Growing Pains (7/?)
Title: Growing Pains (7/?)
Author: dtsguru
Fandom: original
Rating: PG-13 (for some vulgar language)
Genre: urban fantasy
Spoiler Warnings: none
Word Count: 1070
This is set in ‘The Family’ ‘verse. Self beta’d so all mistakes most definitely are mine.
Joe glanced up as I made my way back toward my lawn chair. I sent him a smile, wondering if he could see how uncomfortable I felt. Greg had moved in for a kiss there at the end. The move had shocked me. What was he thinking? We hadn’t been on a date, he was leaving a cookout for fuck’s sake. I had darted my head to the side, catching his lips on my cheek. It was still awkward but at least I didn’t have to knee him in the balls for laying one on me.
Of course I could have blasted him. But I knew that he didn’t mean me any harm. He was trying hard to win me over. And I wasn’t making it easy on him. The man was just feeling good from a couple beers and he went with what felt right. Too bad it still didn’t feel right to me.
“You okay?” Joe asked as I settled into my chair.
I accepted the beer he held out toward me. I didn’t stop to question the offer, even though I knew Joe didn’t like it when I drank anything stronger than a wine cooler. And even then he wasn’t exactly thrilled.
I shrugged his question off. “Fine. This was fun tonight.”
He nodded, still watching me. “Yeah.”
Eventually I felt his gaze shift away from me. I allowed myself to relax into the mesh of the lawn chair, closing my eyes. The night was cool, almost too cool to be outside without a jacket. But I didn’t want to go inside yet. Going inside would be admitting that fall had nearly given way to winter.
“Did I hear you agreeing to go on another date with Greg?”
I had let myself sink so deep into the peace of the evening I had started to fall asleep. Joe’s question jerked me awake. Sitting up, I tried to rub warmth into my arms as I considered his question. And the odd tone of voice.
Why did he sound like that? Like the idea of me going on a date with Greg was a bad idea? He was the one who told me to reconcile with the man.
“I told him I’d go to a movie. Didn’t say when. Coffee wasn’t so bad so I figured, why not?”
Joe grunted in response.
“So, how’s April doing?” I tried for a safer topic.
“Kid’s good. Her mom is losing her shit. Won’t be long till she’s on my couch again. Probably full time.”
“What? You think she’s going to run away again? She was doing so well last time I talked to her.” She’d even started studying.
He took a quick swig of his beer before shaking his head. “She’ll get kicked out this time. Her mom is still throwing a shit fit about the whole pregnancy thing.”
“And you’re okay with her staying here this close to the delivery date? Isn’t she pretty close to the end? What about if she pops that kid out while she’s still here?”
Nodding and gesturing with his beer bottle, he spoke. “Been meaning to talk to you about that. Can’t make a pregnant chick, at least one that big, crash on the couch. It’d be a dick move. If she shows up, I’d appreciate it if you’d be willing to give her the room.”
“Of course.”
The night descended into silence again. It wasn’t the comfortable silence I was used to though. Joe was pouting. Angrily. His shoulders were tensed up. For the hundredth time in the last six months I wondered if maybe I had outlived my welcome. I couldn’t stay with Joe forever. I had to start thinking about finding a place of my own. Especially if April did wind up staying with him.
“I’ll start looking for a place tomorrow.”
“If that’s what you want to do,” was his surly response.
I twisted to look at him. “What’s your problem? You wanted me to do this. You told me to give him a chance. You told me to forgive him. I thought you’d be happy.”
He shrugged. “I wanted you to forgive him for your sake. Not his. You couldn’t be happy living with that kinda hurt buried in you. You needed to get over it and move on.”
He frowned out into the night. “Still not happy with the idea that you’re stuck with him.”
I stalled for time by sucking on my beer for awhile. Joe didn’t really expect a response, but he deserved one. If only for the reason that he had been there for me every time I had needed a shoulder over the years. He had listened to me bitch and moan without ever once complaining about it. And he had given me a kick in the ass when I needed one. I could give him the respect of an answer. So, what was I going to say?
“I don’t know what else to do,” I finally admitted. “I’m sick of beating my head against that brick wall. If I’m not with him I don’t have many options, do I?”
His frown deepened. “Once you get this shit, all the bitterness, out of your system? Sure you do. You both move on to different people.”
“And continue hurting each other? You think he deserves to be miserable every time I have a good night with my guy? Or me, I should deal with that? We should continue breaking our vows? Because that’s proven to be such a healthy life choice so far.”
The muscles in his jaw bulged as he started to grind his teeth. “So you’re just going to give up then? Give in?”
Sighing, I looked away. “I don’t know. I drank a fucking cup of coffee with the man, Joe. Why are you giving me such a hard time about this tonight? Do you need a Midol or something?”
“You’re right. You do what you need to do.” His jaw relaxed and he slumped into his chair. “You do whatever you need to do to be happy. I want you to be happy.”
“I’m trying to do that, in the smartest way that I can.”
Joe stood, stretching with a loud groan. Then he turned to me, offering me a hand up. “Come on. I better get you in before that booze hits you and you start streaking or some shit.”
