Today is the last F1 Sunday of the year, the season finally comes to an end. It's more emotional than ever.
Last year my all time favourite driver, my idol, my hero retired. I was a mess of emotions, I was sad, it was like a nightmare. I just wanted to wake up and see him racing again, but it was still easier than after his first retirement. After that I stopped watching Formula 1 for a while, it was so heartbreakig. He's the reason I started watching the sport, so no wonder I was so depressed. When he came back I started from the beginning.
Then I've already knew the kid called Sebastian Vettel, I saw a few race or a part of them in 2007 before I completely stopped watching the sport and I was stunned by the young boy's accomplishment. I can remember as I stood up after he crossed the finishing line in Indianapolis, stared at the TV and just said to myself: "once this boy will achive great things." And look, I was right. I was always looking after him even when I suspended my F1 weekends. And when Michael came back I had two drivers to cheer for.
All in all last year though I was sad about the fact Michael would retire it was nothing compare to what I felt in 2006 after his first retirement.
And now it's a different feeling again. This time it's Mark who leaves this beautiful sport and searching after new challanges in Porsche Le Mans. I can absolutely understand his feelings for the sport, that he's disappointed and lost all his motivation. I respect his decision and I think it'll be good for him since it's a new thing in his life, a little bit change. Maybe he will have a better career there, I don't know. I only know that I'm watching F1 since my childhood, that I can't even tell you the exect first race I've ever seen cause I was so little I can't even remember it, it's like a part of my life, I grove up watching it just as I'm breathing, or drinking or sleeping. And when Mark started his F1 career I was a kid, I literally watched his life in Formula one from the first day till the last and it's just unbearably painful he won't be a part of this family anymore. I know he won't stop his career as a racing driver, it's not about that, and I feel shame for all of those who can't understand what we feel. Those who will miss him, who could cry about this last race, just because it's so cool telling the "swish" to everyone. Well, my friend, the thing is I'm mostly sad because with Mark's retirement I feel like a paragraph of my life is terminating. There will be only Jenson Button and Fernando Alonso from that old generation who were racing even in my childhood and it's so hard to let that time go. Next year everything will be different, there won't be Mark, Felipe, who was a part of the Ferrari family for many years (even during Michael's career) will be in the Williams team, we will have V6 turbo engines, new rules... Of course I'm afraid of changing and I want the old times back. The whole sport is going in the wrong way with all these rules and as much as I'm waiting for the next season seeing the new cars in their missions I'm so nervous about it. I'm getting older, just like the sport. New drivers are younger and younger, and soon or later FIA will regulating everything which is - in my opinion - not good for the sport at all. So there are plenty of reasons why I'm so depressed by Mark's retirement. It's not only because I love him and will miss him, but also because it's like a sign of the new time which I'm afraid of a bit.
But yes, I will miss him very much, and I must tell maybe Formula 1 won't be the same without him in the first few races, I surely will used to it by time, like everyone. Because that's how life works. But Red Bull will not be the same again. Mark was a part of this family for so many years and it's hard to imagine the team without him, even with all the fight and scandals I think they were a good team together. I just hope one day all the bad memories will transform into a wonderful period of his life for him and Mark will appreciate these times.
Anyway, good luck to Mark, I hope he will have a way better life there than he had in the last few years, and he can find his motivation again.
Thank you Mark for all the strength and persistence you gave us and taught us during your beautiful career. We love you!