Fall has moved in. If you've ever met me, this is the time of year I start to giggle like a little girl who just wants to play in piles of leaves and take candid pictures because nothing compares to the joy I feel in this season. It's surprising that it's my favorite season, since I think I depend more on the quality of my summers to determine how ( Read more... )

 I'm at home, and I love home. I think this is legitimately the first time since I went to college that I love everything about my home. It's not just a house, it's my home. That's a lovely feeling. I have my boy, I have my best friend, and I get to keep them. They get along, they like each other. It's perfect. Sometimes it feels too good. Maybe I' ( Read more... )

i feel like an era has evolved and subsided and grown again since the last time I wrote in here. It's been almost 7 months. there's no place to start talking about everything that has happened, everything that's changed, everything that hasn't ( Read more... )

Lately when I think, at all, about anything, I feel tired. It's like I feel this tangible weight on my shoulders, that makes me heavy, and leaves me without the energy to do anything about my thoughts. And I just sit there, with this weight, with nowhere to put it, no one who can take it away. So I'm hoping writing will help. Because it's really ( Read more... )

I wish I could explain what's going on with me right now. I think it would be nice to understand this inexplicable loneliness, and constant anxiety. It escalated, it seems, and I have no idea when that happened, or what made it happen. Last night I was in my room, doing my italian exam online, and I finished, and it was before 11. Which for me is ( Read more... )

here's what any legitimate facebook status of mine should say ( Read more... )

but damn sam, i love a woman that rains.

i'm not even sure quite what that means, but i'm pretty sure i'm raining. i can't really explain it except to say that I just feel like a storm, constantly unpredictable and erratic. every step i take is unsteady, every decision is indecisive. School is going alright, in relative terms. I'm not sucking as ( Read more... )

I secretly (not so secretly anymore, I suppose), really want to have my own room so I can just be alone and cry right now, at this very moment, maybe just for this moment. because spontaneously tearing up in the purple onion at a time OTHER than while i'm watching brothers and sisters seems mildly unacceptable. also hugely inexplicable ( Read more... )

I am conflicted. When I think about everything I'm stressed out about - study abroad application, financial aid, working, being behind in schoolwork and most of all worrying about my Grandpa, I know deep down that I shouldn't be happy. I shouldn't even be functioning. It's a lot of weight, there's so much pressure, and I really don't want to lose ( Read more... )

well i haven't seen you in awhile
you know i, i miss our talks, i miss your smile
cuz the look of innocence is pricelss
and baby right now you look so lifeless

and now it hurts me so to have to see you go
watch this song break you down
when there's nothing we can do and no one can get through
remember all the things you tried to forget