Self-questioning.

[draion]

I'm on a little bit of a posting spree, and this is around finals time. Not exactly a good mix, but whatever. And this is yet another entry I'm keeping public, which rarely happens anymore for the non-Writer's Block entries. When was the last time I even did one of those? I guess it's unimportant

Comments

[tequila]

GIRRRRRRL you know I 100% relate to you on this entire post. Only like always, you are so eloquent and vocalise what I've been feeling so much better than I could

[draion]

TBH, your journals are a lot more structured than mine are, the way I see it. But thank you anyway, I knew you'd be the first to reply to this (maybe because I knew you'd be awake by that timezone, LOL)Shiiiiit, why do we have the same outlook on our ideals? I think we almost have an avoiding complex. Traveling is the number one reason I'm looking forward to working in business. International marketing is what I want to do. I want to go to a different country all the time, even if it's just for a couple of days, and strictly business. If I stay in one place for too long, I start blending in, and having to deal with routine and ordinary troubles. That seems scary to actually have to deal with... being a normal, average, everyday person with a normal, average, everyday job and normal, average, everyday worries. Of course, we're all people and we all have to have stress about pretty much the same things in our industrialized countries and our life stages right now, but we only have one life, and I want to have as much of it as

[tequila]

oh my god are you kidding. Everything I write on the internet is like.... nonsensical. I make up words. I use bad grammar and punctuation and run on sentences and when all else fails I'll put a nondescript word like "wah" in. Incomprehensible streams of consciousness ftl. AND LOL U MAKE ME SOUND SO PREDICTABLE HAHAHA i love it

[draion]

Your Personal Planning class is pretty much exactly the same as my Career Planning in high school: just a mandated course meant to show us all how to be professionals, and also to veer us into deciding exactly what we want to be. You and I have made it easier on ourselves by deciding what to do early on, absolutely, but it seems like one rarely truly knows what to do at our age.

Our moms should meet. When you say "'supported' aka pushed me into it," it sounds all too familiar. My mother has always drilled me to get a job at a bank. Who the fuck says I want to get a job at a bank!? I mean, sure, it'd be pretty cash working there (Ugh, Nicole, you bring out the puns in me, I swear), but it seems like we're going ahead with their plans and the plans that everyone else is making for us. The only difference with us is that we do choose it, but it's certainly not completely independent. I guess it's guised as us choosing our future when it's really us choosing our obligations and finding the fun and interest in it, even if we

[katkatrahrahrah]

I completely understand you. I have contemplative moments like this at least once a day. At least you've begun to make a path for yourself, and if the need or passion should ever arise you could change it with ease and keep on walking

[draion]

I totally haven't been commenting on your journal like I thought I would be, but I know that you understand with studies, it's all a bitch. Ffffffffffffffff-

I'm glad you commented here, though, even if we haven't known each other too long or intimately, it's nice to see an awesome person comment here again after a little absence. <3

I get you with that second paragraph. Every day, every single day, I think to myself that in my damp, much-hated school, I could have really excelled if I wanted to. I fantasize about being the valedictorian. Dorian the Valedictorian has a nice ring to it, right? Haha. But, yes, we're still young, and it's almost easy to forget that with how fast the days go by in this country. I really think it's the case of us being born into a generation that really rushes things, most importantly growing up

[everythingonit]

Duct tape those wings with your dreams and fly bb.

[draion]

Hell, my wings will be made out of duct tape, and I'll go farther than anyone else.

You better be doing the same. <3

[sublymonal]

I def had a ton of doubts about my career path.
I was originally going to be an architect.
I even took the two drafting courses in my high school a year ahead of when I was supposed to. I aced physics the whole way through. But when it came to Calculus & Discrete Math, I lost interest. Law came easily for me, this stuff didn't. I didn't want to struggle through school for the rest of my life, so I applied to three universities for law, picked the one I liked best (regardless of what reputation it had or anything like that) and got four amazing years of education out of it.
I'll admit that two and even three years into my university education, I was still having my doubts. Criminal Justice is hard in a lot of ways, and so were the psych courses I was taking, but the fact that I wanted to stay up til 4am and travel an hour to get to school made me realize that I was really passionate about it. And now I wouldn't have it any other way.
Doubt is part of discovery, I guess.

[draion]

This might sound a little sadistic, and it probably is, but it's kind of good to hear that from you, because you definitely seem very dedicated to your career. I'm sure you have your fair share of distractions with your fandom, but you really, really seem focused with becoming a lawyer and doing well on your exams, and I admire that a lot. It comes to no surprise to me that you'd go for being something as difficult as an architect, even if it didn't exactly fall out the way you wanted it to.

Doubt really is a part of discovery. It's one of those sentences that's so easy and truthful, but your own damn mind doesn't come across the fact until someone else says it, haha. Thank you