"Bad Idea" - G - Doyle, Angel
Title: Bad Idea
Author: dreamincolor
Fandom: Ats
Characters: Doyle, Angel, Cordelia
Genre: Humor
Rating: G
Highlight for Warnings/Spoilers: ** Man Smooch! **
Summary: Sometimes, using magic is just a bad idea.
Word Count: 540
Disclaimer: Joss wins.
Beta'd by: wehavedental, but all errors are mine.
A/N: Prompt was 'Magic,' from wehavedental.
Angel hovered over Doyle‘s shoulder, brooding expertly. “This is a very, very bad idea.”
“Common, it’s only temporary.”
“Which means she’s going to kill you when it‘s over.”
The Irishman waved a hand dismissively, “She’ll never even know what hit ‘er.”
“No, she’ll know exactly what hit her. She’s from Sunnydale.”
“..had a lot’a blokes casting spells on her in high school?”
“Only the one.”
“Didn‘t go well then, I take it?”
“Buffy’s mother tried to kill him with an axe.”
Doyle looked up from the open text, eyebrows raised. “..he was trying ta seduce Buffy’s mother?”
“No! It..“ Angel paused, lips moving soundlessly for a moment. “Just, listen to me. I’ve been around for two hundred and forty-seven years, and I’ve never seen a love spell go right.”
“Angel, man, it’s only a kiss.”
“No, it’s a magical kiss. It’s a you’re-jinxing-Cordy-to-kiss-you kiss.”
Out of the corner of his eye Doyle could see his boss fidgeting, picking something up off the desk.
“I’d prefer to think of it as..encouragin’ her ta get a taste ’a what she’s missin‘.“ He flipped several pages ahead, licking his thumb as he went. “The kiss is good enough, n’ she‘ll just think it was my devilish charm that drove ‘er to it, no harm done.” He ran his finger along under the words, squinting in concentration. “Now, I’ve done all the preparations, all I gotta do is make sure she touches that Nigerian sphere, and that I’m the first person she sees-”
“Uhm.“ Angel held up the glass orb he‘d been fingering. “This Nigerian sphere?”
The two men stared at each other for a long moment.
Then Doyle was putting up his hands, and taking a step back. “Angel, just keep yer calm, you don’t want ta - wait! Stop! No! Don-unnf!”
Several muffled protests, a few flimsy smacks to the side of his assaulter’s face, and a sincere attempt at a blind, backwards escape only landed Doyle in the corner of Angel’s office, pinned between the wall and a vampire with twice his strength, who was suddenly kissing him with an unbridled intensity.
Which, actually wasn’t completely horrible, once he stopped flailing.
It wasn’t until Cordelia burst in cheerily through the door, holding their morning coffee, that Angel finally snapped out of it enough for Doyle to shove the other man off him, lips and all.
But it was too late. The brunette stood staring at them, gaping.
“Cordy, it’s not what it looks like, I can explain-”
“No!” Her voice was irregularly high, and she jumped as the mugs of coffee she’d been holding hit the floor, slipping out of her fingers in surprise. “No! No, you two keep on..uh.. I’ll just be in the other..just come out when you’re…sorry about the coffee, I’ll just..right!”
With a slam of the office door, she was gone.
Angel’s eyes had finally started to widen in horror when Doyle rubbed his newly-smooched lips on the back of his coat-sleeve, sighing.
“I hate magic.”