(no subject)
It's long, but I could REALLY use some advice...I feel so completely stupid right now. I have a great relationship with the most amazing guy I've ever met, i'm 18 weeks pregnant with our child and he treats me like a princess but things still aren't just right. His best friend just happens to be my sister in law and she's the one who introduced us. I know that he was interested in her when he first met her until he found out that she was engaged to my brother, then he backed off. He has never given me any reason not to trust him, and it's not even that I think they'll do something but for some reason I am just horribly jealous of her. Whenever he gets a text from her it's like my entire insides just sink and him spending time with her makes me feel sick. It doesn't help that I found out that she was talking badly about me to one of our mutual friends behind my back for about a month, makes it hard to trust her. I decided to be honest and I explained to him how I felt and how I could never ask him to give up one of his friends but I really needed help to be okay with it and we talked about it but he didn't do anything really but make me feel bad because I wasn't trusting him, though I know that wasn't what he meant to do. At my birthday party he wanted to go pick up some beer [i'm not 21 yet] so he asked if she could run him down the street to the apartment to grab his ID and then to the market to get beer, he asked me in front of a group of people including her so I felt trapped and let him go. Both the apartment and market are withing 5 minuted of my parents and nearly an hour later he was just getting back. I find out they were in the apartment for a little then they went to her apartment. I found out from our friend they were both inside and a quote from my sister in law to our friend " he was standing in the doorway just expecting me to change in front of him" Later I snapped and told him I couldn't handle it and my party came up he said SHE ran inside, excluding himself, I called him out on knowing he was inside and then he admitted it but it still hurt. He also was with my brother once and I said to tell them both hello and again only after mentioning her presence did he admit she was there. No matter how many times we talk about it I just end up feeling worse. After the incident at my party she left with my best friend and again was gone forever. Now they're talking all the time and I guess she bitches to her about me as well. I've been miserable for weeks now [no thanks to my pregnancy hormones] and now I feel like i'm losing the two people I have in my life and I don't know what to do, but everyone is just making me feel guilty for how I feel, if i'm with him i'm miserable because I have to deal with her but I can't imagine my life without him...I just really don't even know what to do anymore...:/ I wish he would understand what i'm going through...