(Untitled)

[dragonladyflame]

A recent conversation I had with a friend left me feeling guilty. It went like this

Comments

[dvitol]

Oh, and I'd highly recommend against going the humor route, unless this is a person who deals with everything via humor. To most it will seem condescending and trivializing. Chances are this person really does know they have a problem.

[diablerist]

That is a good point. I just happen to be one of those kind of people.

[balthial]

I think its fine to call people out. It will be annoying for them, but still, its an important part of having a community and being friends.

[dragonladyflame]

Can't it also be one of the most potentially dangerous and damaging aspects of community, though? That is, social pressure against an individual's own choices?

Morpheus

[anonymous]

I'm a big fan of assigning responsibility, and I think it's important to respect other people's actions and decisions, never assuming that anything that they do is out of weakness. I wouldn't get offended if someone came up and told me that I do a lot of something, if I do, so long as their tone was such that they respected my decision. If I go on to say, "Yea, I'm trying to cut back," then I say follow up with support, if you're willing to offer it.

I agree with Lydia in that I feel uncomfortable interfering with other people unless their actions are damaging me. Even if they are damaging me, I usually let it go to see if the situation improves on its own, followed by casually letting the person know that their actions are affecting me in as guilt-free a way as possible, followed by leaving the situation entirely, or sucking it up.

[dragonladyflame]

I sometimes think that I will never be able to explain myself to anyone as well as I can explain myself to you. Remind me to explain this observation to you at some point. Though I think we already sort of take it for granted.