*sigh* ok, you guys... Let's go do this again.
i was working today and I had an epiphany.
I was thinking why I have been doing what I've been doing to people. I have been lying, cheating, and doing as little as i possibly can.
I can't do things like this. I need to get home and try to fix everything. From up here there's little i can do unfortunately to fix all that i have fucked up... all i can do is stop it now. I realise who my friends are now... the people who have been there for me. They are the people who truly matter to me.
To them... i am so incredibly sorry for all the shit i have put you through. I realize I didn't have any idea what's been going on and I've been totally oblivious to the matter entirely.
I do now... i can finally see what's been going on around me... if not fully than at least a little. I can finally see through most of the bullshit that I've been putting up with.
finally I have a chance though... I have to stop all the crap... all the lies... all the bullshit that i've put everyone through. Too much has gone wrong for everyone. My family... My friends... My best friend... who I have destroyed.
...I'm so incredibly sorry... I am going to work it all out... I don't know how yet but I know i will.
Somehow I will do something. I have now the hope that i will be home soon... Be back to who i can be and who I want to be.
so to everyone up here that's making it hard for me... Fuck you.
To those of you who have been helping me... I say thank you so much. You have no idea how much you have helped me.
I'm going to be thinking as hard as i possibly can. i am going to pull through this... i have to. I need to repair what I've destroyed and help who i have hurt.
I was thinking why I have been doing what I've been doing to people. I have been lying, cheating, and doing as little as i possibly can.
I can't do things like this. I need to get home and try to fix everything. From up here there's little i can do unfortunately to fix all that i have fucked up... all i can do is stop it now. I realise who my friends are now... the people who have been there for me. They are the people who truly matter to me.
To them... i am so incredibly sorry for all the shit i have put you through. I realize I didn't have any idea what's been going on and I've been totally oblivious to the matter entirely.
I do now... i can finally see what's been going on around me... if not fully than at least a little. I can finally see through most of the bullshit that I've been putting up with.
finally I have a chance though... I have to stop all the crap... all the lies... all the bullshit that i've put everyone through. Too much has gone wrong for everyone. My family... My friends... My best friend... who I have destroyed.
...I'm so incredibly sorry... I am going to work it all out... I don't know how yet but I know i will.
Somehow I will do something. I have now the hope that i will be home soon... Be back to who i can be and who I want to be.
so to everyone up here that's making it hard for me... Fuck you.
To those of you who have been helping me... I say thank you so much. You have no idea how much you have helped me.
I'm going to be thinking as hard as i possibly can. i am going to pull through this... i have to. I need to repair what I've destroyed and help who i have hurt.