The old friends are always the best: I don't know where else I can go, mother. You think you're so funny. You're so clever. So very entertaining. But you've just got this broken feeling as it all slips away. Too many relationships are bamboo clothes: soft and light, but never last. The sun shines so bright. The sea is beautiful. It's clear for ( Read more... )

Feast days in miniature. Piecing together who's left. Life as half-remembered dream in half-remembered dream. Actions as tragedy then as farce then as boring tedium. Telephone calls of communication replaced by video acting, performance of rituals. Religious confusion, loss, drifting. Life as over-complicated jigsaw. Need to solve the puzzle.

Spending a day out of everything spilling my guts into a toilet is both my natural state of being, and about the best way i could spend this eve.

Out the door. Waiting with ghosts in my head. Old town, full of absences. And old friends. Days of future passing, from the unanswerability of "what do you want?" Familial disintegrations, breaking of brotherly bonds. Why is it I'm still desparate to talk to anyone but my parents, as they mourn the separation from theirs. Weight of time, genetics, ( Read more... )

Eternal insomnia brings infernal paranoia. Stumble to shower, wash away the year. It's been a bad one. "Mental illness is not an unlimited excuse to hurt those closest to you." Taking the long journey to home-that's-not-home, corrupted data keeping the present at bay. Man out of time or time out of mind ( Read more... )

Wake, from a deep unsatisfying sleep. Shake this unbecoming lethargy. Breathe, shave, run. Just try to move. All my limbs are leaden: without the pills, no energy, like labour at the polls. Dance through the stations of the pilgrimage. Bombard brain with sounds from the past, fight for freedom of the tyrants of my memory and my self-absorption. How ( Read more... )

Life goes on. The changes of life, the circle of life. Teeth breaking, gums bleeding. The history of our work, a life's story in income, protected or otherwise. Age catches us all, we move on. (The worst part of a break-up is realising how someone you love has scarred you.) And move upwards, getting to a better chamber. As thousands of new members ( Read more... )

Rest. Reforge bridges over broken hopes. Laugh at our foolish friends on either side. Finding the finder, finding good games, common ground. Finding our voice. Old friends, new support. I can't miss a free lunch. Crawling from the wreckage, half-spun plans resurging. The shards I've built up and ears I've won. Messaging a member as I fall asleep. ( Read more... )

No sleep and a No vote: not the world I wanted, but the world we've got. I'm half my father's age, and less than half the man he's been. Friends disgusted that I dare to have a belief, or to try and change a thing ( Read more... )

Bounding up to sign a census, with a dog old enough to vote. One last day of trying the friendliest way of bringing down the government ever. Running around with no moments rest, getting word out to the people. Dementia emergencies, a sort of bigoted woman, too many smoke breaks, addresses that don't exist. Exhaustion, cameraderie and dehydration ( Read more... )