Caught a bolt of lightning...
You ever drive past the old high school, or the old middle school or the place where you used to have scout meetings? You know that pang you get when your heart wiggles, almost like it's doing a double take? Then you begin to hate the songs that talk about things ending and recalling images of friends and occasions and the auras of those times,
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Usually "Closing Time" gets me through those, especially the "every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." But sometimes it doesn't. And sometimes it just keeps going, and you stop noticing the cold sweats. Sometimes you look at the things crumbling inside you and notice that you're still standing, and you make slight adjustments to your definition of "strength." You take a deep breath, trying not to notice that it sounds more like a gasp, and you say, "On to the next thing!" in as reassuring a voice as you can muster. The more that crumbles, the longer it takes.
A dear friend sent me this, the first time I really caught a bolt of lightning:
If people bring so much courage to this world the world has to kill them to break them, so of course it kills them. The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will ( ... )
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