Author: dtsguru
Fandom: original
Rating: PG-13 (for some vulgar language)
Genre: urban fantasy
Spoiler Warnings: none
Word Count: 1070
This is set in ‘The Family’ ‘verse. Self beta’d so all mistakes most definitely are mine.
Joe glanced up as I made my way back toward my lawn chair. I sent him a smile, wondering if he could see how uncomfortable I felt. Greg had moved in for a kiss there at the end. The move had shocked me. What was he thinking? We hadn’t been on a date, he was leaving a cookout for fuck’s sake. I had darted my head to the side, catching his lips on my cheek. It was still awkward but at least I didn’t have to knee him in the balls for laying one on me.
Of course I could have blasted him. But I knew that he didn’t mean me any harm. He was trying hard to win me over. And I wasn’t making it easy on him. The man was just feeling good from a couple beers and he went with what felt right. Too bad it still didn’t feel right to me.
“You okay?” Joe asked as I settled into my chair.
I accepted the beer he held out toward me. I didn’t stop to question the offer, even though I knew Joe didn’t like it when I drank anything stronger than a wine cooler. And even then he wasn’t exactly thrilled.
I shrugged his question off. “Fine. This was fun tonight.”
He nodded, still watching me. “Yeah.”
Eventually I felt his gaze shift away from me. I allowed myself to relax into the mesh of the lawn chair, closing my eyes. The night was cool, almost too cool to be outside without a jacket. But I didn’t want to go inside yet. Going inside would be admitting that fall had nearly given way to winter.
“Did I hear you agreeing to go on another date with Greg?”
I had let myself sink so deep into the peace of the evening I had started to fall asleep. Joe’s question jerked me awake. Sitting up, I tried to rub warmth into my arms as I considered his question. And the odd tone of voice.
Why did he sound like that? Like the idea of me going on a date with Greg was a bad idea? He was the one who told me to reconcile with the man.
“I told him I’d go to a movie. Didn’t say when. Coffee wasn’t so bad so I figured, why not?”
Joe grunted in response.
“So, how’s April doing?” I tried for a safer topic.
“Kid’s good. Her mom is losing her shit. Won’t be long till she’s on my couch again. Probably full time.”
“What? You think she’s going to run away again? She was doing so well last time I talked to her.” She’d even started studying.
He took a quick swig of his beer before shaking his head. “She’ll get kicked out this time. Her mom is still throwing a shit fit about the whole pregnancy thing.”
“And you’re okay with her staying here this close to the delivery date? Isn’t she pretty close to the end? What about if she pops that kid out while she’s still here?”
Nodding and gesturing with his beer bottle, he spoke. “Been meaning to talk to you about that. Can’t make a pregnant chick, at least one that big, crash on the couch. It’d be a dick move. If she shows up, I’d appreciate it if you’d be willing to give her the room.”
“Of course.”
The night descended into silence again. It wasn’t the comfortable silence I was used to though. Joe was pouting. Angrily. His shoulders were tensed up. For the hundredth time in the last six months I wondered if maybe I had outlived my welcome. I couldn’t stay with Joe forever. I had to start thinking about finding a place of my own. Especially if April did wind up staying with him.
“I’ll start looking for a place tomorrow.”
“If that’s what you want to do,” was his surly response.
I twisted to look at him. “What’s your problem? You wanted me to do this. You told me to give him a chance. You told me to forgive him. I thought you’d be happy.”
He shrugged. “I wanted you to forgive him for your sake. Not his. You couldn’t be happy living with that kinda hurt buried in you. You needed to get over it and move on.”
He frowned out into the night. “Still not happy with the idea that you’re stuck with him.”
I stalled for time by sucking on my beer for awhile. Joe didn’t really expect a response, but he deserved one. If only for the reason that he had been there for me every time I had needed a shoulder over the years. He had listened to me bitch and moan without ever once complaining about it. And he had given me a kick in the ass when I needed one. I could give him the respect of an answer. So, what was I going to say?
“I don’t know what else to do,” I finally admitted. “I’m sick of beating my head against that brick wall. If I’m not with him I don’t have many options, do I?”
His frown deepened. “Once you get this shit, all the bitterness, out of your system? Sure you do. You both move on to different people.”
“And continue hurting each other? You think he deserves to be miserable every time I have a good night with my guy? Or me, I should deal with that? We should continue breaking our vows? Because that’s proven to be such a healthy life choice so far.”
The muscles in his jaw bulged as he started to grind his teeth. “So you’re just going to give up then? Give in?”
Sighing, I looked away. “I don’t know. I drank a fucking cup of coffee with the man, Joe. Why are you giving me such a hard time about this tonight? Do you need a Midol or something?”
“You’re right. You do what you need to do.” His jaw relaxed and he slumped into his chair. “You do whatever you need to do to be happy. I want you to be happy.”
“I’m trying to do that, in the smartest way that I can.”
Joe stood, stretching with a loud groan. Then he turned to me, offering me a hand up. “Come on. I better get you in before that booze hits you and you start streaking or some shit.”