death

[drlynch]

helgagrace´s mother died on friday afternoon. i don´t know anything else except that helgagrace was in the baltimore airport which, considering she works fridays and saturdays, must mean that she knew it was the end. the other thing i don´t know is if they told helgagrace in the airport or waited until she got home. it seems cruel to tell her

Comments

[beyondbliss]

:( I'm sorry for helgagrace (she's your sister's partner? I met her at one point, if so, and if it's the person I'm thinking of

[drlynch]

ty, i thought of you as i wrote the post at some ungodly hour this morning.

that´s exactly what i had decided--that i couldn´t understand, that none of us can, but we can offer to be there.

[copper_beech]

::hugs to helgagrace and her family::

So sorry to hear about this, and that it happened when helgagrace was so far away from everyone who loves her.

Regret that you are far as well, this must be a difficult time for you not to be close enough to offer more physical comfort/support (hugs are sometimes easier to find than words when loss goes beyond language.)

Caring thoughts to helgagrace, your sister, you and all family members.

[drlynch]

yes, a bit hard, especially since i wasn´t home and had no way of talking to anyone until this morning (they could have called my cell yesterday, but that is for emergencies only because it is so expensive

[copper_beech]

::more hugs::

Regret to hear you also received the news when you were away from your home- how awful to not even be able to reach out to them during such a hard time.

Also that is terrible that helgagrace is having to deal with her other family members being extra evil or non-functional as executor on top of her mother passing away.

If I've learned anything from spending time with beyondbliss in the last year it is how incredibly hard it is to be an executor, so flighty is not a good sign (and how extra frustrating when they have an in-family lawyer who could have at least spoken legalese to the lawyer handling the estate- some other families might have done the reverse and dumped the whole thing on your sister which could have been hard in a different way since if I remember correctly estates are not one of her specialties

[drlynch]

right, but they don't want the family lawyer to have anything to do with it. she wrote the will so that none of the money can go to child support or to pay off creditors. it just so happens that helgagrace´s creditor is ann, who took out an extra student loan this summer so helgagrace could not work and spend the time with her mother.

and yes--telling me things that she didn´t tell her daughters--some minor, but the major ones get me--like she couldn´t admit to the kids what actually happened. potentially, she wrote about it in this "life story" that she wrote for them; otherwise, it is something that she told me so that *someone* would know the truth.

the best thing about being back home is that now i can talk to everyone--mom has skype at work and ann has it at home so i´ll probably talk to ann tonight or tomorrow, depending on when helgagrace comes home from utah.

anyway, we could talk anytime but this shouldn´t necessarily be the motivation.