OOC: Log Post
Who: Pein and Deidara
What: Deidara trying unsuccessfully to get into Pein's pants
Where: Akatsuki House #2, Pein and Konan's bedroom
When: Tuesday, October 2nd
Why: Deidara's in heat and trying to nail all the Akatsuki.
Also: Pein's a pervert. No big news there. Fighting. Swearing. Man bits.
Deidara: Pein-daana~ Where are yooou, hn? *almost skips down the hall way, licking the walls as he does and kicks random objects out of the way*
Pein: *is sitting in his room, futzing around on his laptop* *doesn't say anything when he hears Deidara calling for him*
Deidara: I can hear you typing~ *is grinning manically as he reaches Pein's bedroom door* *bangs on it loudly* Open up, hn.
Pein: *door is unlocked* STFU, I'm busy.
Deidara: You should, and shall, be busy with me. *pulls out a little birdie and drops it near Pein's door* KATSU! *door explodes violently into thousands of tiny pieces*
Pein: *looks up from his laptop as the door disintegrates* ... Deidara. You're fucking lucky I've got spare doors in this house or you'd be a dead man. *actually notices Deidara as the smoke clears* You shouldn't fucking go around exploding things like that unless you want charred bits. And I'm not talking about the ones you'll find on the floor, but the ones between your legs. *can't fucking believe... actually, this is Deidara, makes perfect sense that he'd fucking walk around naked exploding doors with an intent to molest*
Deidara: Why thank you for taking a keen interest in my bits, Pein-daana. *is practically crooning as he steps through the rubble, kicking shards across the room and generally spreading the mess about* They'll be in very safe hands, again, soon enough, hn?
Pein: *scowls* The only hands they'll be in are your own, unless you go find someone else to bother.
Deidara: Now, now, Pein-daana, no need to be so testy, hm? *leers*
Pein: I'm not the one going around exploding people's doors, Deidara.
Deidara: They're in the way between what I want. *climbs onto the bed* They have to go.
Pein: *was sitting on his bed already* *pushes Deidara away with his foot* It's called a fucking doorknob and when you turn it, the door opens.
Deidara: *grabs Pein's leg, licking his calf as he pulls him towards him* That takes time and I'm very busy and impatient. Now shut up already, hn.
Pein: Gyah! *flails and kicks at Deidara* Leave me alone.
Deidara: When you're all bare chested and so easy? I think not. *nips at his leg, ignoring at attempts at kicking him off*
Pein: I AM NOT EASY. *glares* And leave my leg the fuck alone.
Deidara: Yes, you are, and no, I wont. *pounces*
Pein: *manages to close his laptop and shove it out of the way to safety before he's pounced on* I have a girlfriend, Deidara. There's plenty of other SINGLE Akatsuki members that you can go molest.
Deidara: I'm working my way through. *smirks and squirms over him* I can not believe I allowed myself to go years without.... *sighs dramatically s he paws at Pein's pants*
Pein: OMFG. How many fucking times did I tell you to go get laid or wank or something? Why the fuck didn't you listen? And I'm one member you're not going to "work your way through". *grabs Deidara by the wrist, effectively pulling his hand away from his pants*
Deidara: You say that now... *pulls at his wrist* Kinky. Do you want to tie me down? You can, you know, hn. If you like that type of thing. *licks all three of his lips*
Pein: *shudders, though from what emotion he isn't sure* If I fucking tie you down, it won't be in my room, and I won't be sticking around.
Deidara: *reaches forward with his other hand and licks down the front of Pein's chest* You don't mean that, do you, hn? You wanna fuck me, don't you, hn?
Pein: *flails* Keep your tongues to yourself, Deidara! And yes, I fucking mean it. I'm not fucking ruining my relationship with my girlfriend in order to mess around with you.
Deidara: But my tongues like you, Pein-daana. *licks at the hand currently wrapped around his wrist* And you fucked Hidan. Am I not as good as him, hn? HN?! *bites an exposed nipple. Hard.*
Pein: That was fucking before I got into a fight with Konan about it. *practically screeches* FUCK, THAT HURT!
Deidara: *glowers* That was the general point *does it again but doesn't let go*
Pein: *was at least somewhat expecting it this time* dksajkasldj Deidara, stop it right now.
Deidara: *yanks. yanks. yanks* Does it hurt? *looks curious*
Pein: YES, IT FUCKING HURTS. *squirms, trying to get away without LOSING his nipple in the process*
Deidara: Hmmmmm. *pokes his tongue at it, still not letting go and increases pressure* Do you want me to pierce it for you? *leans forward so that his hair falls over his face*
Pein: If I fucking want it pierced, I'll go get the guy who did all my other piercings to do it. *is probably enjoying the attention to his nipple more than he should* Now get the fuck off of me before I make you fucking regret trying anything.
