50 Bulls**t Jobs
This is HILARIOUS! If you're wondering what else you could do with your life, here are a few ways to be profitably and pleasantly (if uselessly) employed, from Stanley Bing's book, 100 Bulls**t Jobs … and How to Get Them.
For example:
Job #41: Political reverend
Turn public issues to personal advantage.
$$: Millions, if you've got a good TV gig ( Read more... )
For example:
Job #41: Political reverend
Turn public issues to personal advantage.
$$: Millions, if you've got a good TV gig ( Read more... )
Comments 7
Quality Analyst
A reader from Maryland writes:
I am a Quality Analyst with a major health insurance agency in the
US. The job consists of looking over submitted information to verify that others are doing their jobs better. It is a mundane job that could drive you crazy. I get to work from home more than half ot the week and my boss actually likes me. When I work home I usually do most of my work the night before and then I can take a break the next day. I have meetings to go to but one day I mentioned to my boss that she should only have them on certain days (my days actually in the office) and she’s never had them any other time since. I have to do a few things that are not in my job description, but of course, the benefits outweigh that. And I’m up for my second raise in 6 mths.
Digital Asset ManagementA reader from New York writes ( ... )
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"You die alone and unmourned."
HA!
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I also like this one...
Backup dancer
Dance behind people's behinds, provide controlled substances, marry pop tarts
$$: Depends on the divorce settlement and the quality of the prenup.
The upside: Proximity to many talented people, one of whom may encounter you in an overheated condition and make a decision she will later regret and you will not.
The downside: Having your Ferrari towed away by your pissed-off ex-wife.
The dark side: Looking at sleeping pop tart without makeup first thing in the morning.
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(The comment has been removed)
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(The comment has been removed)
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Job #43: Quantum physicist/string theorist
Produce theories about the nature of the universe that are not amenable to proof by normal human means.
Very little in modern science is amenable to proofs by "normal" human means. This charge could be laid at the feet of many scientists or even many professions. And string theory itself isn't currently amenable to proof by any human means, normal or egg head. It's currently all math.
The downside: None of what you do helps anybody understand anything.
I mean it does give us faster computers. So it does produce cool products.
The dark side: Tomorrow... next week... perhaps a year or two from now... some sharp kid is going to come along with a theory that takes a wicked detour directly from Einstein, goes completely around quantum theory, and explains the entire universe in simple, elegant terms that do not need a billion-dollar machine to prove. Your entire realm of endeavor will be relegated to a footnote on the twentieth ( ... )
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But it's not funny. :p
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