[Fanfiction] Thaw - Bethany, Velanna
Title: Thaw
Characters: Warden!Bethany, Velanna
Rating/Warnings: G, none
Word Count: 1,805
Summary: Severing familial attachments is easier said than done, no matter what species you are.
Things weren't getting much easier.
The floor gave a squawk as Bethany stepped on a loose board, and she let out a muffled hiss. Vigil's Keep was the largest, noisiest structure she had ever set foot in. Even after several months with the Ferelden Wardens, she had yet to discover all of the creaky spots-or how to get a decent night's sleep with the wind howling and the chill seeping through the ancient walls, or how to make her way from one end of the Keep to the other without getting hopelessly lost, let alone how to fit in with the other Wardens or find her place in their ranks...
She bit her lip, forcing the tide of negativity away before it could overwhelm her-again-like a swollen river bursting from its dam.
At least you're alive, she thought dully. Not rotting in some shallow pit in the Deep Roads, with darkspawn stomping all over your grave-
No. Right now I would rather be with Father and Carver than be here.
The second thought sprang to her mind almost before the first had finished, but she made no attempt to stop it or convince herself it was false. Her family had been her everything as she'd grown up. Now half of them were dead, and being a Warden made it almost certain that she would never see the other half again.
Maybe I don't want to see Marian again.
The sudden, almost savage bitterness made her step falter, and the floor creaked underfoot again, as though to taunt her. She drew a deep breath, forcing her face into a neutral expression as another Warden crossed the hallway opposite her.
The looming walls seemed to press down on her like a slowly closing fist, and for a single absurd moment she was reminded of the Deep Roads' constricting tunnels and creeping darkness. The sour stench of darkspawn clogged her throat, and she could almost hear Anders and Marian's worried voices murmuring just out of earshot.
Her pace quickened. One hallway stretched into another, her fingers fumbling at doorknobs until she found herself outdoors, with the sky stretching overheard and her feet sinking into soft mud. The sun was just beginning to descend behind the trees at the edge of the compound, painting the leaves in shades of orange and gold.
Bethany glanced around the courtyard. Wardens, servants, and merchants bustled back and forth, hurrying to complete one errand or another before the sunlight disappeared. None of them paid her any mind, and the knot in her chest gradually eased.
Her steps were slower, and mercifully quieter as she turned toward the path leading into the woods. The voices in the courtyard faded into the background, replaced by rustling leaves and the chirps of crickets too impatient to wait for nightfall. The temperature was cooler under the trees' cover, the difference subtle but noticeable enough to raise goosebumps beneath the sleeves of her robes.
She let her mind wander as she followed the trail winding through the trees. It would be late afternoon back in Kirkwall, the Hightown streets filled with the usual tangle of guards, snooty merchants, and highborn lords and ladies in their custom-tailored apparel. In the mansion that she'd never had the chance to call home, Bodahn would be bustling about looking after Sandal, Marian's dog would be lounging in front of the fire, and Mother would be freshening up for supper. Marian...
Bethany's lips twisted.
Marian would be gallivanting around town, shanking bandits, sending flirtatiously furtive glances at Anders beneath her lashes, trading snappy quips with Varric, and generally possessing not a care in the world-
An ominous rumble underfoot stopped the thought in its tracks, and Bethany brought herself up short, arms shooting out to maintain her balance. She took two quick steps backward, eyes darting back and forth across the path, one hand straying toward the staff strapped across her back.
Without further warning, the ground heaved like the storm-tossed ships in Isabela's stories, and Bethany had just enough time to glimpse a gnarled wall of roots burst from the earth before she was thrown off her feet. She swallowed a yelp as she landed in a graceless heap several feet away, rolling onto her shoulder and springing up into a defensive stance, her heart pounding and her staff in hand.
The elf standing several feet in front of her barely even spared her a glance.
"What are you staring at?" she snapped, and narrowed her eyes at Bethany's staff. "Put that away."
"I-oh." Bethany straightened, forcing herself to relax, and let the tip of her staff rest on the ground. "I'm sorry, I thought-well, I didn't have time to think, I suppose. I've never seen..." She made a vague gesture, a self-conscious flush crawling up her neck. "Any magic quite like that before."
Velanna merely grunted, reaching up to push stray blond hairs out of her face, and Bethany resisted the urge to begin backing away. The elf was a head shorter than her and stood a decent chance of blowing away in a stiff breeze, but her demeanor-and her temper-could rival a High Dragon.
