Meme
The acquisition and enjoyment of new music was the driving force of my late teens. Trying to explore the landscape of my musical taste has caused me to wonder, am I mapping a taste that is already there, or am I creating it as I go? When coming across new music, I would frequently find that I was drawn to songs that struck some kind of nostalgic resonance within me.
Another driving force, or rather a nagging un-satisfaction, was that the music I was listening to back then wasn't enough. I would listen to Linkin Park and think "yes, there's something there, but it needs more. More something. I would listen to Disturbed and think "yes, there's some more of it here, but it's still not enough." Eventually I found Opeth, after seeing a flyer for a gig in exeter, and checked them out. I downloaded the song "Bleak", and found what I was looking for. And it was called metal. And that was the start.
My family at the time thought my music was crazy, and they still do I suppose. But now and then they would come into my room and say "that bit was really nice". Then the vocals would start and they would recoil in horror.
On faith: I think I stopped believing in god before I stopped believing in Father Christmas, if I ever believed in it at all. I have memories of playing on my mega drive and thinking about god. My reasoning was, that because god was all about old stuff, like churches, and hymns, and putting babies in mangers, then he must really hate new stuff. Like my mega drive, my tv and my digital watch. By using them I must be hated by god. You might think that as a seven-year-old, this might be somewhat concerning, but it wasn't. I wasn't scared at all, I didn't even give it more than a few moments' thought, because I didn't believe in god. Whenever I think about religion, god, or anything associated, there is always this result being returned from the most fundamental level of my beliefs. I cannot believe in god, even for a moment.
And, quite honestly, people who, when asked the question of whether god exists, have the opposite answer echoing up from their very core, scare the shit out of me.
I like trees. They're nice. I like deciduous more than coniferous. I like the sound of gentle wind through the leaves. Coniferous trees are pretty oppressive; they remind me of overcast days walking in the brecon beacons with my family - when I was young this was pretty much the worst thing that could happen to me. Actually I don't like coniferous trees at all.
Another driving force, or rather a nagging un-satisfaction, was that the music I was listening to back then wasn't enough. I would listen to Linkin Park and think "yes, there's something there, but it needs more. More something. I would listen to Disturbed and think "yes, there's some more of it here, but it's still not enough." Eventually I found Opeth, after seeing a flyer for a gig in exeter, and checked them out. I downloaded the song "Bleak", and found what I was looking for. And it was called metal. And that was the start.
My family at the time thought my music was crazy, and they still do I suppose. But now and then they would come into my room and say "that bit was really nice". Then the vocals would start and they would recoil in horror.
On faith: I think I stopped believing in god before I stopped believing in Father Christmas, if I ever believed in it at all. I have memories of playing on my mega drive and thinking about god. My reasoning was, that because god was all about old stuff, like churches, and hymns, and putting babies in mangers, then he must really hate new stuff. Like my mega drive, my tv and my digital watch. By using them I must be hated by god. You might think that as a seven-year-old, this might be somewhat concerning, but it wasn't. I wasn't scared at all, I didn't even give it more than a few moments' thought, because I didn't believe in god. Whenever I think about religion, god, or anything associated, there is always this result being returned from the most fundamental level of my beliefs. I cannot believe in god, even for a moment.
And, quite honestly, people who, when asked the question of whether god exists, have the opposite answer echoing up from their very core, scare the shit out of me.
I like trees. They're nice. I like deciduous more than coniferous. I like the sound of gentle wind through the leaves. Coniferous trees are pretty oppressive; they remind me of overcast days walking in the brecon beacons with my family - when I was young this was pretty much the worst thing that could happen to me. Actually I don't like coniferous trees at all.