Deidara: You're a big boy, can't you get me off yourself? By all means, get me off, hn. *laughs in his face*
Pein: I'm not fucking getting you off that way, Deidara. Just fucking give up. *rolls them over so that Deidara is under him* *grabs Deidara's wrist with one hand and his fingers with the other and starts pulling the hand (and it's mouth) away from his nipple, grimacing as it's still biting down* Fucking let go, now.
Deidara: Ohhh. I like this, hn. *makes himself comfortable by wrapping his legs and other arm tightly around Pein, snuggling his face in between his neck and shoulder and licking him* And no, I don't think I will.
Pein: I didn't fucking do this for you to like it. I fucking did it to get away. *squirms, trying to get out of Deidara's grip, though the squirming is pretty ineffective* No means no, Deidara.
Deidara: Get away? Why would you do that, hn? *bites Pein's throat with his mouth mouth. erm* No means yes. I'll say no and mean yes if you want, Pein-daana. Come on. Fuck me, hn.
Pein: NO DOES NOT MEAN YES. AND STOP FUCKING BITING ME, YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE MARKS EVERYWHERE AND KONAN IS GOING TO FUCKING BE PISSED. *flails and rolls them off the bed onto the floor, hoping that the rough landing will allow him to escape*
Deidara: *is dragged off the bed onto the floor and lands on top of Pein* *is accidentally, but quite happily, kissing Pen because of the fall*
Pein: *was shouting as they fell so his mouth was open* *closes his mouth and bites down on Deidara's tongue because it's in his mouth where it doesn't belong*
Deidara: *squirms and flails and smacks and hits and kicks and slaps at Pein at every open space of body that he can reach* *knees him in the groin. repeatedly*
Pein: *tries to roll away in all the hitting and kicking, but winds up crouched on the floor cupping himself* *is in a LOT of pain* OMFG DEIDARA. WTF?
Deidara: *is holding his poor tongue* *didn't really hurt but that isn't the point* You BIT my TONGUE, HN.
Pein: You BIT my NIPPLE. REPEATEDLY. *doesn't think he'll be having sex for a week, his cock hurts so much* *is still holding it for protection in case Deidara decides to attack again*
Deidara: You have another nipple! And you don't use them for important things, hn! *is sulking and pissy and horny* Hn.... *glowers at Pein and then smiles very slowly* Pein-daana...
Pein: You have more tongues than I do nipples. *notices the look Deidara is giving him* O.O STAY AWAY FROM ME.
Deidara: *creeps towards Pein very carefully, licking his lips again* Pein...
Pein: *would run, but can't fucking move from a combination of fear and PAIN* *Deidara should know better than to injure the family jewels* GTFO. RIGHT NOW!
Deidara: No, I think I will stay. *pounces once more, shoving Pein back and straddles him, pinning his arms down with his knees above his head* I think I like this position.
Pein: *closes his eyes because he doesn't need to see Deidara's bits that up close and personally* I don't. *would, but knows if he appreciated it, he'd be dying at the hands of his girlfriend very soon*
Deidara: No? *grins really wide and starts shifting, taking advantage of Pein's closed eyes to pretend he is wanking and freak Pein out* *breaths heavily* You know you want to...
Pein: *its totally working, he's freaking the fuck out* I DON'T. WHAT PART OF NO DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
Deidara: All of it. *fake!moans and begins to rock on Pein* *Watches him carefully, waiting for a reaction and chance to get him to actually give in* Come on. You can look if you can't touch, hn. I'd rather you did more than touch but...
Pein: *groans* *peeks out of one eye to find that Deidara isn't even wanking* *through gritted teeth* I fucking hate you.
Deidara: *laughs manically and leans forward to rest their foreheads together* Wanna put that anger to get use, hm? Surely you want to fuck someone who is practically a virgin, but not really. I'd feel like one though....*rubs himself shamelessly against him*
Pein: As fucking tempting as the offer is, right now putting my anger to good use would be beating the shit out of you, not fucking you. *is really trying hard to ignore how stimulating Deidara is being*
Deidara: Such a strong will, Pein. I thought you could do anything you want, hm? Who is the boss in your relationship? *actually beings touching himself now, panting into Pein's ear* Don't be soo denying to yourself, hn...
Pein: *makes eye contact with Deidara, giving him the stare down* Who the fuck says I'm not doing what I want, Deidara? My want to remain with my girlfriend fucking exceeds my want for anything else.
Deidara: *nips at his earlobe* All talk. Too much talk, hn. Talk less...
Pein: *sighs* I'll fucking look, but don't touch me and I'm not going to touch you.
Deidara: *leaves a mark on his throat* Well, that is a slight improvement, hn...
Pein: *hopes that Deidara didn't actually succeed in leaving a mark on him* It's all the fucking improvement you're getting.
