idea. I should've known better.
Eric said it better than I can, but communication is definitely important. If you're not happy, even if it's something minor...speak up. If you can't talk about the small things, how will you ever be able to talk about the big things? Beyond that...you really never struck me as the kind of person that would go around cheating. What made that particular time different? Loneliness, being bored with the relationship, a combination of things? I think that's the root of the issue, personally; not that you cheated, but why you cheated, and what you could do to make sure you never end up in that kind of situation again.
I don't think anyone can really predict who they will be in the future-or what they'll do, or who they'll be with, etc. I think the only big prevention to that is to be aware of your own strengths and weaknesses as a person at that time, and do what you can to work on it. Or, if it's compromising situations, how to stay out of those or change them
( ... )
Comments 4
Reply
I've always tried to do what's right, because while it may not be what your heart is telling you, your mind knows that things will just get worse from there out. Communication is key. Listening to your partner when they try and communicate with you is even more imperative, lest you realize that you've done nothing but neglect the woman who is trying only to love you. A false sense of security is a major issue; Do whatever you can to resolve it immediately. This is your time to learn now, don't mess it up.
Reply
Eric said it better than I can, but communication is definitely important. If you're not happy, even if it's something minor...speak up. If you can't talk about the small things, how will you ever be able to talk about the big things? Beyond that...you really never struck me as the kind of person that would go around cheating. What made that particular time different? Loneliness, being bored with the relationship, a combination of things? I think that's the root of the issue, personally; not that you cheated, but why you cheated, and what you could do to make sure you never end up in that kind of situation again.
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment