Gift-fic for scribe_protra
Title: Catalyst
Word Count: 1,364
Rating: R
Pairing: Usopp/Luffy/Usopp
Disclaimer/Warnings: About the closest I'll ever get to writing porn. *bashes head* Also, this really sucks. Seriously. Majorly bad. Sorry, scribe.
Summary: The science of love strikes back.
“Why?” says Luffy.
“Because,” Usopp explains patiently, despite knowing that Luffy doesn’t really care - he’s just bored, and Sanji only kicked him out of the galley a minute ago, so the captain has to waste an hour before he can try to sneak in again, “the blood from puffer-beetles reacts with the sodium, but only on metal.” He shifts slightly on the floor where he’s crouching over his latest work.
Luffy’s head tilts slowly to one side. Completely. He has a very flexible neck, after all. “And then the metal melts?”
“Yep!” Usopp grins, holding out the new capsule, a bubble of pride swelling up in him. “With the Acid Bomb Mark Four, Sogeking can melt enemy cannons before they even get a shot off! And metal body armour is useless!” He drew himself up, chest swelling. “Yet another brilliant invention by the great Warrior of the Sea, Usopp - why, I based the idea off an old memory of mine, when I fought off an army of robotic tigers-”
“Tigers?” Luffy grins back, and Usopp nods wisely.
“That’s right - robotic tigers. What my enemies, cunning though they were, didn’t realise, was that their amour was useless against the might of my formidable brainpower. With the genius addition of hooper venom as a catalyst-”
“Catamyst?”
Luffy seems to be particularly inquisitive today, but what does the magnificent defender of the weak, Usopp, care? It’s a chance to show off - no explain the breadth and depth of his remarkable mind. “A ‘catalyst’, Luffy. Basically, it’s when two things don’t react in a particular way together - like the beetle blood and the sodium - but then you add something else - the venom - and the reaction happens! Without the venom,” he explained with the knowledge of his awe-inspiring intellect, “the metal won’t melt.”
The captain’s head tilts so far to the side now that it’s almost upside down, and Usopp’s neck twinges in sympathy. “So… when two things don’t react the way you want them to… you add something to it? And then it does?”
“Uh - well, as long as it’s a logical addition. I mean, you can’t just throw any old thing in and call it a catalyst; there’s got to be a certain, uh, science to it.” He tries to think how to explain it to Luffy, who’s not the sharpest sword on the ship. “I mean, you can try adding different things, but the chances of it reacting at all, let alone the way you want it to, are slim. If you have some idea of a pattern that works on similar objects, or you have some idea of the attributes…” Usopp shrugs, a little uncomfortably, because there’s no point in going into a full lecture explaining it - Luffy will just zone out, “Well, basically - for beginners, it’s best to use something that’s been known to work before.”
And then he couldn’t say anything more if he wanted to, because Luffy’s wrapped both his (long, rubbery) arms around his neck, their bodies pressed together, and Luffy’s mouth is on his.
This is slightly odd, the great Usopp thinks vaguely, though he’s more interested in that tongue which is licking enthusiastically at his lips, and trying to burrow between them.
“Erk,” he says, and then the tongue is inside his mouth, wet and tasting of strawberries from the smoothies Sanji made earlier, and it’s thrusting itself around Usopp’s mouth with a lot of eagerness which makes up for the lack of skill, and Usopp’s collapsing back from his crouch, Luffy’s hands cushioning his head before it hits the floor, and he repeats, “Erk!”
Luffy pulls back, grinning, eyes sparkling, and Usopp manages to breathe and -
“Wha’?” he manages to croak, despite his spinning head, oh, oxygen, how he’d missed it.
“We don’t do stuff the way I want us to,” Luffy explains sensibly, as only a D can. “And kissing is what people do before they do the stuff I want us to do. So we’re kissing.”
Usopp takes a second to work this one out. They’ve all become pretty good at following Luffy-logic (which isn’t). “So… the kissing is…?”
“A catamyst!” finishes Luffy, pleased.
Usopp can’t correct him, because the mouth’s back, and the tongue, and he’s not saying ‘erk!’ anymore, he’s already breathing through his nose.
Luffy’s tongue is like his mind - absolutely wild, completely unpredictable, and it has no right or reason to be as good as it is, but damn Uaopp wants more. His tongue tries to control it, tries to slow it down so they both enjoy it, but that doesn’t work (maybe because he’s distracted by the hand groping his ass), and Usopp gives up and goes with it.
Ah. Right. He has hands, doesn’t he?
Usopp reaches up, hesitates at the straw hat, and then gets to work on yanking off Luffy’s top, which the boy is only too happy to help with, even as he starts undressing Usopp. Luffy’s skin is soft beneath his hands, presses down where he pushes it, and springs back right after - it’s rubbery, as obvious as it is to say that, and dry.