Deidara: *sits up and attempts to rip Pein's pants off* This is in my way, hn.
Pein: O.O I TOLD YOU NO TOUCHING. MY PANTS STAY ON. *brings his hands together above his head* I'LL FUCKING JUSTU YOU IF YOU TRY IT.
Deidara: *gets his hand inside of pants* I'm so scared, hn... *licks Pein's abdomen*
Pein: How does a cold shower sound, Deidara?
Deidara: Distracting, hn. *pulls pants down slightly* Nice underwear, Pein-daana
Pein: *sighs* Hands out of my pants, or I will make sure you get a fucking cold shower.
Deidara: Blah blah blah, hn. Shut up. You are too noisy in the wrong ways. *tears pants* Oops
Pein: *does the hand seal to make it rain freezing cold right on top of Deidara* *doesn't mind the cold himself because he still hurts from the multiple knee to groin action he was on the receiving end of*
Deidara: *shrieks and leaps back, landing in a crouched position near the door, dripping wet and pissed* You stupid shit! Why'd you do that for, hn?
Pein: *stops the rain and sits up* Because you wouldn't fucking listen.
Deidara: *glares at him, wishing he had more clay bird with him to throw at his face* I hate you, hn.
Pein: *reaches up to the bed and grabs a blanket, tossing it to Deidara* Dry off and warm up.
Deidara: *grabs it and quickly wraps it around himself, not taking his eyes off Pein* Really fucking hate you, hn.
Pein: *rolls eyes* You fucking don't. You wouldn't have been all over me if you did.
Deidara: I don't need to like you. I just want a fuck. *gets ready to do something*
Pein: ... Doesn't fucking matter. I told you I'm not going to cheat on Konan again.
Deidara: *leaps at Pein and bites him in three places at once, hard enough to bruise* Good luck with that, hn.
Pein: *screams* DEIDARA. FUCK YOU.
Deidara: *stands up, giving Pein a bit of a kick or two, because he's REALLY pissed and insane >_>* Deal with it, hn.
Pein: *is bruised and bitten all over* Deidara, leave now.
Deidara: *glowers and spins around, stumbling over the blanket* Fine -- fine, hn.
Pein: *sighs* If you hadn't done that last few kicks and bites, I would've let you stay.
Deidara: *looks back and snarls bitterly* Sure you would've, hn.
Pein: I have no reason to lie about that. *rubs idly at one of the bite marks* I really would have enjoyed watching.
Deidara: Hmph. Pervert. *grins faintly as he adjusts the blanket* I'd suggest using that water of your on those, hn...
Pein: *laughs* I know I'm a fucking pervert.
Deidara: *smirks and turns around, facing Pein as he backs out of the room* Indeed, hn. Sweet dream, Pein-daana. *flashes Pein and winks, licking his lips teasingly*
Pein: Can I at least get my fucking blanket back?
Deidara: *drops the blanket by the door, twirling on the spot as he leaves the room behind in search of more excitement and sexual exploits *
Pein: *shakes his head and sighs as he gets up to grab the blanket* *maybe peeks down the hall to watch Deidara as he leaves* *works on cleaning up the mess that Deidara made of the room and of himself*
Who: Pein and Konan
What: Pein cleans up after Deidara leaves and explains to Konan what happened.
Where: Akatsuki House #2, Pein and Konan's bedroom
When: Tuesday, October 2nd
Why: Because we wanted to log them and this just happened to make sense.
Also: Very schmoopy. I didn't know evil could be so cute.
Pein: *is laying in bed after having replaced the door and cleaning up after Deidara* *futzing around on his laptop, trying not to think about all the pain he's in*
Konan: *opens the door* Pein? Deidara's in a mood, you know anything about it?
Pein: *sets his laptop aside when he hears Konan come in* Unfortunately yes. *doesn't think it'll take a genius to notice all the bite marks and bruises* *just hopes Konan will trust that he didn't do anything he shouldn't have*
Konan: .....*stares at* What..... what happened to you. *sits down next to him on the bed*
Pein: Deidara fucking happened. *leans over and rests his head on Konan's shoulder* He wasn't too happy that I wouldn't give in and have sex with him.
Konan: *small smile and runs a hand though his hair* I'm proud. But....
Pein: *sighs* I didn't fucking want anything from him in the first place. He just barged in here trying to get me to.
Konan: *stares at hands* I know... it's just... I do love you but I can't help but feel like maybe you'd rather not have just me.
Pein: *looks up at her* Why do you think that?
Konan: *shrugs, doesn't look at him* I don't know. I mean.... you love me and I love you and that should be it, right?
Pein: *nods* It should be.
Konan: And it is.... but... I don't want to limit you but I want you with me.
Pein: *reaches up and runs a hand through her hair, effectively making sure she's looking at him* You're not limiting me. There should be no need for limiting at all. I'm sorry that I fucked up and made you feel like this.
