Chapter One

Jun 19, 2009 20:04


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Comments 11

iluvaus June 20 2009, 01:04:35 UTC
Awww!

I love the introspective tone of this chapter! So amazing! :D

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eastvale June 21 2009, 09:07:01 UTC
I'm so glad. I really love using first-person and I'm excited that I'm able to use it in this story. :)

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eastvale June 21 2009, 09:08:22 UTC
Wow..your comment made my night. :) Thank you so much. I will be updating with another chapter in the next few days.

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shadefell July 16 2009, 17:46:41 UTC
You keep using "civilians." Did you mean to use "citizens?" Or are they near an army base?

Your photos are absolutely lovely.

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eastvale July 16 2009, 18:43:26 UTC
Are you sure? I looked up the word 'civilian' on Dictionary.com and it doesn't seem to relate to an 'army base' but rather a nonmilitary person, a private citizen.

I'm a journalism major and we use the term 'civilian journalism' frequently to refer to normal, everyday people who take a story into their own hands and become the journalist.

And thank you for your comment, I'm really glad you like the pictures. :)

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shadefell July 16 2009, 18:51:20 UTC
"Civilian" generally refers to people who aren't in the military, and can be used in a tongue in cheek way to refer to people who aren't part of a particular, inclusive profession. So you have "civilian journalism" (which I've never heard, I've heard of citizen journalism and amateur journalism, but that makes sense as a phrase) and you have bartenders who refer to people who buy kegs as civilians, etc. It's a word that is used in a very specific context, not a general one ( ... )

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eastvale July 16 2009, 18:55:49 UTC
No way, I appreciate you pointing this out and I will definitely research the word further - I had never thought of it being used in the way you described. :) I've also never heard of 'citizen journalism' but rather 'civilian journalism' before which is probably why I use civilian in the way I did for chapter one. Again, thank you for enlightening me. :)

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shower_scream July 22 2009, 16:36:19 UTC
Do you mind if I add you? This is an amazing example of beautiful storytelling. Some others, hmm, leave something to be desired. Doesn't suck you in. Yours? I really like :)

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starling_1 August 12 2009, 20:48:58 UTC
I am in total awe...you are awake?? I am stunned! Love the first person POV you are using! Incredible work! I hope I can add a liink from my site.

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