Unexpected Mullet-verse fic.
Title: In The AM
Fandom: Justice League
Characters: Jon and Danny Carter-Kord
Word Count: 455
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Because I read a fic where someone got woken up by a phone. Twice. And Jon decided to be groggy in my head. So ta-da! Fic.
(Jon swears in Esperanto in this. Translations at the bottom. If anyone knows the code for how to make text show up when you hold the mouse over words, I'd appreciate a heads-up. I can't remember how to do it.)
In The AM
The phone is ringing and Jon decides this is grounds for justifiable homicide. Picking it up, he presses the slim length of plastic to his ear.
"Die," he greets the caller.
"Hi, Jon." It's Danny.
"Suffer," Jon amends.
"Uh huh, hey do you know exactly how we're related to Spooky?"
Jon cracks open an eye to stare at the far wall, eyebrows twisting in hazy disbelief. "Y'drunk?"
"...Nooo."
"High?"
"Jon--"
"S'pervillain?"
"...Jon, were you asleep?"
"Kreteno," Jon grumbles, closing his eyes.
"Jon, how long have you been asleep?"
"Time's it?"
"Huh, I don't actually--Wait a sec.... Three. Oh-six."
Jon rolls onto his back with a groan. "Merdo."
"You're in a mood."
"Anusulo."
"Jeez, okay, okay. You don't have to bite my head off."
"Two hours, Danny. Been sleeping two hours. Was awake for...thirty...something. Seven? Bigger than a breadbox."
"Oh. Ouch."
"Hate you." Jon sighs and rolls onto his other side, squashing the small phone between his ear and the pillow. "Wha'ja want?"
"Well it just hit me," Danny says thoughtfully. "Technically, Uncle Max is Dad's nephew. So is Spooky still our cousin?"
Jon thinks it over, fuzzy-edged images of family trees blurring past his mind's eye. "...First cousin once removed?"
"You think?"
Jon raises a hand to scratch an itch on the back of his head. "...Yes?"
There is silence from Danny and Jon thinks maybe his brother hung up and he missed the end call beep. His body is just starting to settle back into the thick heaviness of sleep when Danny asks, "Are you sure?"
Jon's arm flops back onto the bed and he rolls onto his back, eyes staring blearily at the ceiling. "Damne anusulo."
"I'm just asking!"
"Two h'rs verz th'rty...seven-thing, Daniel Oriole. Tiiired."
"Well how was I supposed to know, Jonathan Indivar?"
Jon sighs and closes his eyes, reaching up to take hold of the phone again. "Ask Spooky."
"But--" Danny's protest is cut off as Jon presses the button to end the call.
Seconds stretch into minutes as Jon tries to remember what he was going to do. When he remembers, he lifts his arm, phone in hand, and flings the small plastic torture device at the wall. Hard. Hopefully the clattering sound he hears means it no longer works.
Settling back against his pillow, Jon closes his eyes to return to sleep.
Ten minutes later his tired eyes open, then narrow. Pushing himself up from his comfortable bed, Jon scrubs a hand over his face and hair.
He has to find his qwerty-pad and type himself a note that he has to kill Danny. Then maybe he can make some progress on the calculations he's been working on.
It's going to be a long night.
-----
Esperanto translations:
kreteno = idiot, moron
merdo = shit
anusulo = asshole
damne anusulo = damned asshole
(Note, Oriole and Indivar are Danny and Jon's middle names, respectively. ^_^)
Fandom: Justice League
Characters: Jon and Danny Carter-Kord
Word Count: 455
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Because I read a fic where someone got woken up by a phone. Twice. And Jon decided to be groggy in my head. So ta-da! Fic.
(Jon swears in Esperanto in this. Translations at the bottom. If anyone knows the code for how to make text show up when you hold the mouse over words, I'd appreciate a heads-up. I can't remember how to do it.)
In The AM
The phone is ringing and Jon decides this is grounds for justifiable homicide. Picking it up, he presses the slim length of plastic to his ear.
"Die," he greets the caller.
"Hi, Jon." It's Danny.
"Suffer," Jon amends.
"Uh huh, hey do you know exactly how we're related to Spooky?"
Jon cracks open an eye to stare at the far wall, eyebrows twisting in hazy disbelief. "Y'drunk?"
"...Nooo."
"High?"
"Jon--"
"S'pervillain?"
"...Jon, were you asleep?"
"Kreteno," Jon grumbles, closing his eyes.
"Jon, how long have you been asleep?"
"Time's it?"
"Huh, I don't actually--Wait a sec.... Three. Oh-six."
Jon rolls onto his back with a groan. "Merdo."
"You're in a mood."
"Anusulo."
"Jeez, okay, okay. You don't have to bite my head off."
"Two hours, Danny. Been sleeping two hours. Was awake for...thirty...something. Seven? Bigger than a breadbox."
"Oh. Ouch."
"Hate you." Jon sighs and rolls onto his other side, squashing the small phone between his ear and the pillow. "Wha'ja want?"
"Well it just hit me," Danny says thoughtfully. "Technically, Uncle Max is Dad's nephew. So is Spooky still our cousin?"
Jon thinks it over, fuzzy-edged images of family trees blurring past his mind's eye. "...First cousin once removed?"
"You think?"
Jon raises a hand to scratch an itch on the back of his head. "...Yes?"
There is silence from Danny and Jon thinks maybe his brother hung up and he missed the end call beep. His body is just starting to settle back into the thick heaviness of sleep when Danny asks, "Are you sure?"
Jon's arm flops back onto the bed and he rolls onto his back, eyes staring blearily at the ceiling. "Damne anusulo."
"I'm just asking!"
"Two h'rs verz th'rty...seven-thing, Daniel Oriole. Tiiired."
"Well how was I supposed to know, Jonathan Indivar?"
Jon sighs and closes his eyes, reaching up to take hold of the phone again. "Ask Spooky."
"But--" Danny's protest is cut off as Jon presses the button to end the call.
Seconds stretch into minutes as Jon tries to remember what he was going to do. When he remembers, he lifts his arm, phone in hand, and flings the small plastic torture device at the wall. Hard. Hopefully the clattering sound he hears means it no longer works.
Settling back against his pillow, Jon closes his eyes to return to sleep.
Ten minutes later his tired eyes open, then narrow. Pushing himself up from his comfortable bed, Jon scrubs a hand over his face and hair.
He has to find his qwerty-pad and type himself a note that he has to kill Danny. Then maybe he can make some progress on the calculations he's been working on.
It's going to be a long night.
-----
Esperanto translations:
kreteno = idiot, moron
merdo = shit
anusulo = asshole
damne anusulo = damned asshole
(Note, Oriole and Indivar are Danny and Jon's middle names, respectively. ^_^)