Konan: *smiles* You're forgiven, you know that. It's just.... we've got a lot to work out, together.
Pein: I know. But hearing you talk like that makes me feel bad. *is such a sap omfg*
Konan: *kisses* You should feel bad, but I don't want you to feel miserable.
Pein: *kisses back* I'm only feeling miserable because of all this. *motions to the bite marks and bruises* The family jewels bore witness to Deidara's rage, too. Multiple times.
Konan: *clucks* My poor Pein, so abused by everyone.
Pein: Ko-chan, that sounded condescending.
Konan: *fake gasp* Nonsense!
Pein: *sticks his tongue out at Konan* Instead of teasing me, maybe you could help me out a bit?
Konan: *smirk* Maybe. *focus chakra* Where does it hurt the most?
Pein: *lifts up the waistband of his pj pants and withdraws a melted pack of ice* There.
Konan: *laughs* * places hand on the very fragile family jewels* I can't believe he punched you in the nuts.
Pein: Didn't punch. He used his knee. I stopped counting after the third time. *doesn't find this funny at all*
Konan: *slightly shocked face* All because you wouldn't sleep with him?
Pein: No, it was because I bit his tongue when he tried to kiss me.
Konan: He tried to kiss you? *eyes narrow*
Pein: Yes. He took advantage of the fact that I was yelling at him and had an open mouth.
Konan: I'm proud of your self control. *kisses*
Pein: *kisses* *definitely brushed his teeth between the time when Deidara left and now* As attractive as I find him when he's not trying to molest me, I love you more. *might not have been the best thing to say, but it was the honest one*
Konan: *eyes narrow* We're going to have to work on tact, Pein.
Pein: Sorry, Ko-chan. *shrinks down a bit and smiles at her*
Konan: *finishes healing the spot* Where next, Pein-kun? *smiles back*
Pein: Everywhere else is pretty much the same. Just anywhere you see a bruise or bite.
Konan: *starts healing from the bottom up* You are wonderful for putting up with so much abuse.
Pein: You make it sound like there was another choice. *knows there was, but he's definitely trying to earn some points*
Konan: Don't play innocent, Pein. *smiles*
Pein: *grins* Okay, I won't. I put up with it because what Deidara did to me hurt a lot less than what you would have put me through if I had given in. *is still lacking in the tact department*
Konan: *scowls* I think I prefer innocent over lack of tact.
Pein: I wasn't even thinking about what you'd put me through if I gave in while it was happening. I was only thinking about not wanting to do it and wanting you.
Konan: Sometimes one would never think you're the mastermind of an evil group bent on ruling the world. But that's why I love you.
Pein: *isn't sure if he should be insulted or not* *opts for not* Is that the only reason?
Konan: Of course not, silly. I can't list the reasons why I love you - I wouldn't know where to begin.
Pein: Good. *smirks* Then I'm definitely in love with the right girl.
Konan: *rolls eyes and finishes healing* We're just made for each other, you know?
Pein: *senses the sarcasm* Without rain, the trees couldn't grow to make paper. *doesn't even really know what he's saying*
Konan: Rain turns paper into a soggy mess.
Pein: And that's why I stop the rain for you.
Konan: I appreciate it. *kisses*
Pein: *kisses* Thanks for healing me up, Ko-chan.
Konan: Anytime, love. And I'd rather have you black and blue than cheating.
Pein: I'd rather you be happy, even if it means turning colors.
Konan: And I am happy. Very much so.
Pein: Even though I still have that wandering eye problem? *cringes a little in anticipation of her reaction*
Konan: As long as you don't act on it, I can't really complain, can I? I wish you'd stop, though.
Pein: I promise it will only be my eye that wanders. *holds his fingers up in a way that mocks every boy scout out there* And I'll work on stopping it. If I was a horse, blinders might do the trick.
Konan: *grins* Maybe blinders wouldn't be that bad of an idea....
Pein: *pouts* It's a terrible idea.
Konan: *rolls eyes* Fine. *lays down and curls up next to him* Though... it's always a choice.
Pein: *wraps his arms around her and pulls her close* It fucking isn't.
Konan: *wraps her arms around him as well* We'll see.
Pein: I can't be a proper ninja if I have no periphial vision. *kisses her cheek*
Konan: Fine, fine. *yawns slightly* If only for the sake of making sure you don't get killed.
Pein: Bit hard to keep you happy if I'm dead. *yawns* Don't you know yawns are fucking contagious?
Konan: Which is another reason to keep you alive. And I'm tired, I can't help it. I'm not a medic ninja you know.
Pein: *snuggles closer* I know you're not, and thank you. I'll lay here with you while you nap.
Konan: *closes eyes* Thanks. *mumbles slightly* Love you.
