(no subject)
I wish i didnt think about you so much.
were on such little speaking terms these day that it dosent make much sense for me to incorporate you into my daily life as much as i do.
I knew getting involved with anyone the way i did with you - although little facetime, it just felt like a much deeper relationship with the closeness i had with you - would put me at a setback when i got home.
But somehow - the way you would assure me that i would get over you much more quickly once i got home somehow put me at ease.
I hoped when i got back here you would kind of dissapper in my schedual, kind of just get pushed back in thought and soon enough you would just be "the summer boy"
I miss being able to tell you everything and you somehow understand.
being back here has been so weird with everything.
It sounds so dramatic but i just dont know if my life is going anywhere being here and going to this crappy commuinity college. I dont know if its me worrying about my life to much - or if i've just fucked up here way to much to rectify the situation.
I can never go home - so i feel like everything is riding on how and if i can get things together.
I'm not even doing that much and im just constantly exausted with school and money.
I know i have to get a job but im already running around so much to get to school and back that i cant imagine going on those missions to get to work as well.
somehow i feel like if i were able to talk to you again and just get all this out of my system - you could somehow make me feel much more positive.
i miss you.
talking to you the otherday made me so nervous and set the tone for an awkward conversation.
Make it the way it used to be when we would talk.
please.
-Ali
I wanna hang onto something
That won't break away or fall apart
Like the pieces of my heart.
And dreams came around you in a hazy rain
You opened your mouth wide to feel them fall
And I write a letter, from a one-way train
But i don't think you'll read it at all
were on such little speaking terms these day that it dosent make much sense for me to incorporate you into my daily life as much as i do.
I knew getting involved with anyone the way i did with you - although little facetime, it just felt like a much deeper relationship with the closeness i had with you - would put me at a setback when i got home.
But somehow - the way you would assure me that i would get over you much more quickly once i got home somehow put me at ease.
I hoped when i got back here you would kind of dissapper in my schedual, kind of just get pushed back in thought and soon enough you would just be "the summer boy"
I miss being able to tell you everything and you somehow understand.
being back here has been so weird with everything.
It sounds so dramatic but i just dont know if my life is going anywhere being here and going to this crappy commuinity college. I dont know if its me worrying about my life to much - or if i've just fucked up here way to much to rectify the situation.
I can never go home - so i feel like everything is riding on how and if i can get things together.
I'm not even doing that much and im just constantly exausted with school and money.
I know i have to get a job but im already running around so much to get to school and back that i cant imagine going on those missions to get to work as well.
somehow i feel like if i were able to talk to you again and just get all this out of my system - you could somehow make me feel much more positive.
i miss you.
talking to you the otherday made me so nervous and set the tone for an awkward conversation.
Make it the way it used to be when we would talk.
please.
-Ali
I wanna hang onto something
That won't break away or fall apart
Like the pieces of my heart.
And dreams came around you in a hazy rain
You opened your mouth wide to feel them fall
And I write a letter, from a one-way train
But i don't think you'll read it at all