i had to coax heather through a mental break down and then it became too late for her to do anything. that was pointless. heh. she's so cute when she's upset ( Read more... )

i was cleaning out my fridge this afternoon. my god, i found some wierd things including: milk with the consistency of catsup, a potato with 5 inch roots growing out of it, a bag of brown goop (no idea what it originally was), moldy rice, and a bag of toe nail clippings ( Read more... )

sex with jerry seinfield.

one moment. i think i'm going to puke again.

not that this affects any of you in any way or anything, but my ruler smells like chlorine and it's driving me insane. DOES MY RULER GO TO THE POOL WITHOUT ME? and if so, where the hell did it get enough money for a pool membership? can rulers sell their bodies? is it even possible for them to DO anything? am i hoarding a ruler-prostitute in my ( Read more... )

probably not. none of you are affected by the shortage of food stamps and no help with medical care. but dammit, i am ( Read more... )

ya know, we film animals having sex and it's educational...we film humans having sex and it's immoral. what's up with that ( Read more... )

sometimes you just have to take charge.

ask me four questions. any four quesitons. i'll answer them truthfully. but in return, you have to post this in your livejournal and allow me to ask you four.

well, it probably isn't but i think it is. the girl's breats flopping around are kind of hypnotizing and the guy is really over-wieght. and i didn't think it was possible to achieve that position ( Read more... )

some guy wrote me a note a few days ago. i still don't know who did it but due to popular demand, im going to post the full thing in my journal. this is an exact copy, grammer mistakes and all ( Read more... )