Pein: Love you, too. *presses another kiss to her cheek* *winds up falling alseep before she does*
What: Deidara trying unsuccessfully to get into Pein's pants
Where: Akatsuki House #2, Pein and Konan's bedroom
When: Tuesday, October 2nd
Why: Deidara's in heat and trying to nail all the Akatsuki.
Also: Pein's a pervert. No big news there. Fighting. Swearing. Man bits.
Deidara: Pein-daana~ Where are yooou, hn? *almost skips down the hall way, licking the walls as he does and kicks random objects out of the way*
Pein: *is sitting in his room, futzing around on his laptop* *doesn't say anything when he hears Deidara calling for him*
Deidara: I can hear you typing~ *is grinning manically as he reaches Pein's bedroom door* *bangs on it loudly* Open up, hn.
Pein: *door is unlocked* STFU, I'm busy.
Deidara: You should, and shall, be busy with me. *pulls out a little birdie and drops it near Pein's door* KATSU! *door explodes violently into thousands of tiny pieces*
Pein: *looks up from his laptop as the door disintegrates* ... Deidara. You're fucking lucky I've got spare doors in this house or you'd be a dead man. *actually notices Deidara as the smoke clears* You shouldn't fucking go around exploding things like that unless you want charred bits. And I'm not talking about the ones you'll find on the floor, but the ones between your legs. *can't fucking believe... actually, this is Deidara, makes perfect sense that he'd fucking walk around naked exploding doors with an intent to molest*
Deidara: Why thank you for taking a keen interest in my bits, Pein-daana. *is practically crooning as he steps through the rubble, kicking shards across the room and generally spreading the mess about* They'll be in very safe hands, again, soon enough, hn?
Pein: *scowls* The only hands they'll be in are your own, unless you go find someone else to bother.
Deidara: Now, now, Pein-daana, no need to be so testy, hm? *leers*
Pein: I'm not the one going around exploding people's doors, Deidara.
Deidara: They're in the way between what I want. *climbs onto the bed* They have to go.
Pein: *was sitting on his bed already* *pushes Deidara away with his foot* It's called a fucking doorknob and when you turn it, the door opens.
Deidara: *grabs Pein's leg, licking his calf as he pulls him towards him* That takes time and I'm very busy and impatient. Now shut up already, hn.
Pein: Gyah! *flails and kicks at Deidara* Leave me alone.
Deidara: When you're all bare chested and so easy? I think not. *nips at his leg, ignoring at attempts at kicking him off*
Pein: I AM NOT EASY. *glares* And leave my leg the fuck alone.
Deidara: Yes, you are, and no, I wont. *pounces*
Pein: *manages to close his laptop and shove it out of the way to safety before he's pounced on* I have a girlfriend, Deidara. There's plenty of other SINGLE Akatsuki members that you can go molest.
Deidara: I'm working my way through. *smirks and squirms over him* I can not believe I allowed myself to go years without.... *sighs dramatically s he paws at Pein's pants*
Pein: OMFG. How many fucking times did I tell you to go get laid or wank or something? Why the fuck didn't you listen? And I'm one member you're not going to "work your way through". *grabs Deidara by the wrist, effectively pulling his hand away from his pants*
Deidara: You say that now... *pulls at his wrist* Kinky. Do you want to tie me down? You can, you know, hn. If you like that type of thing. *licks all three of his lips*
Pein: *shudders, though from what emotion he isn't sure* If I fucking tie you down, it won't be in my room, and I won't be sticking around.
Deidara: *reaches forward with his other hand and licks down the front of Pein's chest* You don't mean that, do you, hn? You wanna fuck me, don't you, hn?
Pein: *flails* Keep your tongues to yourself, Deidara! And yes, I fucking mean it. I'm not fucking ruining my relationship with my girlfriend in order to mess around with you.
Deidara: But my tongues like you, Pein-daana. *licks at the hand currently wrapped around his wrist* And you fucked Hidan. Am I not as good as him, hn? HN?! *bites an exposed nipple. Hard.*
Pein: That was fucking before I got into a fight with Konan about it. *practically screeches* FUCK, THAT HURT!
Deidara: *glowers* That was the general point *does it again but doesn't let go*
Pein: *was at least somewhat expecting it this time* dksajkasldj Deidara, stop it right now.
Deidara: *yanks. yanks. yanks* Does it hurt? *looks curious*
Pein: YES, IT FUCKING HURTS. *squirms, trying to get away without LOSING his nipple in the process*
Deidara: Hmmmmm. *pokes his tongue at it, still not letting go and increases pressure* Do you want me to pierce it for you? *leans forward so that his hair falls over his face*
Pein: If I fucking want it pierced, I'll go get the guy who did all my other piercings to do it. *is probably enjoying the attention to his nipple more than he should* Now get the fuck off of me before I make you fucking regret trying anything.