Or so Bethany had heard. The Wardens, she had quickly discovered, were as prone to gossip as any group of wildly different people living in close quarters with each other. Velanna's sharp opinions, sharper tongue, and tendency to keep to herself made her a frequent subject of the unsavory whispers that drifted through the Keep's drafty halls.
"Human."
Bethany's head jerked up to meet Velanna's stare. "I'm sorry, what? I didn't hear you."
"I asked what you were doing out here." The elf waved her hand in an agitated gesture. "Wandering through the woods instead of-of mingling in the Keep with all the other humans."
"I suppose I'm not much for mingling." Bethany offered a small smile. "I just needed to get out for a little while and clear my head." Her smile turned wry. "Actually, I was hoping a change of scenery would help me stop thinking about my sister, but that didn't work so well."
Velanna went strangely still, her restless hands stiffening at her sides. "Your sister?"
Bethany swallowed, unease stealing over her at the sudden change in Velanna's body language. "Yes," she said slowly. "She...well, it's complicated-and probably a little silly-but..."
She trailed off, uncomfortable heat prickling at her chest like a host of biting insects. Just saying the thoughts out loud made it clear how perfectly irrational they were, and why in the Maker's name had she thought it a good idea to blurt out her family problems in front of Velanna of all people, the most notoriously venomous and dismissive Warden in the whole Keep-
"But what?"
The elf's voice was tinged with impatience, but her eyes held an odd, keen intensity that pierced even through the gathering dusk.
Bethany took a deep breath.
"It wasn't my choice to become a Warden," she said, her voice quiet. "My sister and I were on an expedition in the Deep Roads. She walked out unscathed and I didn't." She gave a wavering sigh. "And now I can't stop thinking of her going on living her life like nothing happened, while I waste away here with the taint in my blood and nothing to look forward to but darkspawn and death. Sometimes I think it would have been better if she had just let me die then and there."
Velanna made a noise somewhere between a snort and a growl. "You say that as though dying from the taint is quick and easy. Perhaps you would have been one of the unlucky ones who linger until it poisons your mind, robs you of your wits and turns you into nothing but a shell of who you used to be."
She turned away sharply, her fists clenched by her sides, and Bethany could see her jaw muscles working. The crickets' chorus rushed to fill the abrupt silence, the noise sudden and loud in her ears.
"You come here to escape your sister," Velanna finally said. Her voice was soft, almost weary. "I come here to talk to mine."
Bethany blinked, her mind casting around for a response that wouldn't result in a fireball to the face. "I beg your pardon?"
The elf gave her a long, measured look, then turned away with a grudging sigh. "Come on."
She strode off, her pace brisk, and Bethany followed hesitantly, trailing several feet behind until they reached a small glade that branched off from the main path. Velanna's steps slowed as she approached a slender sapling, carefully tended but frail, dwarfed by the sturdier trees surrounding it. Its leaves trembled at her approach, and she rested one hand gently on its trunk, as though she feared it might break under her touch.
"Among my people," she said, "we bury our dead and plant trees over their graves."
Her eyes remained fixed on the sapling as she spoke, her fingers moving to pluck away a withered leaf. Bethany drew a quick breath.
"I'm sorry," she murmured. "Your sister, she...died of the taint?"
"So they tell me." Velanna's voice was flat.
"They?"
"The Wardens." Velanna turned away from the tree, bark scraping against her fingers as her hand fell from the trunk. "I've searched for her more times than I can count, but never found any trace of her, alive or dead. They tell me she must be dead. No one can survive the taint for this long. Even the ghouls die eventually."
She sighed, and her shoulders slumped forward. "So I planted the tree. It would give me 'closure,' they said."
"You don't believe them?" Bethany asked softly. "About the taint?"
Velanna bared her teeth, glaring off into the distance. "The only reason I became a Warden was to find her. Every time I enter the Deep Roads, I think 'maybe this time.'"
Her eyes snapped to Bethany's, her expression a mixture of pain and defiance. "Think what you must about your sister," she said. "But at least she knows where you are. In her place, I would have done the exact same thing she did. I wish I'd been given such an opportunity."
Her shoulders straightened again, her scowl back in place as she turned toward the path. Bethany lingered, worrying her lower lip between her teeth.
"Velanna?"
The elf stopped, glared over her shoulder. "What?"
"Your sister..." Bethany wet her lips. "What's her name?"
For just a moment, Velanna's eyes softened. "Seranni."
She raised both arms, curling her fingers into fists. Roots sprung up from the ground, enveloping her, and in the blink of an eye she was gone.
Bethany stayed in the glade, her eyes thoughtful, watching as the fading sunlight flickered on Seranni's tree.
