a step forward . . .
I finally realized that there was a guest book attached to the obituary. So, I wrote.
I think maybe I don't want to be so alone with my grief anymore.
I think I'm going to leave this post public, too. I've spent a long time hiding.
Carl's obituary
To Carl's friends and family,
I offer my most sincere sympathy and condolences for your loss.
I only realized tonight that this guest book existed. I knew of the obituary, but I hadn’t noticed the link. Perhaps I wasn’t ready yet to reach out. Now I am.
I had only known Carl a couple months. But he changed me. And I loved him, but I never got a chance to tell him that, and I don’t know if he knew.
I don’t have any pictures of him. I have two poems that I cherish. I have a handful of memories. I have spent time at his ‘grave’ in Mt. Auburn. I have more pain and grief than I’ve known what to do with for all these months. And I have a hole inside me because there was so much of him I never got to know. I only had a tiny glimpse into one of the most beautiful souls I’ve ever known, but it was enough to change my life.
If there is any way I could ever be able to read more of what he wrote, I would be eternally grateful. If there are any memorial events planned, I would be grateful for an opportunity to attend. (I didn’t find out for a month, so I didn’t know about the memorial in May.)
I wish to express my eternal gratitude to his friend Matthew Alford. Your willingness to respond to my note, and to meet with me, although it was painful, helped me more than I could ever explain. Thank you.
I try to carry a bit of Carl’s light, his caring and compassion and love, with me through my life. It comforts me to know that there are others who knew and loved him and do the same.
Please feel free to contact me via e-mail.
Thank you for this opportunity to share, and than you for sharing.
Sincerely,
Renee
I think maybe I don't want to be so alone with my grief anymore.
I think I'm going to leave this post public, too. I've spent a long time hiding.
Carl's obituary
To Carl's friends and family,
I offer my most sincere sympathy and condolences for your loss.
I only realized tonight that this guest book existed. I knew of the obituary, but I hadn’t noticed the link. Perhaps I wasn’t ready yet to reach out. Now I am.
I had only known Carl a couple months. But he changed me. And I loved him, but I never got a chance to tell him that, and I don’t know if he knew.
I don’t have any pictures of him. I have two poems that I cherish. I have a handful of memories. I have spent time at his ‘grave’ in Mt. Auburn. I have more pain and grief than I’ve known what to do with for all these months. And I have a hole inside me because there was so much of him I never got to know. I only had a tiny glimpse into one of the most beautiful souls I’ve ever known, but it was enough to change my life.
If there is any way I could ever be able to read more of what he wrote, I would be eternally grateful. If there are any memorial events planned, I would be grateful for an opportunity to attend. (I didn’t find out for a month, so I didn’t know about the memorial in May.)
I wish to express my eternal gratitude to his friend Matthew Alford. Your willingness to respond to my note, and to meet with me, although it was painful, helped me more than I could ever explain. Thank you.
I try to carry a bit of Carl’s light, his caring and compassion and love, with me through my life. It comforts me to know that there are others who knew and loved him and do the same.
Please feel free to contact me via e-mail.
Thank you for this opportunity to share, and than you for sharing.
Sincerely,
Renee