Deidara: You're a big boy, can't you get me off yourself? By all means, get me off, hn. *laughs in his face*
Pein: I'm not fucking getting you off that way, Deidara. Just fucking give up. *rolls them over so that Deidara is under him* *grabs Deidara's wrist with one hand and his fingers with the other and starts pulling the hand (and it's mouth) away from his nipple, grimacing as it's still biting down* Fucking let go, now.
Deidara: Ohhh. I like this, hn. *makes himself comfortable by wrapping his legs and other arm tightly around Pein, snuggling his face in between his neck and shoulder and licking him* And no, I don't think I will.
Pein: I didn't fucking do this for you to like it. I fucking did it to get away. *squirms, trying to get out of Deidara's grip, though the squirming is pretty ineffective* No means no, Deidara.
Deidara: Get away? Why would you do that, hn? *bites Pein's throat with his mouth mouth. erm* No means yes. I'll say no and mean yes if you want, Pein-daana. Come on. Fuck me, hn.
Pein: NO DOES NOT MEAN YES. AND STOP FUCKING BITING ME, YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE MARKS EVERYWHERE AND KONAN IS GOING TO FUCKING BE PISSED. *flails and rolls them off the bed onto the floor, hoping that the rough landing will allow him to escape*
Deidara: *is dragged off the bed onto the floor and lands on top of Pein* *is accidentally, but quite happily, kissing Pen because of the fall*
Pein: *was shouting as they fell so his mouth was open* *closes his mouth and bites down on Deidara's tongue because it's in his mouth where it doesn't belong*
Deidara: *squirms and flails and smacks and hits and kicks and slaps at Pein at every open space of body that he can reach* *knees him in the groin. repeatedly*
Pein: *tries to roll away in all the hitting and kicking, but winds up crouched on the floor cupping himself* *is in a LOT of pain* OMFG DEIDARA. WTF?
Deidara: *is holding his poor tongue* *didn't really hurt but that isn't the point* You BIT my TONGUE, HN.
Pein: You BIT my NIPPLE. REPEATEDLY. *doesn't think he'll be having sex for a week, his cock hurts so much* *is still holding it for protection in case Deidara decides to attack again*
Deidara: You have another nipple! And you don't use them for important things, hn! *is sulking and pissy and horny* Hn.... *glowers at Pein and then smiles very slowly* Pein-daana...
Pein: You have more tongues than I do nipples. *notices the look Deidara is giving him* O.O STAY AWAY FROM ME.
Deidara: *creeps towards Pein very carefully, licking his lips again* Pein...
Pein: *would run, but can't fucking move from a combination of fear and PAIN* *Deidara should know better than to injure the family jewels* GTFO. RIGHT NOW!
Deidara: No, I think I will stay. *pounces once more, shoving Pein back and straddles him, pinning his arms down with his knees above his head* I think I like this position.
Pein: *closes his eyes because he doesn't need to see Deidara's bits that up close and personally* I don't. *would, but knows if he appreciated it, he'd be dying at the hands of his girlfriend very soon*
Deidara: No? *grins really wide and starts shifting, taking advantage of Pein's closed eyes to pretend he is wanking and freak Pein out* *breaths heavily* You know you want to...
Pein: *its totally working, he's freaking the fuck out* I DON'T. WHAT PART OF NO DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
Deidara: All of it. *fake!moans and begins to rock on Pein* *Watches him carefully, waiting for a reaction and chance to get him to actually give in* Come on. You can look if you can't touch, hn. I'd rather you did more than touch but...
Pein: *groans* *peeks out of one eye to find that Deidara isn't even wanking* *through gritted teeth* I fucking hate you.
Deidara: *laughs manically and leans forward to rest their foreheads together* Wanna put that anger to get use, hm? Surely you want to fuck someone who is practically a virgin, but not really. I'd feel like one though....*rubs himself shamelessly against him*
Pein: As fucking tempting as the offer is, right now putting my anger to good use would be beating the shit out of you, not fucking you. *is really trying hard to ignore how stimulating Deidara is being*
Deidara: Such a strong will, Pein. I thought you could do anything you want, hm? Who is the boss in your relationship? *actually beings touching himself now, panting into Pein's ear* Don't be soo denying to yourself, hn...
Pein: *makes eye contact with Deidara, giving him the stare down* Who the fuck says I'm not doing what I want, Deidara? My want to remain with my girlfriend fucking exceeds my want for anything else.
Deidara: *nips at his earlobe* All talk. Too much talk, hn. Talk less...
Pein: *sighs* I'll fucking look, but don't touch me and I'm not going to touch you.
Deidara: *leaves a mark on his throat* Well, that is a slight improvement, hn...
Pein: *hopes that Deidara didn't actually succeed in leaving a mark on him* It's all the fucking improvement you're getting.
Deidara: *sits up and attempts to rip Pein's pants off* This is in my way, hn.