Characters: Warden!Bethany, Velanna
Rating/Warnings: G, none
Word Count: 1,805
Summary: Severing familial attachments is easier said than done, no matter what species you are.
Things weren't getting much easier.
The floor gave a squawk as Bethany stepped on a loose board, and she let out a muffled hiss. Vigil's Keep was the largest, noisiest structure she had ever set foot in. Even after several months with the Ferelden Wardens, she had yet to discover all of the creaky spots-or how to get a decent night's sleep with the wind howling and the chill seeping through the ancient walls, or how to make her way from one end of the Keep to the other without getting hopelessly lost, let alone how to fit in with the other Wardens or find her place in their ranks...
She bit her lip, forcing the tide of negativity away before it could overwhelm her-again-like a swollen river bursting from its dam.
At least you're alive, she thought dully. Not rotting in some shallow pit in the Deep Roads, with darkspawn stomping all over your grave-
No. Right now I would rather be with Father and Carver than be here.
The second thought sprang to her mind almost before the first had finished, but she made no attempt to stop it or convince herself it was false. Her family had been her everything as she'd grown up. Now half of them were dead, and being a Warden made it almost certain that she would never see the other half again.
Maybe I don't want to see Marian again.
The sudden, almost savage bitterness made her step falter, and the floor creaked underfoot again, as though to taunt her. She drew a deep breath, forcing her face into a neutral expression as another Warden crossed the hallway opposite her.
The looming walls seemed to press down on her like a slowly closing fist, and for a single absurd moment she was reminded of the Deep Roads' constricting tunnels and creeping darkness. The sour stench of darkspawn clogged her throat, and she could almost hear Anders and Marian's worried voices murmuring just out of earshot.
Her pace quickened. One hallway stretched into another, her fingers fumbling at doorknobs until she found herself outdoors, with the sky stretching overheard and her feet sinking into soft mud. The sun was just beginning to descend behind the trees at the edge of the compound, painting the leaves in shades of orange and gold.
Bethany glanced around the courtyard. Wardens, servants, and merchants bustled back and forth, hurrying to complete one errand or another before the sunlight disappeared. None of them paid her any mind, and the knot in her chest gradually eased.
Her steps were slower, and mercifully quieter as she turned toward the path leading into the woods. The voices in the courtyard faded into the background, replaced by rustling leaves and the chirps of crickets too impatient to wait for nightfall. The temperature was cooler under the trees' cover, the difference subtle but noticeable enough to raise goosebumps beneath the sleeves of her robes.
She let her mind wander as she followed the trail winding through the trees. It would be late afternoon back in Kirkwall, the Hightown streets filled with the usual tangle of guards, snooty merchants, and highborn lords and ladies in their custom-tailored apparel. In the mansion that she'd never had the chance to call home, Bodahn would be bustling about looking after Sandal, Marian's dog would be lounging in front of the fire, and Mother would be freshening up for supper. Marian...
Bethany's lips twisted.
Marian would be gallivanting around town, shanking bandits, sending flirtatiously furtive glances at Anders beneath her lashes, trading snappy quips with Varric, and generally possessing not a care in the world-
An ominous rumble underfoot stopped the thought in its tracks, and Bethany brought herself up short, arms shooting out to maintain her balance. She took two quick steps backward, eyes darting back and forth across the path, one hand straying toward the staff strapped across her back.
Without further warning, the ground heaved like the storm-tossed ships in Isabela's stories, and Bethany had just enough time to glimpse a gnarled wall of roots burst from the earth before she was thrown off her feet. She swallowed a yelp as she landed in a graceless heap several feet away, rolling onto her shoulder and springing up into a defensive stance, her heart pounding and her staff in hand.
The elf standing several feet in front of her barely even spared her a glance.
"What are you staring at?" she snapped, and narrowed her eyes at Bethany's staff. "Put that away."
"I-oh." Bethany straightened, forcing herself to relax, and let the tip of her staff rest on the ground. "I'm sorry, I thought-well, I didn't have time to think, I suppose. I've never seen..." She made a vague gesture, a self-conscious flush crawling up her neck. "Any magic quite like that before."
Velanna merely grunted, reaching up to push stray blond hairs out of her face, and Bethany resisted the urge to begin backing away. The elf was a head shorter than her and stood a decent chance of blowing away in a stiff breeze, but her demeanor-and her temper-could rival a High Dragon.
