(Untitled)

[dr_stranger]

I think I know a way.

John will not have to be killed, or replaced, or physically harmed. The city will not have to be evacuated. Hopefully.

I may even have found a way to take some of the machines' functions out of John's control. They would still depend on his power, of course. He'll still need to be replaced eventually

Comments

[sarah_branigan]

I'm glad you've found a potential solution. My offer for help still stands. I'm not sure what I could do though. Don't feel bad about referring to John as a battery. He hasn't taken proper resonsibility for the city and he hurt Daniel and if I had the chance I'd make him sorry.

By the way, Daniel told me the truth about my memories. So don't feel like you need to censor yourself around me, in that respect. I was upset with him but we worked it out. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with myself now, but I'm not about to jump off a bridge or anything.

[dr_stranger]

I don't blame you for being so upset with my version of John. He has caused a lot of trouble, both in the City and in the Nexus. But that doesn't mean I shouldn't at least try to fix him.

Actually, I wasn't quite sure how much he'd told you. So it's good to hear that you know that now, and that you're taking it fairly well.

Although-- are you sure you're all right? Or would you rather not talk to me about this?

[sarah_branigan]

Why wouldn't I want to talk to you about -- Oh. No, it's all right. I don't blame you. Him. You and him. (this alternate business is difficult to get used to).

I am not all right. But I am coping. It comes in waves. Do you have any suggestions? Professionally speaking.

I enjoy conversing with you using this medium, Dr. Schreber. It might be more difficult in person, but I appreciate you listening to me. Please come visit again, when you have a chance.

[dr_stranger]

You will get used to it, after a while. It's very difficult to be in the Nexus for any length of time without getting used to it. I also know a man who looks like us but isn't even a doctor-- he's a professional soldier, I believe. A man mistook me for his friend's ghost, once, and there is also someone who looks like us but is-- not human. These things are unsettling, but inevitable.

The best I can tell you, I think, is that it will function like grief, or like any other trauma. It will come in waves, as you put it, but eventually they grow less and less frequent. I only wish I knew a way to make the truth easier.

It is good to communicate with you this way as well. I'm glad I can be of some help.

[dr_schreber]

You're always welcome to use my room in the labs, but I haven't checked so I don't know if it's still flooded. Some of the equipment may need replacing, and some I brought here. Why don't you make a list of what you'll need, and I can meet you there. We'll find a way to get you the right equipment even if we have to borrow it from someone. People in the labs are helpful.

It's an unpleasant way to think of him, and it's unfair to him. It's also necessary, and I understand. I'll help how I can. You're not going to do this alone.

[dr_stranger]

Thank you very much.

I won't need too much, I think, but I will need a computer that-- if all goes well-- will not be returned. And whatever equipment you might have for working with samples of memories.

[dr_schreber]

I'd like to keep the one I had in the labs, if it's still functional in the first place, but I'm sure we can find you another one. Are you looking for one that can contact the Nexus from the city? It's harder to find, but it can be done, you just need to specify that.

I have... yes, I have all the required equipment for that. Maybe I could meet you in the labs tonight?

[dr_stranger]

I don't want it to contact the Nexus. What I want is a way to connect it to the machines in the City somehow, and we can be fairly sure there aren't any preset for the purpose. It's such a small chance, really . . .

Do you have any spare samples I can work with? Or will I have to wait to get material from John?

I will be there.

[loyal_shesta]

There is a rapid succession of knocks on Schreber's door.

One. Two two two.

And then there's a third knock, which is considerably louder, and perhaps even panicked.

[dr_stranger]

Schreber's half-curled on the bed, sort-of but not really dozing, glasses folded on the blanket next to him. He knows he needs his strength, and it's not going to help anything that he's barely slept in over a week, but

(I can't deal with this)

he can't stop the nightmares whenever he does sleep.

It also doesn't help, knowing that Miss Branigan will be coming along. Extra variables are never good.

The papers are still scattered all over the room, more scribbled-on then ever, and now joined by a lot of newer, hastily-drawn diagrams. Many of these papers have little spirals doodled in the margins.

When he hears the knocks, he thinks, incoherently, Not again. And then: If this is her, I'll--

But there's no reason for it to be.

He takes a deep breath. "Who's there?" he calls, and his voice is rough from fatigue and disuse.

[loyal_shesta]

"Thank God. You're still here." Shesta presses both of his hands against the door. "Can I come in?"

[dr_stranger]

"Shesta?" Schreber jerks upright. "Yes, come in. Please."

He starts feeling around for his glasses. His hand knocks into something, and he hears them rattle to the floor-- but no sound of glass shattering, thank goodness.

Schreber groans and gives up on the glasses, for now. He can see well enough, for conversational purposes, at least.