Pein: O.O I TOLD YOU NO TOUCHING. MY PANTS STAY ON. *brings his hands together above his head* I'LL FUCKING JUSTU YOU IF YOU TRY IT.
Deidara: *gets his hand inside of pants* I'm so scared, hn... *licks Pein's abdomen*
Pein: How does a cold shower sound, Deidara?
Deidara: Distracting, hn. *pulls pants down slightly* Nice underwear, Pein-daana
Pein: *sighs* Hands out of my pants, or I will make sure you get a fucking cold shower.
Deidara: Blah blah blah, hn. Shut up. You are too noisy in the wrong ways. *tears pants* Oops
Pein: *does the hand seal to make it rain freezing cold right on top of Deidara* *doesn't mind the cold himself because he still hurts from the multiple knee to groin action he was on the receiving end of*
Deidara: *shrieks and leaps back, landing in a crouched position near the door, dripping wet and pissed* You stupid shit! Why'd you do that for, hn?
Pein: *stops the rain and sits up* Because you wouldn't fucking listen.
Deidara: *glares at him, wishing he had more clay bird with him to throw at his face* I hate you, hn.
Pein: *reaches up to the bed and grabs a blanket, tossing it to Deidara* Dry off and warm up.
Deidara: *grabs it and quickly wraps it around himself, not taking his eyes off Pein* Really fucking hate you, hn.
Pein: *rolls eyes* You fucking don't. You wouldn't have been all over me if you did.
Deidara: I don't need to like you. I just want a fuck. *gets ready to do something*
Pein: ... Doesn't fucking matter. I told you I'm not going to cheat on Konan again.
Deidara: *leaps at Pein and bites him in three places at once, hard enough to bruise* Good luck with that, hn.
Pein: *screams* DEIDARA. FUCK YOU.
Deidara: *stands up, giving Pein a bit of a kick or two, because he's REALLY pissed and insane >_>* Deal with it, hn.
Pein: *is bruised and bitten all over* Deidara, leave now.
Deidara: *glowers and spins around, stumbling over the blanket* Fine -- fine, hn.
Pein: *sighs* If you hadn't done that last few kicks and bites, I would've let you stay.
Deidara: *looks back and snarls bitterly* Sure you would've, hn.
Pein: I have no reason to lie about that. *rubs idly at one of the bite marks* I really would have enjoyed watching.
Deidara: Hmph. Pervert. *grins faintly as he adjusts the blanket* I'd suggest using that water of your on those, hn...
Pein: *laughs* I know I'm a fucking pervert.
Deidara: *smirks and turns around, facing Pein as he backs out of the room* Indeed, hn. Sweet dream, Pein-daana. *flashes Pein and winks, licking his lips teasingly*
Pein: Can I at least get my fucking blanket back?
Deidara: *drops the blanket by the door, twirling on the spot as he leaves the room behind in search of more excitement and sexual exploits *
Pein: *shakes his head and sighs as he gets up to grab the blanket* *maybe peeks down the hall to watch Deidara as he leaves* *works on cleaning up the mess that Deidara made of the room and of himself*
Who: Pein and Konan
What: Pein cleans up after Deidara leaves and explains to Konan what happened.
Where: Akatsuki House #2, Pein and Konan's bedroom
When: Tuesday, October 2nd
Why: Because we wanted to log them and this just happened to make sense.
Also: Very schmoopy. I didn't know evil could be so cute.
Pein: *is laying in bed after having replaced the door and cleaning up after Deidara* *futzing around on his laptop, trying not to think about all the pain he's in*
Konan: *opens the door* Pein? Deidara's in a mood, you know anything about it?
Pein: *sets his laptop aside when he hears Konan come in* Unfortunately yes. *doesn't think it'll take a genius to notice all the bite marks and bruises* *just hopes Konan will trust that he didn't do anything he shouldn't have*
Konan: .....*stares at* What..... what happened to you. *sits down next to him on the bed*
Pein: Deidara fucking happened. *leans over and rests his head on Konan's shoulder* He wasn't too happy that I wouldn't give in and have sex with him.
Konan: *small smile and runs a hand though his hair* I'm proud. But....
Pein: *sighs* I didn't fucking want anything from him in the first place. He just barged in here trying to get me to.
Konan: *stares at hands* I know... it's just... I do love you but I can't help but feel like maybe you'd rather not have just me.
Pein: *looks up at her* Why do you think that?
Konan: *shrugs, doesn't look at him* I don't know. I mean.... you love me and I love you and that should be it, right?
Pein: *nods* It should be.
Konan: And it is.... but... I don't want to limit you but I want you with me.
Pein: *reaches up and runs a hand through her hair, effectively making sure she's looking at him* You're not limiting me. There should be no need for limiting at all. I'm sorry that I fucked up and made you feel like this.
