Big bang 2013: better together: prologue
Fic title: Better together prologue
Author name: dutch_chick674
Artist name: theextrac00kie
Genre:> RPS au
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 23.331
Warnings: Angst, sex scenes
Summary: Jared finally left Jensen when he was tired of always being the second choice to the other man. He worked thought the hard times on supernatural but was happy when the series finally ended.
Jensen was broken when Jared finally had enough, even though he always knew in the back of his mind that thing would eventually fall apart. He only realized what a fool he was letting Jared go after he had ruined things between them
This is the story of what happens when they meet again four years after supernatural ended.
Authors note 1: This is part of the heartbreak verse, but reading it not requited.
Prologue
“He left Chris, he just left me,” Jensen sobs.
The first thing Jensen did after he checked into the hotel, after Jared had changed the locks on his house, was buy two bottles of scotch and drink one. When he was ready to open the second one he called Chris.
Jensen can’t believe how much it hurt when Jared finally had enough. He can’t believe their last fight was what finally drove Jared away. They had fought about Danneel often but Jared always forgave him.
Except for this time.
“What are you talking about?” Chris asks and sounds confused.
And why wouldn’t he be confused? Jensen had kept Jared a secret from everyone he knew. As far as his friends are concerned Jensen is still happy with Danneel and is planning to marry the girl one day. Hell, even Jensen thought that’s what would happen. But then again, Jensen had thought Jared would always be there for him. As his dirty little secret.
“He’s done with me,” Jensen sighs.
“Who’s done with you? Jensen, are you drunk?” Chris asks.
Jensen blinks as the room spins around him. He has the feeling he’s about two minutes from passing out. He’s looking forward to it; at least then he doesn’t have to face everything that has happened.
“Jared,” he answers Chris’s first question.
“Where are you?” Jensen can hear concern in Chris’s voice this time.
Jensen smiles and is grateful for his friend. He could always count on Chris to be there for him. He tells the other man the name of the hotel and he hangs up the phone. There is no need to talk anymore. He tries to walk to the bed but falls over his own clumsy feet and doesn’t really feel it when he lands on the floor. He passes out before he can figure out how he’s supposed to get up.
***
Jensen wakes up, groggy and nauseated. He gets on his hands and knees before he throws up on the floor. He wonders if he should try and go to the bedroom, but decides it is already too late. After he’s done retching, he slowly gets up, feeling queasy. He stands in the middle of the room for a couple of minutes to make sure that he is alright, before he realized the pounding isn’t just in his head.
“God damn it, Jensen!” Chris’s voice comes from behind the door and he hears some more pounding.
Jensen moves towards the door as fast as he can, which isn’t all that fast, and hopes Chris hasn’t already called hotel security. When Jensen opens the door, Chris almost knocks on his head, but stops just in time.
“What the fuck, Jen?” Chris hisses. “You call me, drunk of your ass, not making any sense, and then hang up only to not answer your phone for the next four hours!”
Jensen cringes at Chris’s tone, knowing his anger only stems from his concern, especially since Jensen rarely gets drunk. Chris pushes past Jensen to go inside but stops the moment he sees the mess in the room.
“What the fuck,” Chris whispers before turning to Jensen. “You’re going to take a shower and then we’re going to talk about what happened.” He pushes Jensen towards the shower.
When Jensen gets out of the shower, Chris has called someone to get rid of the stain in the carpet and to clean the rest of the room.
“Better?” he asks after he hands Jensen a coffee and they both sit down.
Jensen wishes he could say yes, but the shower only made him feel cleaner. So, instead of answering, he makes a face before talking a big gulp of his coffee.
They sit together in silence. Jensen enjoys his coffee for a while before Chris loses his patience.
“You were going to tell me what was wrong,” Chris says, glaring at Jensen.
Jensen sighs. He knows that he had promised, but it’s a hard story to tell, and he isn’t proud of it. Jensen has begun to recognize his own fault. Right now, part of Chris is still feeling sorry for him, but after he tells him what he’s done, Jensen doubts Chris will be very understanding.
