(no subject)
Post Moot fic, crossposted from the LT fic comm, for those who don't read it.
Her return had not been easy. Delaying in the Southlands, then the guildhouse, until she could delay no more, she had still walked as slowly as possible to the Colleseum. Her guards had noticed, of course, but they knew better than to press the matter. Because who would want to arrive to empty chambers? To the silent, judging faces of his pack (never hers, never properly, they would never accept her, at least in her mind), to the hastily emptied rooms of her children, to a cold bed that could only remind her of how thoroughly she'd failed him; how could she hurry to such reminders?
Oh, they had discussed it, the sacrifices she would have to make if the unthinkable happened, and suddenly she had a guild to run. But neither of them had even considered that he would be taken and she would have to entrust his rescue to someone else. How could such a thought even cross their minds? He was the strong one, the military man, and much as she'd argue it she was the vunerable one. Not the other way round.
But then he was taken by one of a hundred possible enemies and the guild had needed her. It had taken every logical thread in her weave to stop herself from running into the circle and transporting to Malar knows where to search, to scream to the ancestors, to beg for him back. She had managed, somehow, asked those she trusted most to search and think for her while she tried to pretend she was as good as Tapper, as Wen, as Treacle, as those gone before. Even if she knew it was one giant facade, that a Breed from the Valley could lead a guild, and such an important one at that.
The effort had been made, however, and the guild hadn't fallen apart, the University was slowly falling and the people of Edreja were still being healed. Now though, away from campaign, back in her own home it was harder to focus on such things. All she could see at the current moment was the gaping space where he should be, countering her insecurities, telling her how well she'd done and ranting about the Legions. Holding her close and making her whole.
And there was no sign, no clue, no starting point to work from. He had been dragged into a transport circle and from there....from there he could be anywhere. The only consolation she had was that Cu Faoil was sure he was taken alive, and nobody bothered to take a living prisoner simply to kill them on the other side of the circle. Torture them, maybe, or interrogate or possess or mutilate yet again with surgery but not kill. So somewhere out there, somewhere on the egg, he was alive and she could save him.
Or they could save him. The faction she'd had to leave behind would rally together for one of their own, as they always did, as they were doing for Lenia and now him. Even if she had turned her back on them and claimed no nation, only the guild. Even if she had broken down with Hengist while explaining why she had to renounce her oath and walk away from a people who had become her family. They would hold no grudge and they would find him for her, because he was a Lion even if she was not, because that was what they did. Looked after their own.
Her return had not been easy. Delaying in the Southlands, then the guildhouse, until she could delay no more, she had still walked as slowly as possible to the Colleseum. Her guards had noticed, of course, but they knew better than to press the matter. Because who would want to arrive to empty chambers? To the silent, judging faces of his pack (never hers, never properly, they would never accept her, at least in her mind), to the hastily emptied rooms of her children, to a cold bed that could only remind her of how thoroughly she'd failed him; how could she hurry to such reminders?
Oh, they had discussed it, the sacrifices she would have to make if the unthinkable happened, and suddenly she had a guild to run. But neither of them had even considered that he would be taken and she would have to entrust his rescue to someone else. How could such a thought even cross their minds? He was the strong one, the military man, and much as she'd argue it she was the vunerable one. Not the other way round.
But then he was taken by one of a hundred possible enemies and the guild had needed her. It had taken every logical thread in her weave to stop herself from running into the circle and transporting to Malar knows where to search, to scream to the ancestors, to beg for him back. She had managed, somehow, asked those she trusted most to search and think for her while she tried to pretend she was as good as Tapper, as Wen, as Treacle, as those gone before. Even if she knew it was one giant facade, that a Breed from the Valley could lead a guild, and such an important one at that.
The effort had been made, however, and the guild hadn't fallen apart, the University was slowly falling and the people of Edreja were still being healed. Now though, away from campaign, back in her own home it was harder to focus on such things. All she could see at the current moment was the gaping space where he should be, countering her insecurities, telling her how well she'd done and ranting about the Legions. Holding her close and making her whole.
And there was no sign, no clue, no starting point to work from. He had been dragged into a transport circle and from there....from there he could be anywhere. The only consolation she had was that Cu Faoil was sure he was taken alive, and nobody bothered to take a living prisoner simply to kill them on the other side of the circle. Torture them, maybe, or interrogate or possess or mutilate yet again with surgery but not kill. So somewhere out there, somewhere on the egg, he was alive and she could save him.
Or they could save him. The faction she'd had to leave behind would rally together for one of their own, as they always did, as they were doing for Lenia and now him. Even if she had turned her back on them and claimed no nation, only the guild. Even if she had broken down with Hengist while explaining why she had to renounce her oath and walk away from a people who had become her family. They would hold no grudge and they would find him for her, because he was a Lion even if she was not, because that was what they did. Looked after their own.