He runs one hand over it wonderingly, as the other helps Luffy with his pants, and they’re half-rolling across the floor with satisfying thuds as they struggle to undress themselves and each other without stopping touching one another, and Luffy’s still grinning as he stops kissing and starts sucking on Usopp’s tongue which should not be anywhere as hot as it is but damn, who could expect normal sex with a D -
Luffy’s hand is on him. Luffy’s hand is on him, right there.
And Luffy is sucking and licking and making these hot, laughing noises, and his hand is warm and dry and rubbing right up his cock, and Usopp’s own hands are twitching, spasming, because he knows he should touch Luffy but he can’t think enough to control himself -
There’s husky, tickling breath on his jaw from where Luffy is mouthing at his flesh, licking spirals into the skin and giggling, and the other hand is light on his shoulder, not-quite-pushing Usopp down onto the floor, and Usopp looks up at the boy straddling him, naked except for a straw hat, and the firm grasp on his cock loosens and spreads and twists and
there’s stars
reality stalks grudgingly back. The ceiling above him is familiar, as is the heavy weight of the boy lying on him, despite that they haven’t done this before. Between them is stickiness, both of theirs. Usopp’s head hasn’t quite started working properly yet (his other head has already had enough of a work out) but he looks at the boy who’s still smiling tiredly back at him with wide, dark, trusting eyes, and Usopp thinks: This is Luffy. This is my nakama/captain/guide and that’s all he has time to think because holy crap, is Luffy insatiable?! and those strong hands are moving and spinning and suddenly
Usopp’s on top. He’s the one straddling now, looking down at this idiot little dreamer, the one who loudly proclaims the fact that he’s Going To Be Pirate King when most people regard it as a fool’s goal (and maybe they’re right and Luffy’s just the fool for the job) and Usopp knows as he stares into those eyes that if he’d never known Luffy would be Pirate King (which he did, knew it since Loguetown, maybe before) he’d know it now.
Because the look in those eyes - that’s Luffy. That’s the Pirate King’s intent shining through, gaze fixed on that goal with the certainty and understanding that he will reach it, he will have it, and the Luffy and the Pirate King are one and the same.
Oh, and he’s waving the tube of burn ointment (always a good safety precaution to have nearby, Chopper insists on it) in Usopp’s face and beaming (or is that a leer?) so Usopp stops thinking and starts acting.
You can be a lover or a fighter, but Usopp figures a great warrior of the sea should be good enough to be both.
Word Count: 1,364
Rating: R
Pairing: Usopp/Luffy/Usopp
Disclaimer/Warnings: About the closest I'll ever get to writing porn. *bashes head* Also, this really sucks. Seriously. Majorly bad. Sorry, scribe.
Summary: The science of love strikes back.
“Why?” says Luffy.
“Because,” Usopp explains patiently, despite knowing that Luffy doesn’t really care - he’s just bored, and Sanji only kicked him out of the galley a minute ago, so the captain has to waste an hour before he can try to sneak in again, “the blood from puffer-beetles reacts with the sodium, but only on metal.” He shifts slightly on the floor where he’s crouching over his latest work.
Luffy’s head tilts slowly to one side. Completely. He has a very flexible neck, after all. “And then the metal melts?”
“Yep!” Usopp grins, holding out the new capsule, a bubble of pride swelling up in him. “With the Acid Bomb Mark Four, Sogeking can melt enemy cannons before they even get a shot off! And metal body armour is useless!” He drew himself up, chest swelling. “Yet another brilliant invention by the great Warrior of the Sea, Usopp - why, I based the idea off an old memory of mine, when I fought off an army of robotic tigers-”
“Tigers?” Luffy grins back, and Usopp nods wisely.
“That’s right - robotic tigers. What my enemies, cunning though they were, didn’t realise, was that their amour was useless against the might of my formidable brainpower. With the genius addition of hooper venom as a catalyst-”
“Catamyst?”
Luffy seems to be particularly inquisitive today, but what does the magnificent defender of the weak, Usopp, care? It’s a chance to show off - no explain the breadth and depth of his remarkable mind. “A ‘catalyst’, Luffy. Basically, it’s when two things don’t react in a particular way together - like the beetle blood and the sodium - but then you add something else - the venom - and the reaction happens! Without the venom,” he explained with the knowledge of his awe-inspiring intellect, “the metal won’t melt.”
The captain’s head tilts so far to the side now that it’s almost upside down, and Usopp’s neck twinges in sympathy. “So… when two things don’t react the way you want them to… you add something to it? And then it does?”