Konan: *smiles* You're forgiven, you know that. It's just.... we've got a lot to work out, together.
Pein: I know. But hearing you talk like that makes me feel bad. *is such a sap omfg*
Konan: *kisses* You should feel bad, but I don't want you to feel miserable.
Pein: *kisses back* I'm only feeling miserable because of all this. *motions to the bite marks and bruises* The family jewels bore witness to Deidara's rage, too. Multiple times.
Konan: *clucks* My poor Pein, so abused by everyone.
Pein: Ko-chan, that sounded condescending.
Konan: *fake gasp* Nonsense!
Pein: *sticks his tongue out at Konan* Instead of teasing me, maybe you could help me out a bit?
Konan: *smirk* Maybe. *focus chakra* Where does it hurt the most?
Pein: *lifts up the waistband of his pj pants and withdraws a melted pack of ice* There.
Konan: *laughs* * places hand on the very fragile family jewels* I can't believe he punched you in the nuts.
Pein: Didn't punch. He used his knee. I stopped counting after the third time. *doesn't find this funny at all*
Konan: *slightly shocked face* All because you wouldn't sleep with him?
Pein: No, it was because I bit his tongue when he tried to kiss me.
Konan: He tried to kiss you? *eyes narrow*
Pein: Yes. He took advantage of the fact that I was yelling at him and had an open mouth.
Konan: I'm proud of your self control. *kisses*
Pein: *kisses* *definitely brushed his teeth between the time when Deidara left and now* As attractive as I find him when he's not trying to molest me, I love you more. *might not have been the best thing to say, but it was the honest one*
Konan: *eyes narrow* We're going to have to work on tact, Pein.
Pein: Sorry, Ko-chan. *shrinks down a bit and smiles at her*
Konan: *finishes healing the spot* Where next, Pein-kun? *smiles back*
Pein: Everywhere else is pretty much the same. Just anywhere you see a bruise or bite.
Konan: *starts healing from the bottom up* You are wonderful for putting up with so much abuse.
Pein: You make it sound like there was another choice. *knows there was, but he's definitely trying to earn some points*
Konan: Don't play innocent, Pein. *smiles*
Pein: *grins* Okay, I won't. I put up with it because what Deidara did to me hurt a lot less than what you would have put me through if I had given in. *is still lacking in the tact department*
Konan: *scowls* I think I prefer innocent over lack of tact.
Pein: I wasn't even thinking about what you'd put me through if I gave in while it was happening. I was only thinking about not wanting to do it and wanting you.
Konan: Sometimes one would never think you're the mastermind of an evil group bent on ruling the world. But that's why I love you.
Pein: *isn't sure if he should be insulted or not* *opts for not* Is that the only reason?
Konan: Of course not, silly. I can't list the reasons why I love you - I wouldn't know where to begin.
Pein: Good. *smirks* Then I'm definitely in love with the right girl.
Konan: *rolls eyes and finishes healing* We're just made for each other, you know?
Pein: *senses the sarcasm* Without rain, the trees couldn't grow to make paper. *doesn't even really know what he's saying*
Konan: Rain turns paper into a soggy mess.
Pein: And that's why I stop the rain for you.
Konan: I appreciate it. *kisses*
Pein: *kisses* Thanks for healing me up, Ko-chan.
Konan: Anytime, love. And I'd rather have you black and blue than cheating.
Pein: I'd rather you be happy, even if it means turning colors.
Konan: And I am happy. Very much so.
Pein: Even though I still have that wandering eye problem? *cringes a little in anticipation of her reaction*
Konan: As long as you don't act on it, I can't really complain, can I? I wish you'd stop, though.
Pein: I promise it will only be my eye that wanders. *holds his fingers up in a way that mocks every boy scout out there* And I'll work on stopping it. If I was a horse, blinders might do the trick.
Konan: *grins* Maybe blinders wouldn't be that bad of an idea....
Pein: *pouts* It's a terrible idea.
Konan: *rolls eyes* Fine. *lays down and curls up next to him* Though... it's always a choice.
Pein: *wraps his arms around her and pulls her close* It fucking isn't.
Konan: *wraps her arms around him as well* We'll see.
Pein: I can't be a proper ninja if I have no periphial vision. *kisses her cheek*
Konan: Fine, fine. *yawns slightly* If only for the sake of making sure you don't get killed.
Pein: Bit hard to keep you happy if I'm dead. *yawns* Don't you know yawns are fucking contagious?
Konan: Which is another reason to keep you alive. And I'm tired, I can't help it. I'm not a medic ninja you know.
Pein: *snuggles closer* I know you're not, and thank you. I'll lay here with you while you nap.
Konan: *closes eyes* Thanks. *mumbles slightly* Love you.
Pein: Love you, too. *presses another kiss to her cheek* *winds up falling alseep before she does*