Ben & Jerry's + Conan = Heaven
Late night ice cream runs are so fun. I first went to Sav-a -center because they are wonderful and stay open late. SO I get strawberries, water and Ben & Jerry's. I go to pay, but oops I dont have my wallet. The cashier gives me a look of death so I offer to take the ice cream back. Um that really doesnt lessen the severity of the death glare.
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(2) "Remember smiles are good for business." Don't knock it 'til you've done it. She was probably thinking "Great. I work late so that people like this doof can waste my life away. Thanks, asshole." And how do I know this? Because I worked at a grocery store and that's precisely how just about everyone thinks. Nothing you necessarily did or said is the cause of the unhappiness but it's there and someone has to be the target. I once had a guy demand for me to smile. I smiled. And when he walked away I flipped him off.
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