But he needs to get this of his chest, so he takes a deep breath before saying, “I’ve been cheating on Danneel.”
“What!?”
Jensen sighs again, and decided that he had the right idea last night: he needs to be drunk for this conversation. Ignoring his headache, he reaches out for the half-filled bottle of scotch that is still standing on the table.
“Oh, no you don’t,” Chris says as he slaps Jensen’s hand away from the bottle.
Jensen groans, miserable.
“No Jen, you’re not going to drink away your problems!” Chris says angrily before regaining his composure. “You cheated on Danneel?”
Jensen nods. “Many times, with Jared.”
Chris sighs. “Okay, you need to elaborate.”
Jensen nods again and tells Chris about the first time he and Jared hooked up, at the end of season two during a cast party. He’d been drunk and he had found himself kissing Jared, before dragging him back to his hotel room. At least that time he’d had the excuse of being drunk. What had started out as a great friendship slowly developed into a painful relationship.
He tells Chris that, despite being happy with Danneel, he always found his way back to Jared’s arms.
“Last week, at the con, he told me he’s had enough. Changed the locks to the house and everything. After a year of being together!”
Chris frowns at him. “After a year of you cheating on Danneel with him,” he states slowly.
Jensen shakes his head, wanting to deny it even if it was the truth. It didn’t matter anymore, it was over now anyway.
“You love him,” Chris says, and Jensen nods. “Then maybe you need to break up with Danneel,” Chris adds.
Jensen knows that; he had already realized it even through his drunken haze. He needs to start over, needs a clean slate. And no matter how much he tells himself he loves Danneel, he recognizes that it just isn’t enough.
Jensen can’t stop the tears from falling, no matter how hard he tries. He feels like a loser for crying on his friend’s shoulder, but it hurts so much.
“It’s okay Jen, you’ll be fine,” Chris says, and keeps repeating it until Jensen almost believes him.
***
“You know it’s not unusual for a woman to cry during sex. Sometimes they experience an orgasm so big they get emotional. Doesn’t mean they’re sad though,” Chad says.
Jared frowns. He doesn’t know why his friend is telling him this, but figures Chad is trying to cheer him up. After leaving the convention, Jared went straight home and called Chad, though he knew the other man was enjoying his vacation. Chad, good friend he is, came right away. He still doesn’t know what is bothering Jared, not yet anyway. And Jared has no idea how (or if) to tell him.
Jared had been stupid to let this thing with Jensen go on for a year. He had been so scared when he made the first move over a year ago, and then elated when Jensen came to him the time after that. He should have known that Jensen would never break up with Danneel. She is so damned perfect that Jared can’t even really hate her. Despite Jensen saying he loved him, Jared should have known that they were never meant to be more than fuck buddies.
“Dude are you even listening to me?” Chad says.
Jared looks up at his friend, and realizes he has drifted off again, thinking about Jensen-the one thing he had hoped Chad would distract him from.
“I’m gay.” It comes out of his mouth before he realizes it.
Chad gives him a sceptical look. “Gay?”
Jared nods. “I-I had this thing with a guy. Jensen. And after that I. . .” he trails off, unable to continue.
“Gay?” Chad asks again.
“Yes.”
Chad shrugs. “Just because of one night with Jensen?”
Jared wants to tell him it was more, that it was a relationship, but he decides it doesn’t matter. It’s all in the past now.
“Yeah, I wanted you to be the first to know, you know, before I told anyone else,” Jared says.
“I think you need to be sure before you tell your parents,” Chad says, then nods. “We should go out, find you a couple of guys to date. Just so you know it wasn’t a fluke. I mean, if you squint, Jensen can look a bit like a girl.”
Jared can’t help but laugh at that. But Chad has a point; Jared needs to see what is out there, and try to get over Jensen.