Or so Bethany had heard. The Wardens, she had quickly discovered, were as prone to gossip as any group of wildly different people living in close quarters with each other. Velanna's sharp opinions, sharper tongue, and tendency to keep to herself made her a frequent subject of the unsavory whispers that drifted through the Keep's drafty halls.
"Human."
Bethany's head jerked up to meet Velanna's stare. "I'm sorry, what? I didn't hear you."
"I asked what you were doing out here." The elf waved her hand in an agitated gesture. "Wandering through the woods instead of-of mingling in the Keep with all the other humans."
"I suppose I'm not much for mingling." Bethany offered a small smile. "I just needed to get out for a little while and clear my head." Her smile turned wry. "Actually, I was hoping a change of scenery would help me stop thinking about my sister, but that didn't work so well."
Velanna went strangely still, her restless hands stiffening at her sides. "Your sister?"
Bethany swallowed, unease stealing over her at the sudden change in Velanna's body language. "Yes," she said slowly. "She...well, it's complicated-and probably a little silly-but..."
She trailed off, uncomfortable heat prickling at her chest like a host of biting insects. Just saying the thoughts out loud made it clear how perfectly irrational they were, and why in the Maker's name had she thought it a good idea to blurt out her family problems in front of Velanna of all people, the most notoriously venomous and dismissive Warden in the whole Keep-
"But what?"
The elf's voice was tinged with impatience, but her eyes held an odd, keen intensity that pierced even through the gathering dusk.
Bethany took a deep breath.
"It wasn't my choice to become a Warden," she said, her voice quiet. "My sister and I were on an expedition in the Deep Roads. She walked out unscathed and I didn't." She gave a wavering sigh. "And now I can't stop thinking of her going on living her life like nothing happened, while I waste away here with the taint in my blood and nothing to look forward to but darkspawn and death. Sometimes I think it would have been better if she had just let me die then and there."
Velanna made a noise somewhere between a snort and a growl. "You say that as though dying from the taint is quick and easy. Perhaps you would have been one of the unlucky ones who linger until it poisons your mind, robs you of your wits and turns you into nothing but a shell of who you used to be."
She turned away sharply, her fists clenched by her sides, and Bethany could see her jaw muscles working. The crickets' chorus rushed to fill the abrupt silence, the noise sudden and loud in her ears.
"You come here to escape your sister," Velanna finally said. Her voice was soft, almost weary. "I come here to talk to mine."
Bethany blinked, her mind casting around for a response that wouldn't result in a fireball to the face. "I beg your pardon?"
The elf gave her a long, measured look, then turned away with a grudging sigh. "Come on."
She strode off, her pace brisk, and Bethany followed hesitantly, trailing several feet behind until they reached a small glade that branched off from the main path. Velanna's steps slowed as she approached a slender sapling, carefully tended but frail, dwarfed by the sturdier trees surrounding it. Its leaves trembled at her approach, and she rested one hand gently on its trunk, as though she feared it might break under her touch.
"Among my people," she said, "we bury our dead and plant trees over their graves."
Her eyes remained fixed on the sapling as she spoke, her fingers moving to pluck away a withered leaf. Bethany drew a quick breath.
"I'm sorry," she murmured. "Your sister, she...died of the taint?"
"So they tell me." Velanna's voice was flat.
"They?"
"The Wardens." Velanna turned away from the tree, bark scraping against her fingers as her hand fell from the trunk. "I've searched for her more times than I can count, but never found any trace of her, alive or dead. They tell me she must be dead. No one can survive the taint for this long. Even the ghouls die eventually."
She sighed, and her shoulders slumped forward. "So I planted the tree. It would give me 'closure,' they said."
"You don't believe them?" Bethany asked softly. "About the taint?"
Velanna bared her teeth, glaring off into the distance. "The only reason I became a Warden was to find her. Every time I enter the Deep Roads, I think 'maybe this time.'"
Her eyes snapped to Bethany's, her expression a mixture of pain and defiance. "Think what you must about your sister," she said. "But at least she knows where you are. In her place, I would have done the exact same thing she did. I wish I'd been given such an opportunity."
Her shoulders straightened again, her scowl back in place as she turned toward the path. Bethany lingered, worrying her lower lip between her teeth.
"Velanna?"
The elf stopped, glared over her shoulder. "What?"
"Your sister..." Bethany wet her lips. "What's her name?"
For just a moment, Velanna's eyes softened. "Seranni."
She raised both arms, curling her fingers into fists. Roots sprung up from the ground, enveloping her, and in the blink of an eye she was gone.
Bethany stayed in the glade, her eyes thoughtful, watching as the fading sunlight flickered on Seranni's tree.