Triple J Hotest 100 (or, why I hate Australian music)
ON Australia day, Triple J brings out the Hottest 100. The "definitive" list of what was the best new released music of the last year, world-wide.
(NB: when I say "definitive", I add the disclaimer that this is a (listener voted) poll run by the radio station with the highest credibility as a quality popular music station for the under 35's . I make this assumption as it is a non-commercial station and broadcasts Aust-wide)
As such, one could fairly assume that the poll would represent a broad spectrum of quality music chosen by people with good taste.
I must say, on the whole, I am disappointed.
Now, If you have looked at my user info, you would have seen a long list of bands, most of which are not Australian, and most of which would comfortably fit into the "heavy metal" category. Triple J is not a metal station and as such I have no preconceived ideas about a full metal 100. I'll leave that to Metal Hammer magazine. Also that's not my point.
1- Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out
Cool band, great song (admittedly), not Australian. (I don't actually have a problem with the number one, FF have been hitting all the airwaves with this song, and if another top band wants to cover a song the year it came out (Scissor Sisters no. 44 -ED) then you know your on a winner.
2 Missy Higgins - Scar
Australian, Solo. Low tempo, folksy, piano driven, immature singing voice, no emotion displayed. CRAP
3 Eskimo Joe - From The Sea
Australian, Band. Guitar based (where's the bass in the mix?), rolling sap love song. Written to impress chicks in bars for root action. No emotion/exertion displayed. CRAP
4 The Killers - Somebody Told Me
Absolute Gold. Driving rhythm, good tempo, interesting (sing-along-able) lyrics. Great use of keyboards. Fresh sound. Not Australian (Las Vegas, USA?)
5 Spiderbait - Black Betty
Australian. (Somehow got bass in the mix!) had to cover an old song to get a hit, and badly. Their second single (no. 20 -ED) had to use a gimmick (swearing, often) to get airplay, but as a result sounds absolutely useless on any censored (i.e. all of it) radio. Nice marketing. NOT! CRAP
6 Missy Higgins - Ten Days
See number 2, the differences are negligible. CRAP
7 John Butler Trio - Something Gotta Give
Australian. John Butler is a tree hugging, pot smoking hippie (see the Kekovitch post -ED) who has significant talent with the guitar. Unfortunately he wastes it on acoustic anti western folk songs for his dole bludging brethren. Realize the soap and sing your fans into getting a job! Would probably claim Kumbyah if he could. CRAP
8 Little Birdy - Beautiful To Me
Australian. Built on the foundation of a gimmick (the vocalist is a female version of Tiny Tim, to high for his gender and a little squeaky). Meandering tempo, can't understand the lyrics, no bass, folksy, repetitive. CRAP
9 Powderfinger - Bless My Soul
Australian. These boys would like to think of themselves as the mainstays of Australian Rock. The fact that Jimmy Barnes still sings releases that title of any status. Rollicking, guitar-y, pub rock (good quality's), with no bass, a lack of effort in the vocals and no hook. And as my father says, they present themselves like a mob of drongos. DONE BETTER
Of the rest...
Excellent-> 13,23,39,58,92
Good-> 18,19,28 (how did beastie boys end up this low?) ,29,44,50,53,75(Australian),88
OK-> 10,17,31,37,41,46,47 (Australian),95,99
Poor-> 21,22,34,35,63,82
CRAP-> 11,12,14-16,20,24-27,30,32,33,36,40,42,43,45,48,49,51,52,54-57,59-62,64-74,76-81,83-87,89-91,93,94,96-98,100 Have a wild guess how many of these are Australian)
What the hell are they doing in this list? 38 (U2 - Vertigogo. I mean really...)
At times like this I wonder if the whole world is doomed, or are you all just looking at us and laughing?
I want to be in a place where the songwriters are the song singers and they give me the delivery that tells me that they care enough to push themselves to say what they want to say. I want production that pushes the boundaries and finds the nuances that press themselves into the back of your scull and stay there for so long you get distracted by it all throughout the day. I want music that scares me. I want music that brings a tear to my eye. I want a groove that forces my movement to it's deep rut and makes me sweat. I want a song that gives me goose bumps when I hear it 15 years after I first heard it. I want the un-expected. I want the un-safe. I want chord progressions and time
changes and tempo changes and syncopation.
Why can't Australian music give me that?
Why has the only band in Australia to give me that with their debut album all but disbanded and now the lead singer makes pseudo-intellegent folksy crap with a second rate DJ and roots an ex-soapie pop chick?
Why is the most popular Australian band on the international stage at the moment a group that was formed well before I was born?