“Yeah, let’s go out,” he says, and although the smile feels forced now, he knows one day it will be genuine again.
next entry
Author name: dutch_chick674
Artist name: theextrac00kie
Genre:> RPS au
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 23.331
Warnings: Angst, sex scenes
Summary: Jared finally left Jensen when he was tired of always being the second choice to the other man. He worked thought the hard times on supernatural but was happy when the series finally ended.
Jensen was broken when Jared finally had enough, even though he always knew in the back of his mind that thing would eventually fall apart. He only realized what a fool he was letting Jared go after he had ruined things between them
This is the story of what happens when they meet again four years after supernatural ended.
Authors note 1: This is part of the heartbreak verse, but reading it not requited.
Prologue
“He left Chris, he just left me,” Jensen sobs.
The first thing Jensen did after he checked into the hotel, after Jared had changed the locks on his house, was buy two bottles of scotch and drink one. When he was ready to open the second one he called Chris.
Jensen can’t believe how much it hurt when Jared finally had enough. He can’t believe their last fight was what finally drove Jared away. They had fought about Danneel often but Jared always forgave him.
Except for this time.
“What are you talking about?” Chris asks and sounds confused.
And why wouldn’t he be confused? Jensen had kept Jared a secret from everyone he knew. As far as his friends are concerned Jensen is still happy with Danneel and is planning to marry the girl one day. Hell, even Jensen thought that’s what would happen. But then again, Jensen had thought Jared would always be there for him. As his dirty little secret.
“He’s done with me,” Jensen sighs.
“Who’s done with you? Jensen, are you drunk?” Chris asks.
Jensen blinks as the room spins around him. He has the feeling he’s about two minutes from passing out. He’s looking forward to it; at least then he doesn’t have to face everything that has happened.
“Jared,” he answers Chris’s first question.
“Where are you?” Jensen can hear concern in Chris’s voice this time.
Jensen smiles and is grateful for his friend. He could always count on Chris to be there for him. He tells the other man the name of the hotel and he hangs up the phone. There is no need to talk anymore. He tries to walk to the bed but falls over his own clumsy feet and doesn’t really feel it when he lands on the floor. He passes out before he can figure out how he’s supposed to get up.
***
Jensen wakes up, groggy and nauseated. He gets on his hands and knees before he throws up on the floor. He wonders if he should try and go to the bedroom, but decides it is already too late. After he’s done retching, he slowly gets up, feeling queasy. He stands in the middle of the room for a couple of minutes to make sure that he is alright, before he realized the pounding isn’t just in his head.
“God damn it, Jensen!” Chris’s voice comes from behind the door and he hears some more pounding.
Jensen moves towards the door as fast as he can, which isn’t all that fast, and hopes Chris hasn’t already called hotel security. When Jensen opens the door, Chris almost knocks on his head, but stops just in time.
“What the fuck, Jen?” Chris hisses. “You call me, drunk of your ass, not making any sense, and then hang up only to not answer your phone for the next four hours!”
Jensen cringes at Chris’s tone, knowing his anger only stems from his concern, especially since Jensen rarely gets drunk. Chris pushes past Jensen to go inside but stops the moment he sees the mess in the room.
“What the fuck,” Chris whispers before turning to Jensen. “You’re going to take a shower and then we’re going to talk about what happened.” He pushes Jensen towards the shower.
When Jensen gets out of the shower, Chris has called someone to get rid of the stain in the carpet and to clean the rest of the room.
“Better?” he asks after he hands Jensen a coffee and they both sit down.
Jensen wishes he could say yes, but the shower only made him feel cleaner. So, instead of answering, he makes a face before talking a big gulp of his coffee.
They sit together in silence. Jensen enjoys his coffee for a while before Chris loses his patience.
“You were going to tell me what was wrong,” Chris says, glaring at Jensen.
Jensen sighs. He knows that he had promised, but it’s a hard story to tell, and he isn’t proud of it. Jensen has begun to recognize his own fault. Right now, part of Chris is still feeling sorry for him, but after he tells him what he’s done, Jensen doubts Chris will be very understanding.