“Uh - well, as long as it’s a logical addition. I mean, you can’t just throw any old thing in and call it a catalyst; there’s got to be a certain, uh, science to it.” He tries to think how to explain it to Luffy, who’s not the sharpest sword on the ship. “I mean, you can try adding different things, but the chances of it reacting at all, let alone the way you want it to, are slim. If you have some idea of a pattern that works on similar objects, or you have some idea of the attributes…” Usopp shrugs, a little uncomfortably, because there’s no point in going into a full lecture explaining it - Luffy will just zone out, “Well, basically - for beginners, it’s best to use something that’s been known to work before.”
And then he couldn’t say anything more if he wanted to, because Luffy’s wrapped both his (long, rubbery) arms around his neck, their bodies pressed together, and Luffy’s mouth is on his.
This is slightly odd, the great Usopp thinks vaguely, though he’s more interested in that tongue which is licking enthusiastically at his lips, and trying to burrow between them.
“Erk,” he says, and then the tongue is inside his mouth, wet and tasting of strawberries from the smoothies Sanji made earlier, and it’s thrusting itself around Usopp’s mouth with a lot of eagerness which makes up for the lack of skill, and Usopp’s collapsing back from his crouch, Luffy’s hands cushioning his head before it hits the floor, and he repeats, “Erk!”
Luffy pulls back, grinning, eyes sparkling, and Usopp manages to breathe and -
“Wha’?” he manages to croak, despite his spinning head, oh, oxygen, how he’d missed it.
“We don’t do stuff the way I want us to,” Luffy explains sensibly, as only a D can. “And kissing is what people do before they do the stuff I want us to do. So we’re kissing.”
Usopp takes a second to work this one out. They’ve all become pretty good at following Luffy-logic (which isn’t). “So… the kissing is…?”
“A catamyst!” finishes Luffy, pleased.
Usopp can’t correct him, because the mouth’s back, and the tongue, and he’s not saying ‘erk!’ anymore, he’s already breathing through his nose.
Luffy’s tongue is like his mind - absolutely wild, completely unpredictable, and it has no right or reason to be as good as it is, but damn Uaopp wants more. His tongue tries to control it, tries to slow it down so they both enjoy it, but that doesn’t work (maybe because he’s distracted by the hand groping his ass), and Usopp gives up and goes with it.
Ah. Right. He has hands, doesn’t he?
Usopp reaches up, hesitates at the straw hat, and then gets to work on yanking off Luffy’s top, which the boy is only too happy to help with, even as he starts undressing Usopp. Luffy’s skin is soft beneath his hands, presses down where he pushes it, and springs back right after - it’s rubbery, as obvious as it is to say that, and dry.
He runs one hand over it wonderingly, as the other helps Luffy with his pants, and they’re half-rolling across the floor with satisfying thuds as they struggle to undress themselves and each other without stopping touching one another, and Luffy’s still grinning as he stops kissing and starts sucking on Usopp’s tongue which should not be anywhere as hot as it is but damn, who could expect normal sex with a D -
Luffy’s hand is on him. Luffy’s hand is on him, right there.
And Luffy is sucking and licking and making these hot, laughing noises, and his hand is warm and dry and rubbing right up his cock, and Usopp’s own hands are twitching, spasming, because he knows he should touch Luffy but he can’t think enough to control himself -
There’s husky, tickling breath on his jaw from where Luffy is mouthing at his flesh, licking spirals into the skin and giggling, and the other hand is light on his shoulder, not-quite-pushing Usopp down onto the floor, and Usopp looks up at the boy straddling him, naked except for a straw hat, and the firm grasp on his cock loosens and spreads and twists and
there’s stars
reality stalks grudgingly back. The ceiling above him is familiar, as is the heavy weight of the boy lying on him, despite that they haven’t done this before. Between them is stickiness, both of theirs. Usopp’s head hasn’t quite started working properly yet (his other head has already had enough of a work out) but he looks at the boy who’s still smiling tiredly back at him with wide, dark, trusting eyes, and Usopp thinks: This is Luffy. This is my nakama/captain/guide and that’s all he has time to think because holy crap, is Luffy insatiable?! and those strong hands are moving and spinning and suddenly
Usopp’s on top. He’s the one straddling now, looking down at this idiot little dreamer, the one who loudly proclaims the fact that he’s Going To Be Pirate King when most people regard it as a fool’s goal (and maybe they’re right and Luffy’s just the fool for the job) and Usopp knows as he stares into those eyes that if he’d never known Luffy would be Pirate King (which he did, knew it since Loguetown, maybe before) he’d know it now.
Because the look in those eyes - that’s Luffy. That’s the Pirate King’s intent shining through, gaze fixed on that goal with the certainty and understanding that he will reach it, he will have it, and the Luffy and the Pirate King are one and the same.
Oh, and he’s waving the tube of burn ointment (always a good safety precaution to have nearby, Chopper insists on it) in Usopp’s face and beaming (or is that a leer?) so Usopp stops thinking and starts acting.
You can be a lover or a fighter, but Usopp figures a great warrior of the sea should be good enough to be both.