Why does all the decent Australian pop come from the UK (Yes, Kylie is highly formed pop music, and worthy of great respect, if not admiration)
What the Sweet F is going on?!?
(NB: when I say "definitive", I add the disclaimer that this is a (listener voted) poll run by the radio station with the highest credibility as a quality popular music station for the under 35's . I make this assumption as it is a non-commercial station and broadcasts Aust-wide)
As such, one could fairly assume that the poll would represent a broad spectrum of quality music chosen by people with good taste.
I must say, on the whole, I am disappointed.
Now, If you have looked at my user info, you would have seen a long list of bands, most of which are not Australian, and most of which would comfortably fit into the "heavy metal" category. Triple J is not a metal station and as such I have no preconceived ideas about a full metal 100. I'll leave that to Metal Hammer magazine. Also that's not my point.
1- Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out
Cool band, great song (admittedly), not Australian. (I don't actually have a problem with the number one, FF have been hitting all the airwaves with this song, and if another top band wants to cover a song the year it came out (Scissor Sisters no. 44 -ED) then you know your on a winner.
2 Missy Higgins - Scar
Australian, Solo. Low tempo, folksy, piano driven, immature singing voice, no emotion displayed. CRAP
3 Eskimo Joe - From The Sea
Australian, Band. Guitar based (where's the bass in the mix?), rolling sap love song. Written to impress chicks in bars for root action. No emotion/exertion displayed. CRAP
4 The Killers - Somebody Told Me
Absolute Gold. Driving rhythm, good tempo, interesting (sing-along-able) lyrics. Great use of keyboards. Fresh sound. Not Australian (Las Vegas, USA?)
5 Spiderbait - Black Betty
Australian. (Somehow got bass in the mix!) had to cover an old song to get a hit, and badly. Their second single (no. 20 -ED) had to use a gimmick (swearing, often) to get airplay, but as a result sounds absolutely useless on any censored (i.e. all of it) radio. Nice marketing. NOT! CRAP
6 Missy Higgins - Ten Days
See number 2, the differences are negligible. CRAP
7 John Butler Trio - Something Gotta Give
Australian. John Butler is a tree hugging, pot smoking hippie (see the Kekovitch post -ED) who has significant talent with the guitar. Unfortunately he wastes it on acoustic anti western folk songs for his dole bludging brethren. Realize the soap and sing your fans into getting a job! Would probably claim Kumbyah if he could. CRAP
8 Little Birdy - Beautiful To Me
Australian. Built on the foundation of a gimmick (the vocalist is a female version of Tiny Tim, to high for his gender and a little squeaky). Meandering tempo, can't understand the lyrics, no bass, folksy, repetitive. CRAP
9 Powderfinger - Bless My Soul
Australian. These boys would like to think of themselves as the mainstays of Australian Rock. The fact that Jimmy Barnes still sings releases that title of any status. Rollicking, guitar-y, pub rock (good quality's), with no bass, a lack of effort in the vocals and no hook. And as my father says, they present themselves like a mob of drongos. DONE BETTER
Of the rest...
Excellent-> 13,23,39,58,92
Good-> 18,19,28 (how did beastie boys end up this low?) ,29,44,50,53,75(Australian),88
OK-> 10,17,31,37,41,46,47 (Australian),95,99
Poor-> 21,22,34,35,63,82
CRAP-> 11,12,14-16,20,24-27,30,32,33,36,40,42,43,45,48,49,51,52,54-57,59-62,64-74,76-81,83-87,89-91,93,94,96-98,100 Have a wild guess how many of these are Australian)
What the hell are they doing in this list? 38 (U2 - Vertigogo. I mean really...)
At times like this I wonder if the whole world is doomed, or are you all just looking at us and laughing?
I want to be in a place where the songwriters are the song singers and they give me the delivery that tells me that they care enough to push themselves to say what they want to say. I want production that pushes the boundaries and finds the nuances that press themselves into the back of your scull and stay there for so long you get distracted by it all throughout the day. I want music that scares me. I want music that brings a tear to my eye. I want a groove that forces my movement to it's deep rut and makes me sweat. I want a song that gives me goose bumps when I hear it 15 years after I first heard it. I want the un-expected. I want the un-safe. I want chord progressions and time
changes and tempo changes and syncopation.
Why can't Australian music give me that?
Why has the only band in Australia to give me that with their debut album all but disbanded and now the lead singer makes pseudo-intellegent folksy crap with a second rate DJ and roots an ex-soapie pop chick?
Why is the most popular Australian band on the international stage at the moment a group that was formed well before I was born?
Why does all the decent Australian pop come from the UK (Yes, Kylie is highly formed pop music, and worthy of great respect, if not admiration)
What the Sweet F is going on?!?