But he needs to get this of his chest, so he takes a deep breath before saying, “I’ve been cheating on Danneel.”
“What!?”
Jensen sighs again, and decided that he had the right idea last night: he needs to be drunk for this conversation. Ignoring his headache, he reaches out for the half-filled bottle of scotch that is still standing on the table.
“Oh, no you don’t,” Chris says as he slaps Jensen’s hand away from the bottle.
Jensen groans, miserable.
“No Jen, you’re not going to drink away your problems!” Chris says angrily before regaining his composure. “You cheated on Danneel?”
Jensen nods. “Many times, with Jared.”
Chris sighs. “Okay, you need to elaborate.”
Jensen nods again and tells Chris about the first time he and Jared hooked up, at the end of season two during a cast party. He’d been drunk and he had found himself kissing Jared, before dragging him back to his hotel room. At least that time he’d had the excuse of being drunk. What had started out as a great friendship slowly developed into a painful relationship.
He tells Chris that, despite being happy with Danneel, he always found his way back to Jared’s arms.
“Last week, at the con, he told me he’s had enough. Changed the locks to the house and everything. After a year of being together!”
Chris frowns at him. “After a year of you cheating on Danneel with him,” he states slowly.
Jensen shakes his head, wanting to deny it even if it was the truth. It didn’t matter anymore, it was over now anyway.
“You love him,” Chris says, and Jensen nods. “Then maybe you need to break up with Danneel,” Chris adds.
Jensen knows that; he had already realized it even through his drunken haze. He needs to start over, needs a clean slate. And no matter how much he tells himself he loves Danneel, he recognizes that it just isn’t enough.
Jensen can’t stop the tears from falling, no matter how hard he tries. He feels like a loser for crying on his friend’s shoulder, but it hurts so much.
“It’s okay Jen, you’ll be fine,” Chris says, and keeps repeating it until Jensen almost believes him.
***
“You know it’s not unusual for a woman to cry during sex. Sometimes they experience an orgasm so big they get emotional. Doesn’t mean they’re sad though,” Chad says.
Jared frowns. He doesn’t know why his friend is telling him this, but figures Chad is trying to cheer him up. After leaving the convention, Jared went straight home and called Chad, though he knew the other man was enjoying his vacation. Chad, good friend he is, came right away. He still doesn’t know what is bothering Jared, not yet anyway. And Jared has no idea how (or if) to tell him.
Jared had been stupid to let this thing with Jensen go on for a year. He had been so scared when he made the first move over a year ago, and then elated when Jensen came to him the time after that. He should have known that Jensen would never break up with Danneel. She is so damned perfect that Jared can’t even really hate her. Despite Jensen saying he loved him, Jared should have known that they were never meant to be more than fuck buddies.
“Dude are you even listening to me?” Chad says.
Jared looks up at his friend, and realizes he has drifted off again, thinking about Jensen-the one thing he had hoped Chad would distract him from.
“I’m gay.” It comes out of his mouth before he realizes it.
Chad gives him a sceptical look. “Gay?”
Jared nods. “I-I had this thing with a guy. Jensen. And after that I. . .” he trails off, unable to continue.
“Gay?” Chad asks again.
“Yes.”
Chad shrugs. “Just because of one night with Jensen?”
Jared wants to tell him it was more, that it was a relationship, but he decides it doesn’t matter. It’s all in the past now.
“Yeah, I wanted you to be the first to know, you know, before I told anyone else,” Jared says.
“I think you need to be sure before you tell your parents,” Chad says, then nods. “We should go out, find you a couple of guys to date. Just so you know it wasn’t a fluke. I mean, if you squint, Jensen can look a bit like a girl.”
Jared can’t help but laugh at that. But Chad has a point; Jared needs to see what is out there, and try to get over Jensen.
“Yeah, let’s go out,” he says, and although the smile feels forced now, he knows one day it will be genuine again.
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