Hay Kids, This is why Computer Games are Bad, mmkay?
Gather around, children. I have a tale of woe from 10 years ago that might just give you a little perspective in your own lives, be you 14 or 44.
10 years ago I was an 8th grade student at Herbert J. Hoover Junior High School in my hometown of Melbourne. I played soccer and was an avid surfer and beachgoer. Popular enough I suppose. My grades left something to be desired - they always have - but nothing catastrophic.
Then came Starcraft.
If you've ever heard me wax nostalgic, you might've heard me mention that 1998-ish, I placed 8th on the USEast Starcraft ladder (terran, encroaching defense) - basically, I came in eighth out of about 15000 ladder players in the Eastern US at the time. This was because I was fairly obsessed with the game. I'd come home from school and play 8 games in a row. I didn't hang out with my friends nearly as much, I forgot I even had homework, much less thought about doing it, and ruined my parent's cautious hopes that I'd be different from other teenagers.
Shouldn't have bought me that computer, guys! LOL!
So anyway, that was just a distant memory - until I cleaned out a few boxes that've been sitting around for ages in preparation to move to a new apartment. I found a report card from right around that time.
FUCKING AWESOME GRADES GET!!!
If you're wondering about the classes I didn't completely blow...
so am I.
Well, as for history, I find the subject fascinating, but I find science fascinating too. What gave me that C was that Mr. Deppner was 75 and quite senile. He didn't keep track of grades - the only reason I didn't get an A is he didn't like my attitude.
As for striking objects, well, I definitely deserved that later in life, when I broke my hand 28 times striking various objects. But honestly I have no fucking clue what that class was about or who Ray was.
Anyway, now the wonderful fellows at Blizzard entertainment have created an even more devestating form of internet cancer, WoW. AND Starcraft 2 is coming up.
Will I be buying a copy? Hell yes. Will I be buying a new computer just to play it? Quite possibly.
Will I play online? No. Fuck that.
So if you've found your life suffering, even in the slightest, from your online habits, I hope you can learn a lesson from this. I was fortunate that middle school grades count for approximately cock in the grand scheme of things (I didn't even need summer school after this travesty) but it could have been much worse.
Saavy? Wisdom GET?
10 years ago I was an 8th grade student at Herbert J. Hoover Junior High School in my hometown of Melbourne. I played soccer and was an avid surfer and beachgoer. Popular enough I suppose. My grades left something to be desired - they always have - but nothing catastrophic.
Then came Starcraft.
If you've ever heard me wax nostalgic, you might've heard me mention that 1998-ish, I placed 8th on the USEast Starcraft ladder (terran, encroaching defense) - basically, I came in eighth out of about 15000 ladder players in the Eastern US at the time. This was because I was fairly obsessed with the game. I'd come home from school and play 8 games in a row. I didn't hang out with my friends nearly as much, I forgot I even had homework, much less thought about doing it, and ruined my parent's cautious hopes that I'd be different from other teenagers.
Shouldn't have bought me that computer, guys! LOL!
So anyway, that was just a distant memory - until I cleaned out a few boxes that've been sitting around for ages in preparation to move to a new apartment. I found a report card from right around that time.
FUCKING AWESOME GRADES GET!!!
If you're wondering about the classes I didn't completely blow...
so am I.
Well, as for history, I find the subject fascinating, but I find science fascinating too. What gave me that C was that Mr. Deppner was 75 and quite senile. He didn't keep track of grades - the only reason I didn't get an A is he didn't like my attitude.
As for striking objects, well, I definitely deserved that later in life, when I broke my hand 28 times striking various objects. But honestly I have no fucking clue what that class was about or who Ray was.
Anyway, now the wonderful fellows at Blizzard entertainment have created an even more devestating form of internet cancer, WoW. AND Starcraft 2 is coming up.
Will I be buying a copy? Hell yes. Will I be buying a new computer just to play it? Quite possibly.
Will I play online? No. Fuck that.
So if you've found your life suffering, even in the slightest, from your online habits, I hope you can learn a lesson from this. I was fortunate that middle school grades count for approximately cock in the grand scheme of things (I didn't even need summer school after this travesty) but it could have been much worse.
Saavy? Wisdom GET?